Legs
by SingingSongbird
Summary: One snowy night Brittany gets hit by a car and loses control of her legs. New friendships will be made and unrequited love will be returned. Life itself in Lima will become completely altered. Brittana/Faberry with friendships! Bad Ending, be warned.
1. One Snowy Night

**Alright, so I decided to start this because I really like the idea and my other story isn't doing too well. I'm going to make this one a way more quality fic and like really think it through! I may take a week to update but chapters will get longer. Enjoy! T for language and alcohol, may become M in future chapters!  
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_I own nothing!_

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"_There are two things that one must get used to or one will find life unendurable: the damages of time and injustices of men."- Chamfort _

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Radiant white snow crystals fluently swayed down the winter's night sky as rhythmic beats pulsed faintly through the desolate streets, blaring out from the Puckerman's house. Snow is a very rare occurrence in Ohio, though this year it came heavily and freezing without any warnings. McKinley High had been closed this week due to these harsh conditions and so partying became a vital importance to it's freed students. It was still Sunday and the night remains young, leaving the raging party within the Puckerman's walls progressing by the moment.

Senior year hasn't been too kind to Santana so far. She couldn't conjure up the courage to come out to her parents, knowing all too well how lethally they would react upon it, and so Brittany refused to be with her. They scarcely talked as friends over the summer and during the first marking period. Even as they stare at each other through the crowd of drunk dancers passing by, it is solemn and heart breaking.

After Santana couldn't bore into those gorgeous blue eyes anymore, she turned away and hurried herself over to where the alcohol has been messily laid out on the kitchen table. At least Brittany couldn't get her here, she already knew the girl wouldn't follow her. The possibility of an alcohol problem didn't cross Santana's mind as she chugged down the drinks forcefully, one after another. She knew by the time her sight began to blur she had done her job well.

"Santana!"

She cringed at the full use of her name from _those _lips. Before she could plot an escape, Brittany had roughly gripped her forearms and spun her around. Now face to face and too close for comfort, they breathed one anothers air and simply gazed in awe at the proximity of their faces. Brittany's nose scrunched as the stinging odor of alcohol hit her. She felt a small defeat come over her.

"You know I don't like it when you drink, San," her tone became soft and laced with guilt.

Looking beggingly into Santana's deep, molten, dark chocolate eyes, she couldn't help but feel a wash of shame weighing down on her. Santana was only drinking because she wouldn't be with her; she could hardly even look at her anymore.

"Why should I care about your feelings," the Latina began, more harshly than she had previously intended. "When you don't care about mine."

Brittany nearly flinched at the girl's words; the pain of hearing them spat out almost physically striking. Santana's face grew grim as she frowned up to Brittany with a flushed face. Tension continued rising in the small gap between them as both girls couldn't help but notice how stunning the other looked tonight.

"You know how much I care about you," the blonde murmured, trailing her hands down to entwine her pale fingers with tan ones.

Santana felt the pads of Brittany's thumbs soothe her palms with a light massage. Her gaze fell to their locked hands, eyelids becoming heavy with need. As the alcohol began to kick in, tears rimmed and glossed her somber eyes.

"No, Brittany," she looked back up into those blue eyes. "I don't anymore. I thought I used to, but what do I know. You left me for a damn cripple last year..."

Santana trailed off lowly, averting her eyes to the shut door of the kitchen to make sure of no intruders. Brittany caught this and was sure of Santana's intentions. She squinted her blue eyes with an offensive look, parting her lips to gape at Santana with disbelief.

"You've got to be joking," Brittany stated, clearly offended. "Even after all this, you're _still _scared if anyone would walk in just to, like, get a drink or something? They wouldn't be so shocked to see us fighting and you drinking again, cause that is all we do now!"

As she finished, she drew her words out and slammed her palms together with each to make herself crystal clear with her ex-best friend. Santana sunk away a little when she saw how Brittany began to power herself, energy fueling with visible pain and confliction.

"Whatever, don't worry about it," the blonde began, never seeming so sure of herself before. "I came here to dance and forget about you. I don't care if you're here or not- I don't even know you anymore!"

Brittany strongly held her head up as she began to stride gracefully for the door. She stopped dead in front of the pivotal wooden panel when she figured Santana wouldn't run after her. Sore hurt contorted her angelic features, hands twisting into tight fist shaking at her sides as tears pooled in her deepening eyes. She spun herself around with an incredibly determined fire and marched right into Santana until she had her against the sink. Trapping the smaller girl with her toned arms on either side of her body, she slowly leaned forward and spoke into her ear delicately.

_"My _Santana would fight for me. She wouldn't let me walk away. She wouldn't drink. She would hold me through this cold storm. She would sing to me. But she. _Wouldn't_. Let. Me. Walk. Away."

Leaving Santana with that, Brittany stormed out the door and loudly slammed it shut behind her. Santana shivered when the loud bang rang into her ears and wrapped her arms around herself. She internally repeated to herself that Brittany doesn't and wouldn't understand, before she picked up more drinks. The drinks continued on for awhile, slowly draining her health and brain cells until it got to the point when everything around her spun in blurry colors.

_"I fucking love parties!" _Santana cried out, intoxicated beyond belief as she bursts out from the kitchen door.

Puck spun around in the crowd, a wicked grin stretching his face as he managed and twisted through the heavily dancing bodies to Santana. He could already smell the alcohol in her breath.

"Santana, looks like someone has been drinking," he chuckled with a sly wink. "Problems with Brittany again?"

Santana shot him an annoyed look before rolling her eyes obnoxiously. She nodded her head, nonetheless.

"Well, just don't do anything dumb, okay?" He asked, raising his brows while playing with his beer.

"You're not my dad," Santana instantly scoffed, brushing past him.

He looked down and sighed before shrugging his shoulders. Internally, he told himself that if anything, he tried. When he saw that a near jock had his eye on her, he automatically walked up to him and roughly shoved him.

"Hey, watch it buddy!" He growled, pushing the jock's chest out so he got the guy's full attention.

He looked at Puck with a pissed off and questioning face.

"What the hell, man? I still never tapped that ass," he grinned to himself confidently, looking off at Santana dancing intoxicated with other guys.

Brittany watched the Latina from the worn couch, sitting with tightly crossed arms. She got up and walked off to sit outside for a little fresh air. Puck shoved the persistent bastard again, this time with much more force.

"What the fuck is your problem!" He roared, fully pissed at Puck.

"What is _your _problem! Lay off Santana!"

"Fuck you! I'll do what I want!"

"This is my fucking house and I will deck your sorry ass if you don't lay the fuck. OFF!"

The jock clenched his fists, but his shoulders eventually shrugged down.

"Whatever, fuck you," he hissed, walking away with some other drunk girl.

Puck smiled proudly to himself before turning to walk outside. The party seemed to only increase, but he made his way through the crowd. He slowly opened the door and peered out for the lost blonde. Brittany sat on a lone swing in his small yard, looking down as she kicked the shining snow below her heels. He walked over to her casually and took a seat next to her.

"Hey, Brittany," he offered a small smile, but the blonde didn't turn to see it. "Uhh, how are you feeling?"

She remained in silence and ignored him, watching her breaths leave in mists. He sighed and nudged her lightly, hoping for some conference.

"I love Santana."

Puck's eyes widened at Brittany's sudden and blunt statement. He nodded off his head before ending up with a howling laughter. Brittany turned to him with an odd look on her face.

"What!" She growled, cranking her fists tighter on the swing.

Puck held up his hand to indicate he needed to catch his breath. He took one last deep inhale before swinging his head to look back at Brittany.

"Bout time you admit it," he smiled professionally with his Puckerman charm.

Brittany frowned at him before looking back to the snow. Her shoulders slacked down with her grip.

"She won't let me hold her hand in front of other people," Brittany began lowly. " I think she stopped fighting for me..."

Puck suddenly stood off his swing and glared down at the blonde. She looked back up to him weakly and innocently. He leaned down with an intense frown.

"Don't be such a pussy! Listen, Brittany," Puck began to explain, pacing around with his extreme explanation. "I've known you and Santana both for, what, my whole life? But, let's see here. Santana always slept with guys to look straight, but it left her disgusted. And she always loved you. I remember her mauling me when we were little cause I called you stupid. Sorry, by the way. But, last year, you went out with Artie. That's all I know, except when you guys sang 'Landslide'. Nice, by the way. And it just seems like she's been the one always fighting for you. And, maybe now you have to fight for her."

Brittany sat and simply absorbed Puck's words. Then it hit her, he was right. She had fought for Santana before, but she hardly tried. Santana bared her feelings to her times before and she only tried to make her jealous before leaving her for Artie. She never felt so stupid, actually, and got up off the swing.

"You're so right!" She smiled with a new confidence.

Puck grinned back at her and patted her shoulders. He loves Brittany like a sister, also Santana, so he knew he actually did the right thing in his life this time.

"Go get her, tiger," he softly ordered before she burst off.

He smiled, watching one of his closest friends going off to accomplish something that would change their life forever. Brittany sprinted at top speed, full with giddiness and clarity. Nothing could stop her from Santana now.

She burst through the doors of the party and shoved her way into the pulsating crowd. She searched and searched, but Santana never caught her eye. Brittany began to panic as the party spun around her and the Latina was nowhere in sight. Her breath hitched when she got an idea of where the girl might be. She prayed that she wasn't right.

Carefully, she made her way up the stairs and cautiously looked down the hallway. Her steps creaked loudly into her ears as she peered around at the doors. She finally caught a sound and cautiously leaned into the door, listening carefully.

_"Whoa! Did you see that shit!"_

_ "No, you're just wasted."_

_ "Nuh-uh, you're just fucking ugly."_

_ "Fuck, Santana, your shorts are so fucking tight! Help me get them off already!"_

Brittany thrashed the door open, letting it fly into the wall and leave a small dent. A random jock was on top of an almost passed out Santana laying on Puck's bed. He turned, shocked at first, before slyly smirking. Brittany's heart dropped.

"You wanna join, babe?"

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" Brittany roared, pointed at the door as tears rimmed her eyes.

He got up from the bed slowly, his hands held high as he made his way out of the room. Puck sprang out from beside Brittany and pounced into him. The jock's head slammed into the hardwood floor as Puck constantly punched his face until blood spat out from his mouth.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO FUCKING GO NEAR SANTANA!" He bellowed, beating on the guy nonstop.

Brittany stood at the doorway, shivering and looking at Santana with glistening blue eyes. Her nose and cheeks were a deep pink from the cold outdoors and her bright hair a little messy. Santana sobered a little and watched Brittany with an open mouth and pained expression.

"Santana," Brittany chocked out a whisper.

The tan girl sprung up from the bed and took a hesitant step. Brittany took a step back in response. Santana reached a pleading hand out.

"Britt, please," she tried, averting to begging.

Brittany shook her head before turning around and darting away.

"BRITTANY! WAIT!" Santana called out.

"RUN FOR HER SANTANA! JUST FUCKING RUN!" Puck demanded, punched the guy square in the jaw.

Santana didn't wait another moment before sprinting as fast as she could after Brittany. They tore through the crowd, which became confused by all of the moving around from these two girls. The door of the house nearly broke down as Brittany shoved past it and out into the winter night. Santana trailed behind, calling and begging.

"I don't want to see you anymore, Santana!"

Santana hardly heard Brittany's words. She had all of her attention on the speeding car racing down the icy street. Her eyes went back to Brittany, who was headed right into the doomed street.

_**"BRITTANY!" **_Santana shrieked, running for the oblivious blonde.

Brittany ignored Santana's pleas and began to soar across the street. She became paralyzed when two bright headlights lit her way. The breaks on the car burned against the ice as it came down at top speed for Brittany. Santana was already running through the streets for Brittany but everything was happening too fast.

She was so close to Brittany, so close. When she was about to leap and push the girl out of the way, the car flew by before her eyes. It almost happened in slow motion, the car's lights passing in fluid motions along with the vehicle.

_BANG_

The car had directly hit Brittany.

The driver drove harshly away before any cops could come, the tires shrieking and smoking against the ice.

The blonde was laying in the snowy streets, blood beginning to pool around her.

"BRITTANY!" Santana cried out, running and collapsing by the girl's side.

Brittany weakly looked around, disoriented and pained. The party began to ooze out of the house like a paper cut and huddled around Brittany and Santana. Quinn had already called the paramedics the second she heard the commotion outside. Santana didn't notice anyone or anything else, the only thing that was clear in her vision was Brittany as she cradled her in her strong arms.

Her tears dropped onto Brittany's cheeks below her, falling from Santana's thick lashes. She gently pushed some stray strands of blonde off Brittany's bloody face and so delicately cupped her chin.

"Don't leave me now, Britt," Santana weakly ordered, more tears dropping.

Brittany only stared back, in complete shock and pain. Her body quivered even in Santana's warm embrace.

"I can't- feel my legs, San..." Was all Brittany could whimper into the freezing air.

A loud tune rang down the street as flashing lights lit the night with bright blues and reds. The paramedics skidded to a stop near the crowd before the medics burst out the back doors. Their stomps were loud and demanding as they harshly shoved their way through the crowd with a readied stretcher.

"GET OUT THE WAY! OUT OF THE WAY FOLKS!"

Santana only held Brittany tighter as the medics made their way to them. She rocked back and forth with her sobs climbing up her throat, refusing to let Brittany go to anyone. Brittany is truly the love of her life and she could never deny that even to herself. They grew up together, every moment and laugh they shared meant the world to her. She broke down at the thought she may never hear Brittany's chiming laughter once more.

Sounds swam around Santana's ears as the medics pulled her arms free from Brittany. Her rebellious screams came fuzzily heard to herself as she belted them out from the top of her closing lungs. The sirens continued on from the vehicle as Brittany was placed safety onto the stretcher.

"Let me go with her! Let me go with her, dammit!"

Santana's pleas were ignored. Only one woman lingered with her for a moment, rubbing the sobbing girl's back reassuring.

"She is more damaged than she looks. Don't worry, we'll make sure we can do everything to the best of our abilities to help your friend."

With that, the woman was off and into the large car. Santana sat weakly in the streets as her eyes watched Brittany being carried to the back into an open space. She didn't even notice the crowd watching or the fact that they still remained with her. Her body slumped forward, frail with helplessness. The paramedics drove off with her broken love.

Puck knelled to Santana's side and tightly embraced her shaking body. He soothed her back, attempting to calm her tenseness.

"Don't worry, Britt's strong. She'll pull through," he promised. "She always does..."

Santana sobbed and clung to his back sharply, twisting his shirt within her fists.

"I can't loose her. I love her," she cried out into only his ears.

"I know you do. I know."

Santana cried a bit harder.

"The last words she told me was that she couldn't feel her legs..." She lowly explained.

Puck pulled back to look at Santana with wide eyes.

"No. Fuck, no." He hissed, slamming his fist to the gravel.


	2. The Pierces

**Thank you guys for the reviews, it really makes me confident and interested. As long as you guys like it, it won't end! Please read and review AND ESPECIALLY enjoy! This chapter is little more of a filler but I do promise they will get longer and intense. This is just getting everyone emotionally ready and pointing out how it affects the characters. I also give some history on their relationship in younger years.  
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_I own nothing!_

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"_Even cats grow lonely and anxious."- Mason Cooley _

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Two trekking hours have drained down the emptied streets since Brittany had been struck by that car. People left from an hour before, the party was clearly beyond from over. Santana situated herself on the lone swing Brittany was on before everything. Puck already began cleaning the inside of his house but still checked on his friend from the window every few passing minutes.

Santana merely swayed her body lamely, wavering forward and back on the swing. No energy or emotion ran through her body as she simply watched her breaths carry away. There was a somber feeling throughout the town tonight, it's undeniable. Brittany was the star on top of the Christmas tree for almost everyone living around these parts. She would light up peoples' day as she lights Santana's life.

After another few lonesome minutes, Santana called it a night and got up from the swing. She looked down at Brittany's footprints in the snow as she walked next to them, imagining Brittany walking beside her. They would be walking to her home together right now; they should be. Santana sighed and continued on.

Street lights dimly glow Santana a solemn yellow path home. It certainty wasn't the yellow brick road, though she hopes it to be. She wishes she could clack her ruby slippers together and make Brittany come back to her again. This was reality though, and it's tough shit.

She halted her steps when she found her house staring back at her. Her father's car was gone, as usual. He worked long hours at the hospital but it was no secret his nights were spent at bars and cheap hotels. She made herself sure to call him tomorrow so she could get to Brittany. All she wants is Brittany.

Only her mother is inside the house. Rage consumes Santana because that woman is the whole reason why Brittany wouldn't be with her, that and this poor excuse for a school. Why does the world have to revolve around labels? Brittany would always say labels are silly because they're for cans. Santana wishes the world would just see itself as Brittany sees it; beautiful and simple. She is not saying that everyone should be dumb, that would be silly because we need new inventions. She just wants peace.

Santana internally tells herself she is fierce and doesn't need love. She needs Brittany though and she knows that. The only problem is that she is deeply in love with her. She doesn't look at it as a problem though, she would never. Their love was more of a blessing, not a gift or praise but a pure blessing. True love almost never happens anymore.

Instead of slamming the door open and storming to beat her mother, Santana keeps herself contained and lightly opens the door. She heads up the stairs, ignoring her mother who doesn't care anyway. Her mother only exists when she needs to pressure Santana into being the perfect daughter. Otherwise, Santana basically lives alone.

"I got a call from the Pierces!"

Santana stops on the stairs when her mother calls for her. She turned and stops a few stairs away from her.

"Yeah, Brittany was hit by a speeding car..." Santana tried to hold back the tears rimming her eyes as she tried to explain.

Her mother lowly nodded. Suddenly, she started walking up the stairs for her daughter. Santana watched in shock as her mother went right up to her and encased her in an embrace. She couldn't recall the last time her mother hugged her.

"Brittany is such a good girl and I know how close you are with her, mija," Santana's mom whispers as she soothes her daughter's hair. "Her parents want us to stay with them tonight and go to visit Brittany tomorrow with them. I said we would so go pack your stuff quick!"

As her mother spoke, Santana's face slowly lit up. Not only did the Pierces still treat her like family after Brittany and her haven't been in contact for months, but her mother also did. Santana began to wonder if this tragedy has brought their families together again. Maybe their families were never apart...

"Okay, Mami!" Santana smiled, hugging back before darting to her room.

Her mother watched her daughter run with a smirk gracing her face. Santana flew down the hall and went right into her room with giddy child steps. There, she soared to her dresser and drew her clothes out hastily. She was on a roll until she turned to her bed and caught a picture with her eyes.

The picture illustrated her and Brittany together, about five years old, clinging to each other in the pool and smiling at the camera. Their hair was was soaked and messily plastered on their bright faces. Above, the sun was beating down on them and rimming their figures with an orange silhouette. Santana remembers the memory as if it were yesterday.

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><p><em>"I'm gonna get you!" Little Santana playfully growled as she splashed around sloppily. <em>

_ Brittany's laughter rang high as she retreated to the shallow end of the small pool in her yard. Santana swam quickly after her and caught her by the foot. Brittany screamed, instantly pulling her legs into her body along with Santana. She noticed Santana strongly gripped her so she wrapped her arms around her and simply held her in the water. Santana was too short to stand where Brittany stood in the pool._

_ "I got you," Brittany giggled as Santana latched onto her._

_ The Latina pulled away a little to glare at the blonde. She rolled her eyes and laughed._

_ "I was supposed to get you!" She explained, splashing Brittany lightly. _

_ Brittany gasped and splashed back, laughing and screaming. Their instant splash fight cooled down as Santana let Brittany hold her again. They were nicely content before both of their loud mothers burst through the back door._

_ "Stay like that! It's too cute!" Brittany's mom ordered as Santana's mother trailed after her with a ready camera._

_ The two young girls gaped at their mothers silly actions. They glanced at each other before giggling to themselves. Santana's mom squatted down and began her "professional" picture session with them._

_ "Maaaa! Turn the flash off, it's hurting my eyes!" Santana whined, covering her eyes as Brittany held her up. _

_ Both of the older women laughed and stopped harassing their daughters with the constant picture taking. Santana looked sheepishly at Brittany who only smiled brightly back. _

_ "What are you ladies doing to the girls!" Brittany's dad howled with laughter, walking out to put his arm around his wife. _

_ Santana looked hopelessly at her mother when she saw her dad was nowhere to be found. He was out, again. Even as Santana is in her years of growing, he is not present. _

_ "Oh, we were just taking pictures. They were being really cute, weren't you two?" Brittany's mom smiled at them._

_ Brittany madly nodded her head, clinging tighter to Santana who almost began to choke. Santana scrunched her face but smiled and nodded along with Brittany. _

_ "San is always cute!" Brittany proudly stated with a large grin, spinning them in the water._

_ Santana ducked her head down when she left her face heat up. She pouted out her lips and shook her head violently._

_ "See!" Britanny pointed out, laughing with the parents._

_ "You are so silly!" Santana smiled, gently shoving Brittany's shoulders._

_ "And you are so small!" Brittany smiled back. "...And silly!"_

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><p>Santana slowly walked up to the picture, cupping it as the memories swam vividly in her head. A warm smile graced her face despite the fact Brittany was currently being saved in the emergency room. She could only imagine all the doctors running around the blonde as they cut and stitched around her. Tears of joy and worry rimmed her eyes as she gazed at the photograph.<p>

After taking a good long look at the colors, Santana placed the picture in her bag neatly. She slung it over her shoulders and started for the stairs. Her steps were a little slower than usual as she sauntered down the steps. Brittany's absence began to settle in.

"C'mon, mija!" Santana's mother called out from the door.

Santana gripped the rails, stepping down the stairs and making her way over to the door. Her mother offered her a smile and held the door open for her. Santana simply walked forward, ignoring the supposedly warming smile. The only smile she wants right now is Brittany's. The only smile she would always want is Brittany's.

Throwing her bag into the back seats, Santana slumped into the passenger seat and waited for her mother. She kept an apathetic mask on. Silence filled the car. Gazing at the world without Brittany out her window, Santana felt half empty. Lustrous colors pass by her roaming eyes peacefully as the tired rolled against the iced gravel. Colors filled with no meaning without the blonde dancing around in them, swirling them in a dazzling mixture.

Everything glows a florescent white beyond the cold window. Inside, the car is a content temperature. Santana and her mother weren't complaining. Silence grow and grow until it was towering over them. Santana's mother had to cut it.

"Are you worried?" She asked, keeping her eyes on the road.

Santana turned away from the window to look at her mother. Both of their expressions remained unreadable.

"Too much for words..." She finally whispered, trailing off at the end.

Her mother nodded her head in response and continued on without another word. She thought of things to say and comfort her daughter but couldn't come up with any at the moment. Her fingers began to tap on the wheel as she drove intently.

"Well, don't worry," she spoke, sudden.

Santana scoffed at her mother's practical demand and crossed her arms. She shook her head with a deep sigh.

"She's closer to me than you are," Santana pointed out, looking at her mother by the side.

Her fingers ceased tapping on the wheel and settled into a bothered grip. Santana closely watched her mother's face for any change. There was none to appear.

"I know and I'm sorry for that, but I am your mother," she began with a deepening look. "And you are my daughter. So after Brittany is fine and healthy again, we need to spend some time together. Just you and me."

Santana wants to gape at her mother but thinks better of it. Instead, she pulls her head back slightly and absorbs the words one at a time. The last thing she wants to do now is get close with her mother now, though. She knows that will lead to bonding, which will lead to confessions, which will lead to her disownment. As much as she doesn't want to admit it, Santana is actually scared to become homeless and hated.

"Uh, sure," was Santana's quiet reply.

Her mother nodded brightly and continued driving. They were at the Pierce's within a few minutes. Santana got her bag and walked up the white painted wooden steps of their porch. She rang the door bell, leaning forward and back on her heels as she patiently waited.

The front door slowly creaked open. Brittany's mom's head poked out to find Santana looking back at her with the smallest smile in the world. She faked a smile and pulled the door open for the girl to walk in. Santana's mom walked in after her.

Instantly dropping her bag to the floor, Santana spun around to tightly embrace Brittany's mom with a sudden urgency. She gasped at first but hugged back quickly. Tears began to pool in Santana's shut eyes.

"I missed this place so much," she whispered truly.

Brittany's mom smiled sadly and nodded before pulling away to take a good look at how Santana has grown in the few months. She held the girl's slim shoulders and ruffled her hair playfully.

"My, haven't you grown! It's great to see you again, Santana," she spoke, despite the fact her daughter is currently having heavy surgery done on her.

Santana's mom came up and shook Brittany's mom's hand. They both shared a small smile and began talking about everything they missed. Santana let them be and hoisted up her bag.

"Oh, you're going to sleep in- Brittany's room so you should get your stuff out," Santana could her the break in her voice when the girl's mother said her daughter's name.

She nodded to her and began up the stairs. Everything looks so familiar and comfortable. It feels and smells like home again. She gazes at the pictures of Brittany and her family passing by on the blue walls. As she stepped up, the pictures got older and older until close to present day. The picture timeline has never failed to grace a smile across Santana's face.

Her steps stopped when Brittany's door is standing in front of her. She let her fingers trail up every break and carve of the girl's name in the door. The yellow paint chipped only slightly over the years, it looks barely noticeable. Santana can faintly smell Brittany's fruit scent already.

Cautiously, she pushes the door open and leans in. Brittany's delicious smell hits her instantly, strongly and suddenly. She inhales and exhales the memories running through her head. Santana feels so filled yet so empty. Her eyes fall to the bed, left undone and tangled. Brittany never does her bed.

Santana gently sets her bag down and trudges over to it. Her body feels heavy with the need to sleep and all the emotional drain she has been through. Brittany is all that runs through her head as she collapses onto the bed and folds her body into the pillows and blankets. She deeply inhales Brittany's scent and begins to sob hysterically.

"Come home, Britt. I need you," she cries into the pillow constricted in her tight embrace.

Sleep gently washes over her after awhile and her breaths become steady. The crying stops and gets replaced by light snores. Drool oozes down the corners of her open mouth as she dreams about the angelic blonde being at her side, holding her.

Tomorrow will be another day, a brighter day; a day with Brittany. Her precious blonde is just a day away. Santana doesn't think or dream of anything else in the meantime.

As the worn girl slumbers, a large cat wonders by in the night. It recognizes her and carelessly leaps up onto the bed. The girl isn't it's owner but the form is familiar and comfortable. Nonetheless, it curls up against the inside of the girl's lightening embrace and snuggled in.

If cats could grin, Lord Tubbington would into Santana's triceps.


	3. The Hospital

_**Aww, you guys ready for another chapter? Thank you SO SO MUCH for the amazing reviews it's really motivating! :) Hope you enjoy! Please Review!**_

_I own nothing!_

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_"Friends are the most important ingredient in this recipe of life." - Dior Yamasaki_

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_ "Get off me!" Santana ordered, a little low as to be conscious of the crowd around her._

_ Brittany gave her a broken look that silently begged for her to understand. Santana had already shoved Brittany's arms away from her and the damage was done, there was nothing left to understand. Artie had left his mark. Relinquishment weighed down Brittany's shoulders as she watched her childhood playmate and former lover storm away from her. It was so much more than that, though._

_ Quinn observed the whole scene from a distance and, when it was clear, walked after Santana. She already knew about the two of them since not only a year ago she accidentally walked in on them after practice. At first she couldn't accept it due to her religious ways. They're her friends though and they needed some kind of support. It would be wrong to leave them in such a dark manner._

_ Santana had made her way outside to the bleachers by the time Quinn had caught up. She pants heavily but forced herself up the steps, loudly banging on the vibrating aluminum below her shoes. Santana rolled her eyes and glared at her as she approached._

_ "What the hell could you want at a time like this, Fabray?" She spat out darkly._

_ Quinn gave her a look before sitting down next to her to catch her breath. Once her body was steady and content with air, she turned to the Latina with a sympathetic look. Her hand lifted up to rest on the crying girl's arm and began to gently stroke it._

_ "I saw what happened in the hallway," Quinn quietly explained, eyeing Santana's facial expression._

_ Santana took a sharp inhale and nodded, accepting the fact Quinn had seen her so weak. She just hoped that not too many other people did. So many questions raced through her mind._

_ "Am I not worth it?" She suddenly asked, speaking her thoughts and looking back at Quinn. "After all this time? I'm less than a damn cripple to her?"_

_ Quinn sternly shook her head while staring meaningfully into Santana's deep and dark eyes. The tan girl still couldn't find her believable._

_ "Brittany doesn't know what she wants," Quinn reassures her. "This is Brittany we're talking about. C'mon, S."_

_ Santana rolls her eyes again and turned away instantly. Quinn looks at her back questioningly and wonders what she could have done wrong now._

_ "Don't call Brittany stupid just because she isn't here!" She demanded, not turning back to Quinn. "Everyone thinks she's stupid but she's really not."_

_ Quinn's mouth gaped as she nodded her head, clarity washing over her. She forgot even Santana would get sensitive when people would try to insult Brittany's intelligence in anyway. In fact, if Quinn was someone else, she would be dead right now. She bowed her head and felt a little guilty._

_ "Sorry, you're right," she apologized, looking up at Santana's back with hope. "Brittany is smart. I'm just being a little mad at her for you right now."_

_ Santana stiffened a little before spinning around to face Quinn. She never looked so dead on the inside._

_ "I'm not mad at her. I just- can't be," Santana began lowly and weakly. "Even after she's left me. I just- ugh. It's not going to be the same after this. I just know it. All I can do is still try for her but..."_

_ Quinn nodded as she talked, understanding the girl. No relationship would be the same after such a pivotal turn like this, not even Santana and Brittany's. Truth was, Brittany didn't understand and Santana didn't want to accept that. Santana still believes that after all this time she and Brittany had been together it would change Brittany. This was proof nothing could change that girl, it's going to have to take a whole lot more than that._

_ Santana looked down after she had trailed off. Quinn gave her a smile and scooted over to embrace her friend. Santana sat there at first in shock. Slowly, her arms moved up to hug the blonde back. _

_ "Why did we ever grow apart, Santana?" She asked into the girl's shoulder. _

_ Santana shook her head, shrugging in the embrace. Quinn tightened her grip._

_ "Could we fix that?" She asked again, voice laced with little sparks of hope._

_ Tears pooled once again in Santana's eyes as a smile spread across her face. She lightly bit her bottom lip._

_ "I would really like that, Q," she whispered back, tightening her grip as well. "I've never needed you more than right now..."_

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><p>"SANTANA!"<p>

"Geez!" Santana hissed before she accidentally rolled off the bed and slammed into the wood floor with a loud thud.

Lord Tubbington still sat on the bed professionally, staring ahead blankly as always. Santana suddenly sat up and looked around the room with her hair a mess. She peered with her dark eyes in slits. Lord Tubbington and her finally made lighting eye contact.

"Today's the day," she told him lowly, darkly.

The cat stares back emotionless but intently. Suddenly, she pounces up and catches the fat blob in an intense cuddle.

"I know we hate each other but I'm happy to see you again!" Santana sang, overjoyed by the fact she's going to see Brittany today. "I'm going to stay with Brittany for awhile but I'll be back. Don't take my cigars!"

Santana stopped herself dead, her eyes widening. She truly was going insane without Brittany. She felt like she was _becoming _Brittany. Not that Brittany is insane or anything but that she would always converse with things that wouldn't respond.

Santana shrugged to herself and sprung off the bed. She did her whole morning routine, shower, her hair, makeup, clothes, everything. Within an hour she was all perked up and prepared, physically. Emotionally, she is wracking her body around and praying not to break down before everyone. She knows it's inevitable though.

She soared down the stairs, the pads of her feet hitting the texture for only a moment before she was through the next step. The Pierces and her mother awaited her at the door. She stopped at the bottom step and looked up at them gently gnawing her bottom lip.

"Someone is a little excited," Brittany's mom forces a smiles at Santana's giddiness.

Santana knows how devastated Brittany's mom is and her energy dies a little. She decides to nod heartily before rushing over to them. They're out the door and inside the car in moments. Santana sits quietly with her mother in the back as the Pierces drive to the hospital muted throughout the duration of the ride. It's a welcomed silence, intended.

Legs wobbling with anticipation, Santana makes her way over to the front door and holds it open for everyone kindly. They pass with a thankful smile the she returns before masking blank again, walking in after them. Brittany's mother already pushed up the the lobby desk.

"We're here to see my daughter, Brittany S. Pierce," she explains, gesturing to her husband and the two Lopezs.

The lady sat at the front desk, obnoxiously chewing her gum. She looked overweight from the permanent double chin she got every time her mouth fell down to close on the gum again. Her makeup was overdone and messy, Santana found her repugnant.

"Ahh, yes. The girl that was checked in last night," her nasal voice rang. "She didn't look too good."

Brittany's mom shot the woman an annoyed look and sighed. She tapped her knuckles against the table, waiting impatiently for the woman to scroll through her computer and find the room number. Brittany's dad already signed all the forms and them in.

"She's in room, uhh, one hundred twelve on floor B," she spoke, glancing up at everyone.

They nodded but Santana only glared at the woman for her unneeded comment before about Brittany's appearance. Brittany is always beautiful in her eyes. Santana turned to catch up with the family but stopped suddenly when a familiar face was looking at her. Her father stood by the side, looking at his daughter with an undefined expression.

Santana stared at him in awe with wide eyes. As he began to stroll towards her she shook her head with a hurt look and ran past him. He tried to grab her arm but she sunk away from his actions too fast.

"Santana, wait!"

"I don't want to hear it, Papa!" She spat back, running into the open elevator with her mother and Brittany's parents.

Her mother looked at the floor silently as the metal doors began to close on them. Dry elevator music filled the stark, enclosed space they cramped into. Santana fidgeted with her boots and the bottom of her cotton coat. Her stomach churned as she became nervous of what Brittany would really look like on those hospital beds.

She didn't know how to prepare herself for a sight she prayed never to witness in her life. Her lungs became tight and the air became hard to breath. Colors around her blurred with the tears once again pooling in her eyes. She allowed herself to get like this because she knew there was no point in fighting it.

Slowly, the metal doors opened to let them out with a faint ding to indicate they are here. Santana pushed herself out the of elevator and paced for the room. She began walking a lot faster than she thought she was.

"Santana!" Her mother called out but she ignored it, she needs Brittany.

She races down the hallway, outmaneuvering around patients walking around as she came face to face with the door 112. Her heart races within her chest as she gradually reaches out to turn the handle of the heavy door. Taking a moment, she breathes. She let her grip roam and tighten on the metal handle, twisting her fist around it. Her eyes roughly shut and she takes one last deep inhale in her nose.

Then, she pushes the door open. Light streams her way from the open window of Brittany's room. Laying on a pale blue hospital bed, Brittany sleeps so peacefully and beautifully. It's a light sleep, when Santana carefully closes the door she watched gorgeous blue eyes gradually open.

"Mmm, San?" She groans, reaching her fists up to rub her sleepy eyes.

Santana gives a sad smile and walks to knell at Brittany's side. She gently takes hold of her pale hands, scanning over the damages. Brittany has stitches under her chin and bruises above her brows. Otherwise, she looks surprisingly healthy. Sweet relief washes over Santana.

"Oh, Brittany, you had me so worried," Santana murmurs, delicately brushing stray blonde strands from her angelic face.

Brittany leans into the touch and emits a small smile. A bright halo is formed above her head with her shining locks in a mess. The sun's rays are lighting and rimming all her features, her blue eyes so clear and breath taking as they gaze into Santana's.

"You're beautiful," Santana breathes, caressing Brittany's soft cheek under her warm palm.

Brittany's smile grows as a faint pink blushes her cheeks. Santana could hear her heart rate picking up with the constant beeps on the monitor and genuanly smiles to the girl. Brittany is too cute.

"San," Brittany begins, looking up to Santana. "Hold me..."

Santana gazed at Brittany with tear filled eyes for a moment before standing up. She awkwardly moved around until she could position herself on the small bed next to Brittany. Her arms draped around the slender, familiar body.

"Britt, can you move?" She asked politely, trying to get comfortable.

Brittany's head fell instantly. Santana's breath hitched. She felt Brittany's arms just wrap around her and hold her down. Suddenly, the door burst open.

"Oh Brittany!" Brittany's mom cried out, running into the room. "Oh, sweety! How are you feeling?"

Brittany tightened her arms around Santana and smiled widely at her worried mother reassuringly. Something wasn't right about her smile, it didn't reach her eyes.

"I'm okay now, mom," she explained, her fingers twining in Santana's hair as she let the girl sob into the crook of her neck. "There's only one problem..."

Santana stiffened in Brittany's arms and wondered what the girl was going to say next. Would she tell her mother her problem was the she Santana couldn't confess of her and Brittany's relationship to her mom? Could it be something worse?

"What is it, sweety?" She asked, worry thick in her voice.

Brittany was silent for a moment. She dipped her chin into Santana's neck and took a few steady breaths to calm her nerves. Reality had hit her before and hit her _hard. _

"I- the doctor doesn't think," she took another breath, nodding to herself to finish. "I'm going to walk again..."

A most dead silence ribbon into the room and tie around everyone. Not a single peep was heard. Santana's breathing got heavier and heavier as the entire room spun around her. Her grip on Brittany twisted painfully tighter.

"But, Brittany," she cried out into her skin. "You're going to be a dance teacher!"

Brittany has never seemed so mature before. She cooed into Santana's ear and hushed the girl, rocking her a little in the bed. Santana cried weakly into her and prayed to the lord for mercy upon her beloved's soul.

"Oh my god, Brittany!" The girl's mother cried out, turning into her husband for support.

Santana's mom stood paralyzed with sorrow. She didn't know what to say or do, Brittany is such a good kid. No words could be said to justify this moment of realization in their lives. Brittany may never walk again.

Soon enough, the doctor walked in to check up on Brittany. He greeted them families politely.

"You must be her family and friends," he smiled, blue eyes wrinkling from behind his thick glasses.

"Yes," Brittany's mom nodded, anxious to hear about her daughter's health.

The doctor looked around once and began to write down on a clipboard.

"Let's see here, your daughter Brittany seems to have done damage to her spinal cord," he begins to explain, pushing his glasses up his face every few moments. "Her motor skills have been punctured and she has lost all feeling in her legs. Well, we cannot help her out with that as of now _but _there may be possibility in the future. Why don't you adults come along with me and I will explain everything."

Brittany's parents left the room, pulling Santana's mom along with them. Santana seeped deeper into Brittany's warm body after the door lightly clicked shut. Brittany continues to pet Santana's silky hair as nuzzle into her neck.

"This is all my fault," Santana murmurs, guilt weighing harshly down on her. "Please forgive me, Britt. I love you so much, I never meant for any of this. I missed you so much..."

Brittany ducked her head down and caught Santana's full lips in a lascivious kiss. Santana was taken aback before she began moaning from deep within her throat as Brittany forced their tongues to slur together in a pit of mixed saliva. Brittany never took such dominance before, Santana was almost scared. They broke apart with a trail of saliva down their tongues.

"I've wanted to do that for so long now," Brittany admits lowly, gazing into Santana's hazy eyes. "Stay with me."

Santana dumbly nods her head and leans into Brittany again. Their lips lock passionately and this time the kiss is more tender and deep. With the doctor keeping their parents busy for awhile, Brittany and Santana had all the time to catch up. That was, until the door swung open.

Both girls gasped and froze, blood draining from their bodies. They turned cautiously only to find Quinn, Puck, and...Rachel, who stared ahead with the widest eyes.

"Whoa! Didn't mean to interrupt," Puck laughed, patting Rachel's shoulder as she shivered.

Quinn shot Puck a look but couldn't help and quietly laugh at Rachel's reaction. The Jewish singer stood there, staring down at her feet as if they were the most interesting thing in the world and playing with her cold fingers.

"I- I- uhm, won't tell anyone I swear! I just wanted to check up on you guys and, uh, yeah," she mumbled, more to herself.f "I always figured there was _something _going on but I didn't consider the intensity of it..."

Her face flushed a deep red by the time she trailed off. Santana only rolled her eyes at her but knew she could trust the girl, because if she told anyone she would be dead.

"Who invited Berry?" Santana asked, eyes squinting at the dwarf.

Quinn cleared her throat and stepped out to fully catch the Latina's attention. Santana gave her a questioning look.

"She really wanted to come. Unlike you, Brittany is friends with Rachel," Quinn explains in a mockingly kind tone as Brittany nods her head eagerly.

Santana shrugs it off and slumps back into Brittany again, openly cuddling into her. Everyone pulled their head back to gape at the sight. No one has ever seen Santana this affectionate but Brittany.

"Aww, you guys. Look, this is _my _Santana," Brittany cooed, petting the girl's hair. "She's really nice and cute when no ones around but I guess she doesn't really care right now."

"Nope!" Santana smiled, rubbing her nose along Brittany's collar.

Rachel looked away and fidgeted in her spot, Puck nodded his head with guy approval, and Quinn gazed dreamily at them. Suddenly, she hit Puck on the side.

"Why can't I have a boyfriend who will cuddle with me like that?" She spat at him.

He shrugged his shoudlers before laughing quietly. There was a knock on the door and all the teens froze, Santana falling into a more casual hugging position with Brittany to not look too intimate.

Not a moment too soon, the doctor and parents poked their heads in.

"Looks like we have some more visitors," the doctor smiled creepliy.

Puck fake smiled and turned back to Brittany and Santana with a funny look. Rachel nodded in unity with Quinn.

"Well, I guess you guys can stay awhile, but you have to be out of here by nine," he sternly spoke before smiling again and leaving the room. "Have a good day."

Brittany's mom smiled at everyone in the room and opened her arms.

"Puck! Quinn! Rachel! It's good to see you guys!" She sang out, hugging them as a group.

Puck choked in the death grip as Quinn laughed with Rachel. Brittany and Santana shared a look before giggling to themselves. Santana's mom waved bye to her and she left. Santana didn't notice though, she was too caught up in Brittany's bright energy.

"We're leaving to go out tonight, I'll see you kids tomorrow," Brittany's mom winked at them before she pulled her husb and out of the room. "Sleep well, sweety."

"Bye, Britt!" He called before the door shut.

The teenagers laughed at Brittany's parents, they are quite colorful characters. Rachel smiled and turned to everyone.

"Puck, Quinn, we better get going," she pointed out, finding the time is eight. "Let the girls have their privacy."

Puck grinned chilishly before shouting an "ooooooh!" noise immaturely. Quinn slapped his side and he pretended to act in excruciating pain. Rachel gave them an impatient look and nudged them out of the room.

"Bye Brittany! Bye Santana!" They called out before Rachel shoved them out of the room.

The brunette smiled and waved to them before the door slammed shut on her face. A faint "ow!" could be heard from behind the door. Brittany laughed and looked deeply into Santana's eyes.

"I love you," she murmured, gently holding Santana's little chin with her thumb and index finger.

Santana smiled widely back and pulled Brittany into a warming hug.

Later that night, a nurse strolled by to check on Brittany. She found the girl and her friend, sleeping huddled up in the bed. A smile spread across her face in seeing how peaceful both of them looked together. Instead of calling security on the tan girl, she carefully closed the door as quietly as she could and walked from the room.

No one disturbed Brittany and Santana's slumber as they dream of each other in the cool night.


	4. Father

**So, this chapter is a little short but it's cute. I may have over done Santana's father as a character but I liked it. Thank you for the reviews and a special thanks to littlemusical, CloudGazer15, Momo30, and Giny gin for the awesome reviews. You guys keep me mega motivated! Enjoy and review!**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
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_"My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it."- Clarence Buddinton Kelland _

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Sunlight flows through the large hospital window and into the room, lighting the blues and whites with shining halos. Santana stirs above Brittany in a deep slumber, snoring so faintly as she slightly drools on the girl's bandage-wrapped chest. Brittany smiles down at the girl, watching her sleep with endearing blue eyes. It's only the crack of dawn but the rising sun is polishing the horizon beyond the shadowed trees. The morning is almost as beautiful as Santana but nothing can compare in Brittany's eyes.

From the other side of the door, Santana's father watches the girls intently. A smile is played across his smooth face as he turns from the charming sight and walks off. Truth is, he didn't mind if his daughter was a lesbian. She can't help who she prefers. He begins to feel bad he even left her at all.

Once Santana was born, her mother became very obsessed with the idea of an ideal child. She always wanted a boy but got Santana. It didn't matter that much, that was until she complained about cheer leading and the color pink. All little Santana wanted to do was roll in the mud and play with her gameboy she never got for Christmas. Her spirits were put down at a very young age and she grew up without ever regaining it. It was like as if she never had spirit.

Her father was not very fond of how his wife became. He felt like he didn't know the woman he married and devoted his life to anymore. Nights he would wake up Santana from her sleep and bring her out to the arcade with Brittany and so get some ice cream afterwards. He was happy she was a beautiful baby girl and wanted for her to only be happy too.

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><p><em>"Wake up, sweety," Santana's father whispered, lightly nudging her little body. <em>

_ The small girl rolled in her bed and groaned, kicking at his arguing hand with her short legs. He chuckled lightly at her then jumped onto the bed. Santana flew up and almost screamed, plopping back onto the bed dizzily. She was about to speak when he started to attack her with tickles._

_ "I'm up!" She insisted, practically crying with laughter._

_ He laughed with her before stopping. Then, he picked her up and swung her lazily over his shoulder. She began to protest and roughly punch his back with her balled fists._

_ "Let me down, ahaha!" She roared out, still laughing giddily. _

_ "Fine, fine," he gave up and shrugged his little girl off his shoulders._

_ She slipped gently to the floor and began to skip around in her favorite Winnie the Pooh onesie with the rubber on the pads of her feet. Brittany crossed her mind, as always, and she turned to pull lightly on his jeans._

_ "Papa, are we gonna get BrittBritt too?" She asked innocently, staring up at her father with puppy eyes._

_ He smiled his famous smirk down to her and she knew she was about to get what she wanted. Santana always loved her dad, he was so nice to her all the time. She felt like he loved her more than mom did and questioned why. Did she do something wrong to mommy? Did mommy just not like her? _

_ "Yaaay! I love BrittBritt!" Santana sang, skipping to the door and eagerly holding it open for her father._

_ She stepped impatiently in place and twirled around once._

_ "Yes, yes. I know you do, sweety," he laughed, hoisting her up again as he walked to the car._

_ Santana threw her open palms up to the young night sky and roared out like a lion. This was her way of claiming herself as Queen of the World, high and mighty placed on top of her father's shoulders. The twinkling stars in the night shining like diamonds thought otherwise. Santana blasted her new Kidz Bop! album in the car as they drove to Brittany's house. _

_ "Papa?" Santana lowly asked, turning down the volume enough to hear._

_ A questioning look passed her father's face and he looked at her for a second then back to the road._

_ "What is it, Santana?" He inquired, a little worried._

_ Little Santana spun the hem of her onesie around her small index finger and looked down at her feet in the dark void below her._

_ "Would- would it be okay if I asked Brittany to marry me?" She replied lightly, her face flushing. "We've been playing pretend for awhile but I thinks it's time we make things official."_

_ Silence filled the car with the exception of the faint annoying kids music. A ridiculous look came across Santana's father's face before he howls out with laughter. He shakes his head to himself and continues driving._

_ "Whaaat?" Santana whines with embarrassment. _

_ He doesn't notice at first before nodding._

_"Wha? Oh, nothing! Yeah, you can make it official," he smiled, looking at his daughter for a second. "How about tonight?"_

_"TONIGHT?" Santana shrieked, slapping her cheeks. "I look so messy, she won't marry me tonight!"_

_ Santana's father smiled oddly, taking in her words before glancing at her again._

_ "Well sure she will! You look beautiful, kid," he insists, gently punching her shoulder with one fist._

_ Santana giggles and rubs her shoulder. Confidence begins to brew inside her._

_ "You know what? I will! It's time for me to take control in this rel-ation. Ship!" Santana sternly spoke with one missing tooth, trying to pronounce the big word. _

_ "Thata girl!" Her father rooted, one first through the open roof of the car, skimming the air brushing his knuckles._

_ For the remaining duration of the ride, Santana bounced anxiously in her seat with her hands clasped in her lap. She reached up to fluff her hair and pat the back of her head to perfection. Internally, she repeated to herself that she could do whatever she wanted in the world and achieve Brittany. _

_ She opened her door slightly as they rolled up to Brittany's driveway quietly. Her father told her to wait until they completely stopped but she ignored him and jumped out of the car. With the rubber under her feet, she padded her way up to the door. She reached to for the door bell until her father stopped her and gripped her little wrist._

_ "No, no! You have to sneak in through the window so her parents won't wake up," he instructed in a sly whisper, leading her over to a window. "Remember, be very quiet!"_

_ She sternly nodded and waited for her father to lightly slide the window open with a pick-lock. It was great the Pierces didn't know how to activate their security at these times. Her father picked her up and helped her through the opening. She slithered in and rolled quietly onto the carpet of the living room._

_ Looking back to her dad, Santana gave him a thumbs up and headed for the stairs silently. It is vitally important for a child from Lima Heights to know how to sneak in places successfully and for these reasons. Crawling carefully up the steps, Santana didn't let one sound loose. She was as quiet as a mouse. _

_ Before she knew it, Brittany's yellow door was towering over her. She leaned up on her tippy toes until she got hold of the knob. Slowly, she turned it and gently pushed the door open. Brittany was fast asleep on her bed with one arm and leg dangling off the side. Her favorite duck onesie clung softly to her body. She was always really tall. _

_ Santana scurried over to her and pounced onto the bed. Brittany was about to let out a startled scream until Santana quickly covered her mouth._

_ "Shhh! We're going to the arcade and I want you to come with me," Santana explained, pulling her hand away from the girl's mouth as she calmed down._

_ Brittany's face lit up before she threw herself into Santana to cuddle her. Santana lightly giggled and hugged back instantly._

_ "Yay! This is gonna be so fun!" Brittany cheered out._

_ Santana smiled and nodded before pulling away from Brittany's iron hold. She let her hand latch onto the blonde's the second they disconnected. They rushed to the living room window where Santana's father waited patiently. His eyes caught them and he smiled, gesturing for them to come over and helping them out._

_ "Hey Britt! You ready for the arcade?" He asked her with an open smile of excitement._

_ "Yeah!" She quickly replied, hugging Santana close to her._

_ The shorter girl's face flushed as she nuzzled into Brittany's chest. The sight was adorable for any parent to see. Santana's father sighed happily at them before he remembered something._

_ "Santana, don't you have something to ask Brittany?" He inquired, looking at his shy daughter. _

_ Santana's eyes went wide and she gulped down her throat deeply. She told herself it was now or never, even though the girl had her whole life ahead of her. Her hands balled into sweaty palmed fists at her sides as the pressure fell onto her. Brittany gave her a comforting and questioning look._

_ "Uhm- yeah, I do. Uhhhh," she began, pulling away from the blonde and itching her own arm. "Brittany?"_

_ "Yeah, San?" Brittany asked sweetly, smiling. _

_ Santana stepped on her own feet and curled her toes. She nibbled down on her bottom lip, looking down. With one deep inhale, she looked back up into Brittany's blue eyes. There could have been a thousand stars in the sky tonight and Santana wouldn't have even noticed. _

_ "Will you marry me?" She finally asked, closing her eyes tightly shut after she finished._

_ Silence roamed around the area. Santana's dad was already back in the car, playing his man music on the radio and waiting for the girls. When the quiet became too much to bare, Santana poked one eye open. Brittany was gazing back at her with a serene smile, her eyes twinkling like a million stars._

_ "Yes," she murmured, scooping in to pick up Santana's little body in a warm embrace._

_ Happiness hit Santana like never before. The dumbest smile spread across her face as she squealed and hugged Brittany back with her arms and legs. Brittany happily twirled them around once before setting Santana down. The Latina gazed up to Brittany with deep chocolate eyes. Brittany smiled back, slowly leaning in to quickly peck Santana on the lips._

_ The moment their lips connected, the universe became one giant firework. A shock ran through both of their small figures before they pulled back to look at each other. Santana stood in shock and ghosted her fingers over her lips. She just had her first kiss. Her first kiss and it was with Brittany! Joy shot up her body in a mega blast._

_ "WHOA!" Brittany breathed out dizzily, spinning around with a silly expression on her face._

_ Santana bashfully giggled before quickly grabbing Brittany's hand and running them over to her dad's car. _

_ "Papa! Papa!" Santana squealed, trailing her blonde wife behind her. _

_ Their hands never broke as they sprinted together. Santana's father looked over to window and saw their hands in a tight hold. He already knew what that meant and smiled. The rubber under their feet padded against the grass as they rushed their way over to jump in the car through the open window. _

_ "Well, how did it go, kiddo?" He asked Santana, seeing she decided to sit in the back with Brittany rather than the front with him._

_ "I am a married woman!" She replied strong and proud. _

_ The rest of that endless night went on in celebration and ring pops with ice cream._

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><p>Santana's father's head fell as he walked. He began to question why he would ever leave his daughter, he should have brought her with him. His wife became insane though, she was on the edge of something too creepy for him. So he just never came home most nights, forgetting about his lovely daughter and her secret love life. Nights he did come home, it was too late and everyone would be fast asleep.<p>

He lost touch of his daughter and still regrets it deeply. She needed him most and he wasn't there. Even now, as she needs him, he's not there. The guilt adds on and weighs down.

Back in the room, Santana wakes on Brittany's chest. Her dark eyes slowly flutter open and adjust to the sunlight. Brittany is still gazing down at her with those endearing blue eyes. She looks up to her and gives her girl the warmest smile in the world.

"Morning, San," Brittany murmurs, ducking her head to gently kiss the girl's forehead.

Santana's body heats at the loving touch and she closes her eyes again. Brittany pulls away to lift Santana's chin up with her finger. They gaze into each other's eyes for a long moment before capturing the other's lips in a slow and tender kiss.

"Morning, Britt," Santana whispers into the kiss.

She breathes in Brittany's sweet fruity scent and bubbles up on the inside. Brittany kisses her again and then tops it off with a peck on the nose. Santana sweetly giggles at Brittany's cuteness.

"I love you so much," she speaks, her voice deeply laced with meaning.

Brittany's head falls to the side as she smiles at Santana.

"I love you, too."


	5. Ginger

**You guys, I did. Even if you're not a gingertana fan keep with the story and have hope. LOL. But, I did. I definitely just did. Enjoy your faces off! Thank you for the reviews! And if you're reading this Claire, GO HOME! :[  
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_I own nothing!_

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_"Hope is some extraordinary spiritual grace that God gives us to control our fears, not to oust them."-Vincent McNabb_

**~#::#::#::#~**

Santana's mother didn't show up today. It wasn't surprising, it is what's expected. Everyone else came today though, including the whole glee club. Brittany's room filled in by early afternoon. Everything was fun and games before the words slipped.

"So Brittany, will you still be able to sing and dance in glee club? Like, we need your talent there," Tina spoke, Santana and Brittany instantly stiffening.

The broken blonde's eyes fell to the pale blue blanket covering her useless legs. Her beautiful face contorted with internal pain and tears. Santana didn't say a word but quickly grabbed Brittany's hand for support. She entwined their fingers, giving her precious blonde a loving squeeze. Brittany tried to swallow back the tears but her attempt showed without the slightest success.

Looks of bewilderment and nervous confusion washed over the crowd's faces. Puck, Rachel, and Quinn averted their eyes to random objects sadly. They're in no position to speak for Brittany, if she wasn't ready, she wasn't ready and they respect that. Blaine even showed up today, holding Kurt's hand since they entered.

"I- won't be dancing again," Brittany finally choked out, reaching up to grab a tight hold of Santana's arm.

Santana let Brittany roughly pull her down to wrap her in a desperate hug. It's heartbreaking and killing Santana but she allows it, she always will. Brittany quivers into the embrace violently, clawing to hold Santana tighter.

"What are you saying?" Artie asks, almost bothered about something.

Santana deeply inhales and looks up at the ceiling. She told herself not to punch him, she can't do that. Not here and sadly not ever. No, she's more mature than that.

"She can't move her legs, Arite. That's what she is saying," she spat out, soothing Brittany's shaking back.

Silence grows like cancer, deadly and painfully. Silent tears falls to the floor from hurt faces and blistering eyes. A great lose had just been declared amongst the valley of friendship and unity. It's going to take every last one of them to comfort not only Brittany but each other. She is the most bright and loving person they know. No one knows what will happen if she dulls down and changes. They can only pray for the best now.

"I'm so sorry," Mike breaks the silence with a meaningful voice, gesturing to everyone around him. "We all are..."

He would always dance with Brittany when they hung out with the Glee club and practiced together. Their friendship is great and strong. At rough times when Brittany couldn't turn to Artie or Santana, she went to him and Tina. They supported her through everything and still do. Brittany is so thankful for that and she knows Santana is too.

Santana is still so struck by everything that happened. She built her whole life around Brittany and almost lost her in that one simple moment. The brush of air from the speeding car still passes Santana when she brings back the horrid memory. An impulse races through her. Her body shakes with adrenaline and need.

"But it's going to be okay because me and San are best friends again," Brittany mumbles into Santana's shoulder blade.

Santana smiles sadly to herself. She still can't come out but she knows she eventually will, for Brittany's sake. Everything is for Brittany, after all. Puck, Quinn, and Rachel all shared disappointing looks. Santana doesn't know Brittany is waiting for her to speak up and announce their relationship. Brittany waits for nothing.

The rest of the day is spent with condolences and comfort. It's joyful for a time. Until, one by one, everyone beings to file out of the room by the time visiting hours is over. Santana lingers by Brittany's side, holding her hand in a tight grip.

"Santana, I think it's time for you to go," Brittany mumbles, gazing down at their entwined hands.

Santana suddenly pulls her back slightly to comprehend the blonde's words. She is finally here and with Brittany and now the girl wants to just push her away? Something isn't right here.

"Britt, what's wrong?" Santana asked, her free hand reaching up to cup Brittany's cheek.

Before Santana can hold her face, Brittany whips her head to the side and harshly avoids the contact. Santana hesitates but then drops her hand to her side loosely.

"You still can't tell them," Brittany states between her teeth, not turning back to the Latina.

Right away Santana knew what was going down. She made her past mistake again, the one she never learns from. Brittany lets their hands slip apart and Santana already feels the emptiness. She's going to be mature and give Brittany time. Not too much, though.

"I'm sorry. I just can't," Santana offers before turning to the door. "Text me when you want me here. If not, I'll be back in two days. I won't wait any longer than that."

Santana is out of the room, leaving her words to lurk around Brittany's mind. Tears stream down the blonde's cheeks the moment she hears the slam of the door. She's hurt though, even after all they've been through, Santana still can't just make them official. What is the worst that could happen?

Walking down the hallway as casually as she can, Santana holds her head up high. Her father watches her the way. Noticing she left Brittany's room makes him nervous, knowing all too well what was happening. Each of Santana's strong strides are fake and he can see that clearly; he can see right through his daughter. Santana's wall can't be passed by many, but her father is one of those special few that can break it through.

"Have a good day," the lady at the front desk calls to Santana before she's gone. "You look like you need it..."

Snow crunches below Santana's steps as she makes her way down the blanketed sidewalk. Around her the world is glimmering with the millions of unique ice crystals creating sheets of glossy white to cover the land. She reminds herself white is nothing, not a color but a shade. White consists of no colors, white is the absence of all colors. Black consists of all colors, black is everything.

Santana wonders if Brittany imagines the world in black and white; one major or the other. Brittany sees all the colors, but her thoughts are the figments that are black and white. Maybe the fact she won't admit their relationship makes it not even exist, makes it as white as the snow. Therefore, if she is to admit to their love, it could be black. Their love could be everything.

Before her thoughts can get any deeper, Santana pushes it all away and takes in her surroundings. Where did she even walk to? Monkey bars, swings, trees- she is at the old oak playground. She sighs to herself, thinking about how this is the last place she wanted to be during the night.

"Don't you look stunning tonight?"

Santana's breath hitches and her body instantly stiffens. The voice, that _stench, _is too familiar and close. Little hairs on the back of her neck stick up. It's the jock that tried to take advantage of her at the party. He is right behind her.

"Leave me alone," she whispers, trying to play it cool.

A chuckle rolls down her back from his uncomfortably hot breath. She shivers at the unwanted attention. He reached up a hand and twirls a black lock of her hair.

"I don't think I will. You're an open opportunity."

Santana looks around desperately. She's all alone with the exception of the horny jock. The swings sway silently in the night's breeze. Hope crashes to the snow.

"I will break your nuts if you try anything," she spits out like fire.

He simply laughs louder before roughly grabbing her elbow. Santana's not strong enough, she can't shove him away. She's helpless. Leaning in, he draws out his tongue and sloppily licks it over her neck to lay slick circles. Santana's eyes close tightly and she cries out.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" He roars, palming her jaw shut.

Tears well up in her eyelashes as she kicks and scratches but its useless. Before she knows it, she is on the cold snow and getting pinned by his large body from above. He begins to reach for his jean's zipper. This wouldn't be happening if Santana was still with Brittany. She has never felt so much regret.

Suddenly, a sharp swift of air passes Santana's face and a scream can be heard from the jock. He rolls off her and holds onto his punctured side in a painful cradle. Santana slowly begins to open her eyes and awaits her knight in shining armor.

Hey dark eyes look up to meet a face never met before. It's a girl, appearing about her age or younger, standing tall with long, luscious ginger tresses. The dull street lights emit a deep rimming around her rosy cheeks and crystallizes her evergreen eyes. Her stance is fierce and protective over Santana.

"Who the fu-?" The jock begins, but gets cut off by her heel to his iron chin.

Blood squirts out his lips as his head whips to the side from the impact. Crimson red mixes into the white snow, adding color. Santana watches the red seep into the white with thoughtful eyes.

"You better get the fuck away from her before I bust your dick!" The beautiful ginger girl threatens.

The jock scrambles to his feet with two slipping mess ups. When he is finally up, he darts out of the area. Disappearing into the darkness, he exits. Santana stares up at the beautiful stranger in awe. The girl looks back at her and gives her a sweet smile with her pink petal lips.

"Hey, my names Marissa," she introduces herself, lending her hand out to Santana.

The Latina stares at the offered hand. The light still rims the long, slender fingers presented before her. After a second of realizing her idiot appearance, Santana pulls herself together and accepts the hand with her own. Marissa's hold is warm and comforting; it's lovely.

"Uhhhh, thank you. Like, a lot," Santana begins, not knowing how to thank anyone before. "How can I repay you..."

Marissa's laugh is cute. She smiles at the almost awkward Latina with an adoring charm.

"You can start with your name," she says adorably.

Santana bites her tongue and curses herself for being so dumbfound. What was her name again?

"Santana," she instantly replies. "Santana Lopez."

Marissa gives Santana a look up and down. Santana watches with wide eyes. The girl's intentions somehow come out more innocent than sexual.

"I really like that name, Santana," she smiles, making Santana shiver at her own name.

Santana swallows loudly and rocks back on her feet. For once in her life, she doesn't know what to do. This girl came out of the blue- no, out of the black. She saved her like it was her job and appears so chill about it. Santana can't even say thank you to that last comment because her mind is off elsewhere.

"Sooo, how can I repay you?" She finally asks, breaking the silence before it grew noticeable.

A glint flares in those deep green eyes and Santana still doesn't know how to react.

"Well, I'm new here. I just moved from Canada and I could use a friend before I start school Monday," she winks to Santana playfully.

Little relief washes over Santana in finding the girl didn't want any dirty favors, seeming at first that she might have. Though, she probably wouldn't regret it with this ginger beauty. Brittany's face flashes Santana's thoughts and she straightens herself in place.

"Haha, sure. You know what? I'm not doing anything right now. We can just chill here," Santana offers, coolly smiling and walking over to the monkey bars.

Marissa raises her brow in seeing the tan girl's sudden change in character. Just a second ago, she was on the floor about to get raped. Now, though, she looks strong and confident. Marissa begins to wonder how many masks this Santana holds.

"Oh, I have all the time in the world. My parents are never even home," she pitifully laughs to herself.

Santana gives Marissa a look as she climbs up the bars and swings over the top to perch herself up on the sturdy metal. She pats the space next to her.

"I know how it feels. My dad totally left me cause my ma is a bitch," she explains, helping Marissa up to sit next to her. "He still supports the family, though. He just ain't home too much."

Marissa listens to her intently, gazing into her eyes deeply. They don't realize their hands are still touching until Santana is finished and there's a short silence. At the same time, they draw away with a faint blush and small apology.

Santana finds herself looking to Marissa so carefully and preciously. She's amazed by how gorgeous this new girl looks tonight, truly a knight in shining armor; princess in a glittering gown. BRITTANY. Santana thinks of Brittany again and averts her eyes to the trees, kicking her feet absently. She's in love with Brittany. That doesn't mean she could be Marissa's friend.

"That blows," Marissa comments, bashfully pulling at her hair and trying to think of conversation.

Out in the empty streets, Quinn walks silently. She always does things like this, walking at night or hanging at cemeteries. It's what makes her Quinn, secretly. A conversation hits her ears and curiosity drags her out of her designed path. She finds she's walking to the old oak park. She also finds Santana with some new chick.

"Hey, Santana!" Quinn calls, waving her hand and giving the mystery girl an off glare.

Quinn knows where Santana belongs, with Brittany. So, who the hell was this girl?

"Oh, hey Quinn," Santana pulls out awkwardly. "What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same," Quinn instantly replied, giving Santana a look then glancing at the ginger.

Marissa sat in amusement and accepts her new challenge. She assumes this angry blonde is Santana's friend or something. She also looks like a fierce bitch.

"I'm new, my names Marissa," she intervenes, smiling coyly down to Quinn. "I just ran into Santana here and made a friend to start school with."

Quinn looks at the girl then to Santana. Santana gives her the I-gotta-talk-to-you-later look and nods off. Quinn isn't pleased by this.

"My names Quinn," she replies, hoping the girl doesn't hear her.

"Nice to meet you, Quinn!" She cheerfully grins, craning her head.

Quinn makes an obviously fake smile to the girl and stared back at Santana with wide eyes. She won't be forgetting this encounter anytime soon.


	6. Regret

**There is a war going down right now between Gingertana and Brittana. COOL IT, OKAY? Let's be reasonable here.**** Brittany was with Artie, why can't Santana get with someone else for awhile? Not saying anything will go down in this story, I'm talking bout the show. I like Gingertana because it's realistic. I ain't spending my whole life with my best friend since birth. But Brittana is endgame so... Just enjoy and review!**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
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_"Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future."- Fulton Oursler_

**~#::#::#::#~**_  
><em>

Dawn fires over the horizon, highlighting a new day with a deep orange tint. Last night is a blur, spent in conversations between Quinn, Marissa, and Santana. Angry tension radiated off the blonde and the ginger for the entire duration. Marissa didn't seem to mind too much, but Quinn is clearly not a fan of her. She could be plotting her perfect murder now for all they know.

Santana made it home when her mother was fast asleep in her room. She didn't bother to check herself in, she simply slumped up into her room and onto her bed. Heavy with sleep, she shut her eyes and let herself peacefully sink into nice memories she and Brittany shared together. They came so vivid and sharp, it felt like she was there. She will never forget the feeling of their first real kiss, not their engagement one as little kids. They were both twelve and carefree in Lima, Ohio that one unforgettable night.

* * *

><p><em>Santana had a big sleepover with all the Cheerios for her birthday. It was warm out but in a very comfortable, content way. The rest of the Cheerios were deep in sleep, though Brittany and Santana were wide awake. <em>

_ "San?" Brittany asked under her breath._

_ Santana sat up in her blanket on the floor and scanned the area for Brittany. Her hair was a mess so she had to hold it up with a hand as she looked. She found the blonde situated right behind her, looking at her with puppy eyes while playing with her thumbs. Innocence emitted off Brittany as she sat, looking so vulnerable before Santana._

_ "What is it, Britt?" Santana questioned, before dropping her hand from her hair. "I don't have to tell you another story about unicorns, do I?"_

_ Brittany gave a small smile but shook her head. Santana sighed with relief, her creativity had been dying out over time with all these stories. The more realistic life became, the more she found Brittany getting confused with things. Brittany needed stories with extra creativity, gravity doesn't exists to her in tales. _

_ "I, uhm, I have another present for you," Brittany mumbled, deeply blushing. "Sort of."_

_ Santana looks at the girl with a reassuring smile. No matter what Brittany gives her, as long as it has meaning, she will cherish it. To this day, Santana still has her matching duck bracelet Brittany got her so people knew they were inseparable. She just didn't know Brittany thought of it as a wedding ring. _

_ "Really? Cool! What is it?" Santana asks eagerly, grabbing Brittany's hands._

_ Brittany looks around at all the other girls asleep. She wants this to be really special and just between them. The special part gets stressed._

_ "Uhm, come with me," Brittany says, winding her pinky around Santana's and pulling her along with her._

_ Santana doesn't object. To be honest, she kind of enjoyed when Brittany took command. It made her feel protected and not the only one trying in their dear friendship. Brittany can be independent at times, just not all the time._

_ "Uhm, let's go to your front steps," Brittany decides thoughtfully before dragging Santana along._

_ Santana simply giggled and lets the energy of an anticipated surprise rush through her. Anything was possible at the time. Brittany gently directs Santana where to sit so she can sit right across from her. Santana can only wonder what Brittany was up to._

_ "C-close your eyes, though," Brittany weakly demands, stammering with her words as she attempt not to look shy. _

_ Santana closes her eyes on command. For a moment, Brittany gazed at her friend. Her eyes looked into every detail in Santana's face, trying as hard as she could to memorize the moment. Adrenaline pulses in rough pumps through Brittany as she leans her face closer to Santana's. She forced herself to go through with it, she wanted to; she needed to. _

_ Santana's body gets set when she feels Brittany's smooth breaths caressing her lips. They're so __close to each other, it's becoming unbearable. Before Brittany can even think, Santana closes the dwindling space between them and captured Brittany's lips in a searing kiss. She's the one shocked when she finds Brittany kissing back immediately. Brittany's reaching into Santana's hair already and the Latina has no complaints as she deepens the kiss. _

_ They're tingling with joy and fiery excitement through the whole contact. Santana feels different, though. She's kissed Puck before but it never felt like this. This kiss feels so meaningful and softly caring. Santana pulls back in a haze._

_ "Brittany?" She asks, seeing the girl has yet to open her eyes. _

_ Brittany quivers from the after shock before gradually opening her eyes. She gazes at Santana in awe and silent amazement._

_ "Mmm?" She draws out her reply finally._

_ Santana looks down at her crossed legs before carefully back up to Brittany._

_ "Have you ever been kissed before this?"_

_ Brittany froze on the spot. Of course she'd never been kissed, she thought Santana and her were going to wait and share their first kiss. Heavy disappointment weighs her body and she tries not to make it noticeable._

_ "No," she can't lie to Santana._

_ Santana nods her head and averts her eyes to the side. She couldn't help but feel victory soar inside her with a fiery blaze. Looking back to Brittany, she smiles._

_ "Well," she began, carefully taking Brittany's hand and making the girl look at her. "You were perfect."_

_ Brittany's toothy smile stretches like a giddy child before she pounces into Santana for a choking hug. Santana laughs at the girl's energy and tightly hugs back. That was the best present she ever received in her life so far. She only wish she had never kissed Puck; Brittany should have been her first kiss. _

_ "Thank you, Britt," she smiles into the girl's skin. _

_ Brittany can only nod in response as she holds Santana closer through the warm, starry night._

* * *

><p>"SANTANA!" The girl's mother called out from downstairs.<p>

Santana rolled her eyes and threw her body out of bed. She was taken aback when she noticed she didn't sleep and spent a whole night thinking over everything about Brittany. A smile finds her face anyway, that is her favorite way to spend a lonely night. She also found herself spending most nights like that when Brittany was with Artie. Those times were really rough on her.

"WHAT MAMI!" Santana shouts back, slipping on some loose sweats and a baggy sweater.

She tried to shove her leg through a hole, but ended up slipping and crashing to the floor. She hisses in pain before sighing at her little awareness. Mornings will never be a good thing for her; not without Brittany cuddled by her side.

"WE'RE GOING TO THE ICE RINK TODAY, GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!"

Santana's eyes went wide. Who the fuck did this woman think she was? Santana had always wanted to go to the ice rink since she was five and now it doesn't even matter. That's just great, she thinks to herself. The woman cares at least a little.

Slumping down the steps, Santana makes her way to the kitchen and sits herself at the table in her usual seat. Fruit loops stare her in the face, awaiting to be eaten. She looks down at the cereal bowl oddly.

"Ma, what is this for?" She asks, shooting a skeptical look at her mother.

The woman smiles back and walks over to ruffle her daughter's hair. Santana swatted her hand away annoyed to fix her hair again.

"You eat it, Mija," she laughs, trying to lighten the mood.

Santana gives her mother the Are-You-Kidding dead look. Her stomach growls right then, at the worst moment. She glares down at the cereal in hungry frustration.

"I said, you eat it."

"Got you the first time," Santana shoots back, picking up her spoon. "You don't need to watch me, ma."

"Just checking," her mother smiles, turning back to the dishes. "When you're done make yourself presentable for today. We're going to bonding and ice skating!"

Santana almost choked on the colorful cereal in her mouth. She didn't want to bond with her mother at a time like this. Brittany needs her! Her last conversation with Brittany hits her head. She weighs down slightly, feeling horrible how she felt Brittany like that. This time around, she's going to be patient and loyal to Brittany. No matter what happens she will be at her blonde's side, nothing can separate them now. If Brittany doesn't want Santana right now, it's understandable. She knows she will be there soon, anyway.

Finishing the cereal before it sogs in the milk, Santana gets up and places it in the sink. Her mother gives her a smile, thinking to herself she's doing a good job bonding. She is forgetting Santana isn't a little girl anymore. Her daughter is out of sight and up in her room before she can speak a word.

Santana storms into her room and throws herself onto the bed- again. She's so emotionally exhausted and it's only been adding on. On top of everything, her mother wants to acknowledge her presence for once. How can this get any worse?

She stuck with that thought for a moment. This can't get any worse now, right? It can only get better. A light bulb lights up above Santana's head. She instantly reaches out for her cell phone and scrolls through her contacts. Brittany hasn't texted her yet. No matter, she'll be there in another day if she doesn't text. Santana refuses to leave Brittany's side for too long.

Quinn and Puck's name finally came up on the light rectangle screen. Her thumbs begin tapping hastily.

[_heyy its me :) get your ass over to the ice rink cuz ma wants to bond with me and I will not die alone_]-S

Santana sat on her bed, impatiently kicking her feet as she waits on a reply. She just notices how dark her room is. When Brittany gets out of the hospital they should redecorate or something. Anything to send time together. Suddenly, a vibrate came from the cell phone with it's screen lighting up.

[_wow that blows. youu can count on me being there for ya babe ;)_]-Q

Smiling down to the text, Santana knows she can always count on Quinn. They've gotten really close ever since New York. Nothing like a strong, rekindled friendship to help you cope with life tragedies. It's good they have each other's back too, just to have someone there. Santana got another text.

[_I broke my ass last time I went fucking ice skating. Im in_]-P

Santana had to laugh at Puck's response. He always had an injury for something. Nothing seems to stop him, though. Santana wonders how he does it sometimes. She shakes her head and gets on a decent pair of attire.

[_thnx guys xxoo_]-S

"Alright, let's go!" Santana calls to her mom as she runs down the stairs and out the door.

The woman turns around with an odd look in seeing her daughter's sudden excitement and energy. She shrugs it off and heads out for the car. Her daughter is already seated in the passenger side, one arm dangling out the window.

"PICK UP THE PACE!"

Santana's mother frowns at her daughter's tone but gets in the car without complaint. She starts it up and begins to drive smoothly through the opposing snow. Silence fills the car, as always.

"How is Brittany?"

Santana froze in her seat. Her heart aches when she hears the beautiful girl's name and she can only wonder what she's doing now. Slowly, she brings her arm back into the car and lays it on her lap.

"She's good," Santana says thoughtfully. "Wanted some space..."

Santana's mom laughs and shakes her head.

"No kidding, you're suffocating the poor girl," she chuckles.

Santana frowns at her mom, she knows she's only saying that because she doesn't like when they're together. Even as Brittany is in a hospital, she still isn't fond of the time they share. Just goes to show how cruel she can slyly be.

"Whatever," Santana grunts, looking out the window again.

For a second, Santana sees no color. Black and white fills her vision as everything blurs. Then, in a sudden breath, the color returns. Santana gasps and brings a hand to her chest. She really can't get Brittany off her mind. That and she desperately needs to rest.

They're at the ice skating rink before she knows it. Slight excitement flys through Santana because she always wanted to go here nonetheless, even if it was her mother's poor excuse for daughter-mother time. The air is cool as it soars into her opening door. She steps out, breathing in and taking in her surroundings.

"You ready?" Her mother asks, walking over to her.

Santana nods a little too excitedly. She ignored the hand her mother tries to hold her with; she doesn't need to be treated like a child again. Those days are over, but now she wishes she can do anything to get them back. They head in, renting themselves a pair of skates and buying their admission into the arena. Santana awkwardly stumbles around as she attempts to stabilize her balance.

"_Jesus," _she hisses, clinging to the nearest railing she could spot.

Her mother watches her with amusement. She had to admit, her daughter grew up beautifully. They eventually make their way over to the rink and step out onto the slippery ice.

"I'm going to fall and break my ass," Santana tells herself, grabbing her mother's coat so she wont die.

"Hey!" She laughs, tugging her daughter's grip off her.

"WAIT!" Santana screams before she begins to slide straight into the crowd. "OH SHIT!"

She tightly clamps her eyes shut and prays to God not to kill anyone. Just as she prays, she is ignored and rams into a thin figure. They both collide but the stranger grips Santana's arms and lets them slide carefully. Santana grips them back tighter and screams.

"Oh fuck, I am so sorry!" Santana quickly apologizes with a desperate voice, leaning into the stranger still for balance.

Marissa looks at her, her green eyes mixing with Santana's dark chocolate ones. Santana stares back for a second. It's her savior, _again. _This girl is really on a roll.

"Oh, hey Marissa," she tries to smile with her apology and incredible embarassment.

Marissa laughs and playfully swats Santana's arm.

"Watch it next time!" She chuckles heartidly. "Hey, have you ever done this before?"

Santana recalls the girl saying she was from Canada and shakes her head. Of course she's never ice skated before, they're in Ohio. Canada, on the other hand...

"No," Santana replies with a cool laugh. "It's pretty fucking scary though."

Marissa gives her a warm grin, a glint flaring in her eyes. Santana watches for those things, they're like atomic bombs.

"I could teach you," she whispers suggestively, trailing her hands down to hold Santana's delicately.

"SANTANA!"

Santana pulls her lips into her mouth and prays for forgiveness. Quinn and Puck awkwardly slide their path over to them, ready to interupt the ginger at any given chance. She internally kicks herself for inviting them. Marissa is like her guardian angel, she should have known the girl would have shown up one way or the other.

"Ohhhhh, hey guys. Uh, Puck this is Marissa. She's new," Santana explains, carfeully turning to them and gesturing to the pretty ginger. "She already met Quinn..."

Puck gives the girl a once over with his eyes. She is pretty, that's for sure. Brittany can't be thrown away, though. Brittany is him and Quinn main priority for Santana. This chick is getting in the way.

"Yo," he quickly spoke, wrapping one arm around Quinn casually.

Quinn's face twisted with disguist before she shoves him off her.

"Watch yourself, Noah!" She yells as he slides away helplessly.

Marissa and Santana laugh at the sight of the two. They grew into a close friendship after New York just like Santana and Quinn. Santana sees Quinn with Rachel a lot more often and she grows skeptical at times. Nothing too serious for notice, though.

"It's great to see you again, Quinn," Marissa smiles at the blonde who fakes one back.

Santana looks around for her mother, almost forgetting she is here too. Dissapointment breaks through her when she finds her with some random guy mingling on the side. She should have figures with would've happened, it always does. Nothing is going to change that woman. Santana considers, this and everything else that has happened so far. Why is she the one so afraid and making herself change? It's not fair.

"You too, uhhh," Quinn begins, looking around thoughtfully. "What's your name again?"

"Mariss-"

"Right."

Marissa stands awkwardly and nods to herself while biting the side of her lip, accepting the hate she's getting. She knows she can't change anyone's opinion of her but she really likes Santana as a friend and just would love for her to like her back too. Just as friends, though. Santana smiles reassuringly at her and nudges her side. Marissa can't help but smile back at the Latina. Quinn glares at them.

"I'm back!" Puck calls out, grinning like a fool as he glides over to them like a professional.

Everyone arches a brow at him, seeing he already seems to have mastered the art of ice skating. Puck is such a mystery.

"I- should go. I'm sorry for annoying you guys," Marissa draws out, loosely letting go of Santana. "I get no one likes the ginger new kid from Canada..."

Santana slips around when Marissa pulls away. She reaches out and grabs the girl again in a pleading hold. Marissa looks at Santana sadly, knowing her other friends don't want her here. She feels uncomfortable and insecure. This is just adding to all the other times in her life she has felt insecure and alone, resulting in her anorexity. Some of her bones are faintly visible from all the damage these unwanted feeling setting in has caused over the years.

"Stay," Santana orders, looking straing into her eyes.

Marissa shakes her head with the smallest sad smile. She just really wants Santana to be her friend...

"I- gotta go home now, actually," she chokes out, trying to keep her voice strong.

Santana can see right through the girl, she's broken. Brittany needs her though, she can't be there for two people at once. Since when is she, Santana Lopez, so damn caring?

Marissa pulls away more forcefully this time and glides off gracefully. Her body is quivering though and it's obvious shes holding back a sob. Santana stands on the ice, mad as ever.

"The fuck is your deal, Fabray?" She spits, ashamed of the blonde.

Quinn tried to find the words but can't. Puck just begins to slide around them, being cocky with his new skills. Santana is furious at Quinn, how could she act so childish?

"I'm fucking leaving that is it. Oh, and by the way Quinn, before you came last night Marissa saved me from being raped," Santana explains harshly, awkwardly walking her way off the rink. "I hope you're fucking happy with yourself for once."

Quinn stands on the ice in defeat as Puck still circles around her. She watches Santana walk to her mom, tell her something, then walk away. Her mother tries to talk to her but she holds up a hand and leaves. Santana's gone just like that.

"Yooouuu fucked up," Puck sang, being the obvious jerk he is.

Quinn didn't know what to think. Santana wouldn't lie about something like that, it is way too serious of a topic. She wants to kick herself right now.

"Yeah," she whispers. "I did."


	7. Going Back

**Before we start I hope everyone knows Marissa is actually a real person. She was on the Glee Project and a famous tweet of her's sparked the whole gingertana war. Just in case, I added links at the end of this chapter for you guys. You may want to give her a chance, she really is beautiful. Enjoy and review! **

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
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_"Acceptance and tolerance and forgiveness, those are life-altering lessons."- Jessica Lange_

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Nightfall comes sooner than Quinn expects, darkening the sky with a starless blanket. A shiver runs up her spine as Santana's words echo over in her head repeatedly. She didn't mean to be so cruel to this new ginger, she just wants to stand up for Brittany. Since childhood, Santana and Brittany have been in such a relationship that she couldn't let it all go to waste. She kind of wants to see them together for herself, too.

Praying for the girl to be there, she makes it into the old oak park and looks around. The monkey bars are desolate tonight. Sighing, she walks over to the rusty set of swings instead. All she knew for sure is that she has to have a talk with this girl- and soon.

"Quinn, what are you doing here?"

The blonde instantly sits up on the swing and looks around. Marissa is there, sitting on the end of the firetruck red slide on the playground. Relief washes down her with a thankful sigh.

"Marissa, I've been looking for you," Quinn explains with a small but honest smile.

The ginger gives her a skeptical look.

"You're not going to kill me, are you?" She asks, hands gripping the sides of the slide.

Quinn laughs at the girl a little while shaking her head. She's not that cruel of a person. In fact, ever since she started hanging out with Rachel, things have really changed with her. Maybe too many things.

"No, I just need to talk to you. It's about Santana," she offers, patting the empty swing beside her.

Marissa's eyes go wide but she gets up. Something doesn't feel right to her. Quinn's got a look like she's gambling for something and something good. Now that the topic is about Santana, she has the upper hand too. Santana's friends don't understand though, Marissa simply wants to be Santana's friend.

She takes a seat next to Quinn and lazily spins her swing in slow, absent motions.

"I'm listening," Marissa points out when Quinn gets really quiet.

Quinn glances at her then her hands. She's looking for the perfect words. Nothing is perfect, though.

"Yeah, well, I honestly don't know where to begin. You see," Quinn draws out carefully. "Santana has this friend- her names Brittany- and they're like really close. Ever since they were little, they've had this connection I have never seen before. Not even in movies. But, it's obvious they're in love and Brittany just got hit by a car at this party a few nights ago. She _is _alive- but she _was _a dancer. She can't move her legs anymore and the fact that Santana isn't with her right now and is with you isn't right..."

Marissa listens to the girl intently, taking every word in carefully. She didn't know Santana likes girls. Not that she minds, she just didn't know. Quinn doesn't stop her explanation for a long while, word after word about how close these two are and that she can't separate them. Marissa isn't the bad guy here, she never meant anything to anyone. She never did...

Eventually, Quinn stops for a breath. She looks over to Marissa, making sure the girl had listened to at least one word. Marissa is looking right back at her with a reassuring smile.

"It's totally fine. I'm not looking for a relationship, just a friendship. Santana needed help and I was there," Marissa sums up, averting her eyes to the black sky. "I'm just trying to work the new kid thing here _and _being a ginger on top of that."

Quinn smiles at the girl's visible exhaustion. She looks like she's been through some rough times herself. Brittany needs Santana now, though. Quinn may not know what went down, seeing she isn't with her right now, but she knows Santana will be there. Marissa just seemed an obvious threat at the time but she never really was.

"Okay," Quinn says with a small smile. "I'm just looking out for my friends here."

Marissa nods, getting up.

"I'm going home now," she explains, pointing at the sky. "It's getting dark out."

Quinn nods too, getting up. Marissa starts leaving already and the blonde feels the need to say something. She just doesn't know what.

"See you around," she instantly blurts out.

Marissa stops in her steps and turns to look at Quinn. She has a wide smile on her face with bright eyes. Maybe she means it, Marissa doesn't know for sure. Maybe she's just being nice and pretending, like everyone else.

"Yeah, see you around," she gives back, leaving for her home.

Quinn walks a little slower than most nights. She looks around her and absorbs the cold winter air. Everything seems to be going a little slower now that Brittany's damaged. Nothing operates right without her, she's like the sun.

Santana is sitting on the couch, not really watching the television. Her phone is tightly clutched in her hand, anticipating a message from Brittany at any moment. She waits for nothing. There is a light sound and faint steps can be heard walking into the house. Santana automatically got up.

"Who the hell is that?" She shouted, getting herself ready for anything.

A cool silence passes. Another cold inhale.

"You're father..."

Santana's heart almost stopped. He hasn't come home in months now. Seeing him at the hospital is painful enough. Her careful stance dropped though she doesn't seem too happy at all.

"What do you want," she spat out, glaring at her father's dark figure.

He stepped into the dim light with an unreadable face. Santana warily watches him, silently not letting him get any closer.

"Brittany is alone," he pointed out, not happy at Santana either. "Why aren't you with her?"

Santana felt a couple of emotions all at once. Happiness, her father cared that she wasn't with Brittany. Sadness, she wasn't with Brittany. Hatred, her father left her. Respect, he still cared after all this time.

"She got a little mad at me," she explains, looking down at her feet.

Her father slapped a hand onto his face, then looked directly at her.

"Santana, get your sorry ass in the car," he ordered, a playful tone hinted in his voice. "We have a lot to talk about. You give me your bullshit that you don't love Brittany, then I won't help you sneak into the hospital too."

He simply walked out the door, leaving his daughter in shock just like that. Santana stood paralyzed. He definitely knew- knows. Only thing is, he isn't pissed at her. He isn't trying to throw her away into some church school to teach her lessons on nothing and that she should burn in hell. No, he's actually trying to support her.

Unsure of anything, Santana walks out to the door and sees her father waiting for her in the car. For a moment, she can see her little self running for the car to get Brittany and go to the arcade. Now, she's standing there, having gone through torment for the past days and heading for the car to get Brittany at the hospital. Step after careful step, she walks to the car.

Opening the passenger door, she feels so tall. The last time she opened this door she had to pounce and plop into the seat. Now, she simply steps a foot in a drops onto the seat like nothing. Where had all the fun gone?

"So, tell me everything," he begins, turning to Santana. "This car isn't moving until I know what's going on."

She cringes away from him a little and rests her back on the window. Taking a deep inhale, she searches through all the memories. Every breath, touch, smile, laugh, embrace, kiss. She found the simplest way to sum everything up.

"I love her," she shrugs, defeated. "I love her more than anything and I want to be with her. She wanted us to go public but I couldn't. Mom would kill me. I still can't now, even while she's in the hospital. She can't even fucking move her legs anymore!"

Tears form in Santana's eyes as she recalls everything. All those years flying past her in a harsh blow. Santana's father watches her with a careful look, taking in the words as they came to him. He takes a deep inhale of his own.

"Whatever, you will explain more later," he says, turning into the road. "I'm sneaking you in with Brittany now."

Santana laughs, despite everything.

"I can just go in tomorrow morning, you know?" She offers.

He frowns at the road.

"Yeah, I know. But she asked for you. I think she's sleeping now but I told her I'd get your ass over there," he says, shocking Santana in her seat. "She said something about not being able to reach for her phone..."

Santana cursed at herself under her breath and internally too. Of course Brittany couldn't reach for her phone, she can't even get out of the fucking bed! Santana clearly didn't think her shit through. Everything has been happening all at once, the pressure is driving her insane.

"You know she has one more day then she's out and home again," her father informs her suggestively, lifting his brow.

Santana gives her father a look. No, he couldn't be talking about that. This isn't happening.

"Papa, I get your like a free spirit and shit. But I don't think you need to know my fucking sex life," she deadpans, looking out the window. "Not like I will be getting pregnant in the near future."

He laughs and shakes his head. Of course he has to tell his daughter these things, he is her dad! He might not be a strict as other dads may be, but he does need to know what happens in his daughter's life.

"Okay, okay. I get it," he begins, then looks off thoughtfully. "I want to tell you something, but I don't know how to put it..."

Santana chuckles at her father. There hasn't been anything yet he can't be able to say shamelessly. What could he possibly be trying to get across?

"She still knows," he looks off, then back to the road while grinding his teeth thoughtfully. "When she needs to take a leak."

"_PAPA!_"

He jumps in his seat and clutches the wheel. Then he leans back slightly and howls with laughter. He should have expected this. Not knowing his daughter to well, he sometimes doesn't know what to think. This topic is one too awkward, though.

"How the hell else was I supposed to tell you?" He laughs with an admitting shrug. "I am a doctor, you know."

Santana's swats his side, though there's a small smile playing on her face. Her father _really _did look out for her. He is a shameless doctor and sticks to that loyal title. She can only wonder his reputation at the hospital.

"You're gross," she says, laughing towards the window.

"And you're getting it in."

"_PAPA SHUT UP HOLY SHIT!_"

With that, they rolled up to the hospital. Adrenaline shot through Santana as she thought of her beautiful Brittany. She was just a few doors away. Totally forgetting about their really awkward conversation, Santana leaped out of the car.

"Hey, wait! I have to walk you in," her dad called, walking out to her side and locking the car.

She sighed and waited, jumping in spot impatiently. He smiled at his daughter and opened the door to show her way. Santana shot him a thankful smile as she stepped in. The lady at the front desk looked over at Santana with an odd look until she caught sight of the girl's father. She rolled her eyes at him but let them in nonetheless.

"Thank you!" Santana called out before darting for the elevator.

She bashed in the 'up' button with her thumb and licked her lips. This elevator really needs to come fast or she might blow up. Slowly, the machine came down. A beep rang, indicating the elevator is here. Santana burst into the gradually opening metal doors.

"Shit," she hissed. "Uhhh, what was it again? Floor B, right"

Quickly clicking the button, she laid back on the railing. A sigh of relief left her, impressed at herself that she remembered the room. So much has been going through her head lately. Some sleep will help cool her nerves.

_Ding!_

The metal doors slowly open and Santana is out in the hallway. She hates the gross hospital odor that fills the air and can't be more thankful to Rachel for giving Brittany those scented candles. Brittany, she thinks. Brittany is so pretty.

Floating to the blonde's door with the face of a drooling schoolboy, she gently pushes it open and closes it behind her. Brittany is asleep on her pale blue bed looking troubled, her face contorted with a lonely discomfort. Santana smiles dearly at the needy blonde as she carefully walks her way over. She positions herself so delicately on the bed as not to wake the beauty. Successful with her mission, she cuddles under and up the blonde's chest and rests her cheek where her heart is.

There's a light beat, growing louder before settling down again. A playful grin grows on Santana's face because she knows it's her prescence that makes the other girl's heart do that. She can't ask for more in her life than that.

"Sweet dreams, Brittany," she whispers, closing her eyes and letting her dreams take her elsewhere.

That night, Santana Lopez got one of the most peaceful rests in her life. Brittany got freed from her nightmare. Quinn stayed awake, thinking over everything that happened. Puck snored louder than ever. Rachel dreamed of Quinn. Marissa, though, sits alone in her barren room and hopes to see Santana again. Her parents are never home, she has nothing but the girl she saved.

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><p><strong>soooooo my links didn't work... just google Marissa Von Bleicken she is adorable and amazing. she tweeted about taking Santana if Britt didn't but not with those exact words. JUST LOOK IT UP. DO IT.<br>**


	8. No Longer A Temptaion

**Wow, sadly this is the shortest chapter yet. It will be the shortest chapter ever though. It's my birthday today and I just wanted to get a little present in for all of you. ****I understand now that no one likes Marissa (and even though I personally love her) I altered the whole story a bit JUST so you're happy. You guys really don't want Marissa anywhere near Santana, when really she saved the girl from being raped. It makes me think you want Santana raped? LMFAO, oh well. Not hapening. Maybe I'll just... kill her off? Marissa, I mean. No more ginger? Ehhhhh, we will see. Enjoy and review!**** I'm not testing how cruel Brittana fans can get or anything ;) Remember! I'm keeping them in character. Ryan Murphy tends to be unrealistic with them. A lot. Too much.  
><strong>

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
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_"All sins tend to be addictive, and the terminal point of addiction is damnation."- W. H. Auden _

**~#::#::#::#~**_  
><em>

Dawn came beautifully through the large hospital windows, streaming luxurious rays into Brittany's room. Clear ocean blue eyes open delicately, fluttering their way. There's a comfortable, warm weight on Brittany and a familiar heart beat thumping on top of her's. Feeling damp drool on her chest, Brittany doesn't need to look down to know it's Santana sleeping. She does anyway, gazing deeply at the sleeping beauty as she dreams.

Brittany knows how Santana ended up here and smiles, remembering her past encounter with the girl's father.

_Knock Knock_

_ "Come in!" Brittany shouts, hoping the guest beyond the door can hear._

_ The door opens and in walks Santana's father. Brittany sits in shock, seeing the familiar man after months and months of absence. He aged well and still has that damn cocky presence about him. It's different though, he comes in with a demanding feel and concerned look._

_ "Hey, Brittany! Long time no see, girl," he starts it off, smiling._

_ She still looks at him in awe before understanding that he was actually there, it felt like a dream. Soon enough a smile graces her face and lights the room with it's radiance._

_ "Hey, Mr. Lopez! I haven't seen you in forever," she says excitedly, clutching the blanket in her palms with joy. "Where have you gone all this time? Over the rainbow?"_

_ Santana's father chuckled and shook his head. Some things never seem to chance about Brittany._

_ "Naw. It doesn't matter," he waves off the topic, not wanting to dwell on it too much. "Say, I saw Santana leave out here before. What went down between you two?"_

_ Brittany tries to register the words after 'Santana' but its hard. The second that girl's name was spoken Brittany became rigid and tense. She needs to see her beautiful face and feel her silky skin in a warm embrace. Being in love with Santana is one of the hardest things to keep up with sometimes. _

_ "She wouldn't make us official," Brittany shrugged, as if it she was talking to just some stranger and not Santana's own father._

_ Unsurprisingly, Santana's father rolled his eyes in hearing the obvious mistakes of his daughter. Right away he knew it was his job to drag her back here but he couldn't help but think she should be making these decisions. He wasn't looking to be an object that keeps his daughter's relationship together. He was looking for her happiness, though. _

_ Santana may have a few problems but one is very outstanding against her father. When you leave Santana Lopez, you don't come back. She will either not let you in or your relationship with her will never be the same again. He left her knowing this and she knows he knew too. No matter how long you have spent your life with Santana, if you leave her it's for worse. _

_ Brittany is a lucky girl. She lived after getting hit by a car, only losing her legs. In the future, she even has a chance of getting them fixed again. A thin chance, though. Most of all, what makes Brittany the luckiest girl, is that Santana actually fought for her. _

_ Santana has never bared her feelings to anyone before Brittany. Her love for her is quite a rare one of a kind; a precious antique not to be toyed with. Brittany doesn't really have many options, her relationship with Santana is black or white; it's there or it never was. _

_ "Yeah well she will," Santana's father broke the train of thought. "You want me to get her?"_

_ Brittany bashfully nodded and chewed the pointed knuckle of her bent index finger._

_ "I would like that," she mumbled innocently. "Oh! Tell her I can't reach my phone..."_

_ Santana's father didn't dwell on the enigma that is Brittany's mind. He simply nodded his reply and left the room with a vibe of hope and comfort. Seeing him again made Brittany feel so little, it was odd- in a good way. _

Brittany needs to remind herself to thank Santana's father later, he really pulled through for her this time. She gazes down to Santana as she lightly snores through her dreams. It's cute how a girl with such a tough exterior would have such a plush side for the blonde. People are strange in a way that they aren't one person; there is always a mask. Their masks are mysteries themselves, having each their own unique reason to hide the true face of their holder.

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><p>Marissa shivers in the early morning cool, quickly walking her way out of the wrong side of Lima Heights. Dark alleys spun around her, screaming out her name in a dark temptation reaching for her uncorrupted ears. She tells herself she should be used to being alone since she has been her whole life. Never before has she wanted somebody than right now.<p>

All it took was one wrong turn.

"Hey there kid," came a deep, deep voice.

Marissa froze in spot, her heart nearly stopping. Blood drained from her body as she has never felt so paralyzed and helpless before. Where is Santana to save her? She goes to take a step but gets instantly stopped by a strong grip on her arm.

"Please, I'm just trying to get home without any trouble," she whispers, tears forming in her eyes.

A dark chuckle snickered behind her.

"I'm not here to hurt you kid, that's your choice. You either buy my shit or I fucking kill you," he grunted, drawing out a knife from his pocket and sliding the rusty point against the soft skin of her neck.

A desperate gasp was sharply inhaled the second she felt the sharp point against her neck. She is alone and hopeless for any savior. No one would even know if she died right now. He pulled her roughly into a near dark alley.

"Please! Don't kill me! Please," she pleaded, tears now streaming down her face in stinging, salty washes.

His laughter is deep and cryptic. The more she cried, the more fun he is having. Slowly, he drew a gun from his other pocket. She tried to cry out but is too petrified. The gun barrel is staring her in the face.

"Run and I'll shoot," he sternly growled, aiming the pistol at her more intently.

With that threat, he shoved her down to the floor and withdrew his trench coat. Inside the leather material lay dozens of needles filled with what looks like heroin. Marissa's eyes went wide as she covered her mouth and heart. Prays would be silly now.

"Give me your wallet and I'll let you leave _and _I'll throw in a few needles for you," he winked. "First ones on the house."

Before she could think, the man lunged at her and stabbed the needle into the bend of her arm. She bit down so hard on her lips that crimson blood began to ooze into her mouth. Her sobs weren't heard as the substance began to inject inside her veins, deep into her system. Soon her arms and legs began to feel a heavy sensation. It felt better than she expected, though. In fact, it felt really _really _good.

"Whoa," she lazily slurs, feeling sleepy but so awake.

She doesn't notice the man already stole her wallet and was off. Quite frankly, she didn't care. All that matters to her is that he left six more needles for her entertainment. Taking this is like medicine. She doesn't feel the need to have friends or anyone to care for her anymore. She hasn't a care in the world actually. Drugs eating away to your death feels nicer than she ever thought possible.

"I'm gonna- gonna walk home now," she happily told herself, ducking her body down to snatch up the needles.

Finally, when Marissa made it back to her desolate house, she tripped happily up to her room. There are no photos up, no drawers or dressers, only a full length mirror and an old bed on the dusty wooden floor. She doesn't need any pictures up, she has no pictures to smile at. All her friends stabbed her back in her old school, it got to the point of suicide thoughts and anorexia, she had to move, and she ended up in this wasteland of a place. All memories she tried everyday to throw down into flames. Emotional scars are permanent, though.

Being such an innocent and good kid she was, she never would have considered drugs. Not until now, at least. She is getting such a relief right now. Why stop? Shaking her head to herself, she internally says that she should have taken this shit up years ago. There's a few crystal drops to the floor and she looks down to the noise.

On the floor lay her needles. They're all intact and waiting for attention. She tells herself she'll have only one more for now. What's the worst that could happen?

Drooping down to the hard floor, she smiles at the pretty needles. They glisten rainbow diamonds in her eyes and appear ravishing. Plucking a special one out of the bunch, she carefully draws it across her arm. She giggles at the tickling feelings it carries up her. Then, she drives it into her veins. This time she gets to control how fast it spills out into her and it's great.

She's lost all control.

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><p><strong>Ohhh, I'm baaaaaddd!~ Would be so kind as to review? :)<strong>


	9. Hero To Stand

**Oh god you guys.**** Longest chapter yet! PARTYING! And I get fanfiction is about writing what you want but I want my readers to enjoy it too. I have no problem altering the storyline, in fact I like what it's become. Writing this chapter was a little hard but I want to keep the updates nice. _THIS WILL BECOME M NEXT CHAPTER! _**** No, there will be no sex yet but I figured I curse a lot and talk about rape and addiction so... Not rated T next chapter. Just a heads up. Please review and enjoy! Brittana is on, it's always on!  
><strong>

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
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_"A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles."- Christopher Reeve _

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"SAN WAKE UP!"

"Ugh, Britt!" Santana whines into the girl's chest, stretching out her arms above Brittany's head.

Brittany gives a goofy smile down to the girl and reaches her hands up to entwine them with the Latina's. Santana sleepily smiles back, lifting her head to meet Brittany's gentle gaze. She loves the way Brittany looks at her sometimes. It makes her like, no matter what, they will always have their connection; even if they are on opposite sides of the world.

"Morning, beautiful," Brittany murmurs, bringing their hands down in between them and laying sweet kisses on Santana's knuckles.

"You're such a suck up," Santana winks, leaning up to brush her nose against Brittany's.

Brittany giggles at the affectionate mirror of Santana she knows is reserved specifically for her and only her. She always wonders why Santana has to act mean all the time. No one likes a mean person. Does Santana want no one to like her?

"I just don't want to lose you," Brittany lowly states, the happy mood suddenly dulling.

Santana's smile fades as she gazes deep into Brittany's blue eyes. A look of confusion and almost offense came across her face, twisting her angelic features with concern and worry.

"Why would you ever say that, Britt?" She asks, delicately holding the blonde's chin so she'll keep her gaze.

Brittany still averts her eyes to the side, looking out the window with lack of emotion. The world is so beautiful beyond those invisible shields, a world she won't be able to walk on again for all she knows. Tears gloss her blue pearls as she thins her lips into a straight line.

"Brittany-"

"San, I can't move my legs!" Brittany cuts her off, closing her eyes as she loudly declares her unfortunate condition.

Santana gasps and pulls back slightly, cringing at the girl's sudden outburst. She looks at Brittany with tear-filled eyes.

"Brittany, you know no matter what- I love you," Santana comfortingly murmurs, a small, faint smile gracing her sad face. "You could be dying and nothing would change that. I love you, Brittany."

Brittany bores back at Santana with a frail, helpless appearance. She looks so vulnerable it tore her apart. Santana can't help but feel like herself when she confessed her love for Brittany for the first time. It was life changing but only made her stronger.

"How can you love me if I can't move my legs. What if you run away again and I can't chase you?" Brittany cries, separating their hands and covering her face.

Santana can't find a smile anymore. She replies on telling the truth now. Taking Brittany's hands with her own forcefully, she captures Brittany's eyes.

"I can promise you, Britt, I am going _nowhere. _Not without you. So you can't move your legs," Santana states, drowning in Brittany's eyes. "It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that you are with me and we are together."

Santana doesn't let Brittany have a chance to respond. She doesn't even give her an opportunity to think or take in her words. She just leans in and tenderly takes Brittany's lips with her own. Brittany is already kissing her back, hungrily and longingly. Santana lets her take control as the blonde pulls her down more into her with need. They break away eventually to take a breath.

"Santana- I love you so much."

"I love you too, Britt."

Brittany watches Santana endearingly, missing the moments they shared together.

"I'm so stupid," Brittany admits, unlatching their hands and winding her arms around the girl's waist. "Forgive me."

Santana is confused- again. Usually she's good with all of Brittany's odd gestures and random sayings but when the intelligent, emotional Brittany comes out it's a whole other thing. Santana wonders why Brittany acts stupid all the time. No one likes stupid people. Stupid people get used and thrown in the trash like they don't know anything. Does Brittany want to get thrown in the trash or is she used to it?

"For what, Britt?" Santana asks, weaving her arms around the girl's neck.

Brittany took a deep inhale and began to draw circles around Santana's back.

"I hurt you and pressured you to do something you don't want to. It was wrong and we haven't talked to each other in forever because of it. I left you and you can easily leave me," Brittany murmurs, raking her hands down Santana's back in a gentle massage.

Santana sighs and rolls her eyes at Brittany's irrational fear.

"Britt, I already said I'm not leaving you and that's that," Santana says more sternly, tightening her arms around Brittany and settling into her.

Suddenly, the door busts open. Santana grunts when she doesn't need to guess what guest is that obnoxious.

"HEY LADIES!"

Quinn swats Puck's side when he roars out. Rachel cringes into Quinn a little, startled by his bellowing voice. The blonde bring her arm around Rachel's waist in a friendly manner. Santana doesn't miss a beat.

"Puck, go home. I want to make out with San," Brittany pouts annoyed, resting her chin on Santana's head.

The Latina stiffened in Brittany's embrace as her face flushed a deep red. Brittany is already so open about everything after telling her friends, this is why Santana can't let anything get out- not yet. Rachel blushed just as hard as Santana and turned her face into Quinn's shoulder. Quinn smiles into her brunette hair warmly.

Puck grins like a child but shrugs it off. He may be disrespectful to most girls though his friends are exceptions. Guilt suddenly hits from the cute sight before him and Puck never feels guilty. He just remembered when he tried to help Artie get Brittany to go to prom with him.

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><p><em>The last bell rung at school and Puck was already halfway out to his car. That was until he got a notebook thrashed to his back.<em>

_ "NOAH FUCKING PUCKERMAN I WILL KILL YOU!"_

_ Santana was the epitome of pissed off. He grunted at the blow but spun around to face the enraged girl stomping up to him. His annoyed face grew blank when he noticed something he doesn't usually see in Santana unless she is drunk. She was angry, of course, but she was hurt. Santana Lopez was hurt. _

_ "What is your problem?" He shoots back, drawing out his arms questioningly._

_ Santana made her way up to him and punches his chest. She hisses and brings her injured hand back in a fail attempt at hurting him. Still, her face remains angry and hurt as she glares up at him knowingly._

_ "You fucking tried to help that ugly cripple get Brittany, didn't you? Why would you do that, he's such a damn loser!" Santana roars, running a free hand through her hair roughly._

_ That was the moment Puck finally noticed it all. Santana was totally into Brittany. How could he not see it before? Oh right, he almost forgot he was Puck. It was always so clear though._

_ "I don't think it's because the kid is a loser, Santana. You're pissed- because you got a crush on little Brittany. Don't you?" Puck points out with an achieving smirk, thoughtfully pointing at Santana._

_ Santana shot Puck one of her obviously fake offended looks, over exaggerating the emotion. She shoves his chest again even though she knows it will do nothing. This girl really doesn't miss a beat at anything. All those years living a lie, she let's nothing visibly phase her anymore._

_ "That's gross Puck! She's my best friend, and that's it!" Santana insists a little too desperately. _

_ Puck nods his head with an amused expression. He was totally right. _

_ "You know what, Santana? Doesn't even matter. The kid got turned down. If I cared a little, it may even seem like Brittany was looking for _someone else,_" he draws out, smiling like he just told a secret about someone else and turned off to leave Santana with that._

_ The Latina simply stood there in the filling parking lot. All strange faces poured out around her, some shoving her and telling her to move. She did. No reason for her to look indifferent and like an idiot._

* * *

><p>Puck frowned at himself. He shouldn't have tried to help that kid, he's a total douche. Brittany belongs with Santana and Santana with Brittany. It was decided the second their eyes met.<p>

"Whatever," he shrugs before taking a seat and watching the small television with a bothered face.

Santana notices and reminds herself to interrogate him later. Right now though, she's with Brittany. Smiling back to her, the blonde returns the kind gesture. Something comes over Santana and she doesn't think about it. She doesn't let her fears stop her. Leaning in, she captures Brittany's lips with her own.

"Oh," Quinn gasps, covering her eyes.

Puck whips his head around and smiles widely at them. Rachel squeals into Quinn's shoulder.

"THATA GIRL!"

"Puck! Shut the _fuck _up!" Quinn grunts, glaring at him pointedly.

"What? I'm proud of my girls!" He grins, giving them a sly thumbs up.

The door swings open and Santana's father walks in.

"Yeah, me too. But no kissing in the hospital! You girls are ridiculous," he shakes his head, grinning.

Santana jumps away from the kiss and her eyes widen. Brittany gives her a questioning look and soothes her hair. Santana still isn't used to being around her father and his brightness.

"Wow. Dad. What the hell are you doing here?" Santana asks while clearing her throat, blushing the worst she ever has.

He chuckles lightly and throws an arm around both Quinn and Rachel.

"Can't visit, can I?" He fakes a pout. "Are these two girls, _you know, _too?"

Rachel wanted to disappear along with Quinn as they both blush harshly. Shaking her head violently, Quinn denies it. Santana watches the nervous girl's every movement.

"N-no, sir," Quinn furrows her brows and looks away. "Uhm, it's good to see you again Mr. Lopez, by the way."

He nods his head in return and tightens his grip around the girls before letting them go. He and his daughter shared a well knowing look. Santana smiles, beginning to really enjoy having her father back. Having him back for now, at least. She can't let him get too close ever again. Santana Lopez doesn't get hurt.

"Aaanyway. I'm here with some great news!" He says with a wide smile, throwing his hands up.

Everyone shot him an odd look. Lord knows what he is up to now.

"Well, I had a talk with some of my connections and, uh, your girl gets to go home tonight," he winks to his daughter, pointing the spotlight on her.

Santana sits there, straddling Brittany for a moment. She lets her walls break and fall that moment. With a bright smile lighting her face and the room, she jumps off Brittany and runs to her father like a little child sprinting to get picked up. They embrace tightly and Santana's face is radiating joy and happiness. Brittany smiles sweetly at them, wishing she could get up and hug them too. Things have changed though.

"Oh, no one tell Brittany's parents. I want it to be a surprise," he smiles at the blonde who smiles just as brightly back. "Santana, you drive her home tonight. And _careful._"

Santana rolls her eyes but smiles and nods. He lets her go so she can run back to Brittany and take her hand.

"I gotta get back to work now. It's nice seeing all of you kids," he grins, waving off. "So damn grown up..."

Quinn smiles and watches him go. She really does miss him. Memories with him and Santana when she was little run through her head. They were so close and when high school started it was all a waste. Nothing will be thrown away anymore.

"He's still so funny," Quinn says admirably, gazing at Santana's warm smile.

The Latina bites on her bottom lip with her grin and nods. Time flies as they all talk and share past memories with each other. It was honestly a good day in the hospital, smiles shared by everyone. Elation floats in the air in graceful strides. Night came sooner than everyone thought, as always. Purple and navy swirled in a mystical mix in the sky, dotted with dozens of twinkling stars.

"Britt, you wanna go home now?" Santana asked, gazing out the window.

Quinn, Rachel, and Puck had left only an hour ago. With the day dying out, Santana wants to end it with a great smile on Brittany's parent's faces. She turns to Brittany who grins and nods excitedly.

"Great. I'll go get your- wheelchair..." Santana voice breaks on the word, failing to be calm about this fact.

She walks over and pulls out the retractable object from the side. Opening it, she pats the seat in and goes to help Brittany out of the bed. Gently, she grips her arms and carefully pulls her out. Brittany brings her arms around Santana's neck in a strong hold, meaning to hug her at the same time. She came slowly out of the bed then stopped.

Santana simply stood there, holding Brittany's weight as tightly as she can. Brittany's head lays in the crook of Santana's neck, her useless knees on the floor. Santana can't hold it in anymore.

"I love you, Britt," she whispers in the girl's ear, meaning every word.

Brittany's body bubbles whenever the girl speaks those words. She grins ear to ear and holds Santana closer.

"I love you, too."

With that said, Santana brings Brittany into her seat and delicately places her down in the wheelchair.

"Now, let's get you home babe."

* * *

><p>Marissa walks absently along the snow-blanketed streets. Her emerald green eyes are dilated with her increasing use of drugs, on the verge of death. She can't help it though, they're so addicting. The world is so beautiful with them. She feels like the queen of everything and anything.<p>

Cars pass by, ignoring the disoriented girl as she wanders about aimlessly. Their lights blur around the corner of her gleaming eyes as her sight spins around in lustrous colors. She's got sunshine in her palm and the night at the tip of her toes with it's stars in her eyes. Reaching a hand up, she runs it through her silky ginger hair and feels it's soft texture racing along her fingers.

She eventually finds her way over to the old bridge. It's deserted tonight, only accompanied by small bits of glistening snow running down the sky. Smiling, she gets this lifting feeling. Her bare feet, freezing from the cold conditions, pad against the old wood bellow her. She can hear the sounds of crashing waves in the lake swim into her ear. Taking a deep inhale of the cool, salty air, she smiles.

Soon enough, she finds herself at the rim of the bridge, standing tall on it's stone ledge. One hand runs along the metal beams holding up the large bridge, rusted over it's used time. Cold breezes whip past her in violent lashes, her shirt flying about her stomach in it's strength. Air vortexes form around her open palm and rim her body. Her hair looks like a fire burning in the sky as it dances gracefully.

Santana drives her car carefully down the street, bracing for the upcoming bridge. Brittany's twirling her fingers to _Wannabe _by The Spice Girls playing on the radio. Santana can't help but smile at the still radiant girl.

_"So tell me what you want- what you really really want!~" _Brittany sings, pumping her fists forward.

The car thumps upward and back down, bumping it's way onto the bridge. Santana and Brittany both squeal startled but then laugh. The car drives smoothly on the bridge again. Santana focuses intently on the bridge, driving a reasonable speed in the snow.

"SAN STOP!"

Suddenly, Santana slams her foot on the stop pedal and the car screams to a halt. Santana turns to Brittany with a ridiculous look.

"What is it!"

"There's a girl on the side! I think she's gonna jump! SAVE HER!"

Santana instantly turns on her headlights and there stands a figure on the rim of the bridge. She watches the ginger hair swirling in the night and knows right away who it is. The beaming lights don't even phase the girl as she stand with her back to them.

"I'll be right back, Britt," Santana grunts out in a desperate rush before running out of the car.

"BE CAREFUL SAN!" Brittany calls out, praying the girl heard her plea.

She turned off the radio and watched Santana run around the front of the car and to the stranger. Outside, the wind is strong and the night is freezing. Santana shivers and pulls herself together.

"MARISSA!" She yells over the howling wind.

After a moment, the girl turns around to face her. She watches Santana with her emerald eyes, not seeing the girl is there. Her sight only shows her a mess of colors and a bright light stinging her eyes. She could hear the girl though and she knows it's Santana.

"What are you doing here?" She asks, the sound being heard faintly as it washed away in the wind.

Santana gasps when she sees Marissa's eyes. Her skin looks paler than it was the other day and she's shaking lethally. Santana knew she wasn't the kind of girl that belonged in Lima Heights Adjacent. On account of the needle holes in the girl's arm, Santana can conclude the girl had taken drugs prior to this.

"GET OVER HERE MARISSA! GET OFF THE BRIDGE OR I'LL MAKE YOU"

Marissa shakes her head with a silly smile. She didn't look to do any of that. Who was Santana to tell her what to do? She is queen of everything right now. She can fly if she wants to. Her eyes wonder over to the car and she sees the blonde staring right back at her with pleading eyes. Marissa shoots the girl a incredulous look. She turns to Santana and points a nonchalant finger at the car.

"That's your girlfriend, isn't she?" She asks with a wide grin but bothered eyes.

Santana looks at where the girl's pointing and meet Brittany's helpless gaze. She gives her an assuring smile before facing Marissa again.

"YES! NOW PLEASE, LET ME DRIVE YOU HOME!"

Marissa frowns and wags her finger at Santana. She wasn't planning on going anywhere but the sky. No more bounds could hold her down. Santana bit down on her lip and started for the girl with careful steps. Marissa watched her with a mockingly impressed expression. Santana grunts and reaches out for the girl.

"TAKE MY HAND!"

Marissa watches her hand reach out for her. Her long fingers and rimmed by a near street light with a somber yellow halo. It's time for Santana to be the hero. Marissa shakes her head, watching Santana with wide eyes. It's too late to save her now. She let's her body gently fall backwards.

"NO!"

Marissa feels herself falling through the air slowly. The wind whips around her with her fiery hair dancing before her eyes. Santana's leaning over the side, reaching a helpless hand down to her as if she could do anything more. It felt so nice, falling.

Santana is frozen in her pleading position for a second. She thinks to herself quickly with panic. This girl had saved her from being raped. For all she knew, she could have got raped herself. No, she went out of her way and risked it all for a stranger. This was the only girl Santana has ever met without a mask. She must return the favor.

Without a second thought of debate, Santana leaps forward and off the bridge. Adrenaline and fear runs up her body as she sees it's a bigger fall than she had calculated before. The fact that she had time to think through her fall was scary enough.

Before she knows it, freezing water slams into her body with full force. Salt water fills her stinging eyes as she instantly shoves her body above the water and take a deep inhale of the cold air to her water-filled lungs. Her clothes cling to her as she swims around desperately and looks for the ginger.

"MARISSA!" She roars out, throwing her head back and gasping for air.

Her wet hair whips her back but she takes the blow. One push after another, she forces her way around the waves until she spots an unconscious body. Marissa is floating around, her face a little too peaceful for comfort.

"MARISSA!"

Santana is already at the girl's side, winding a strong grip around her waist and swimming to shore. They washed roughly onto the grass of the forest, heads harshly slamming into the frozen layer of snow. Before the waves could drag them back into it's clutches, Santana got up and dragged Marissa by her frail hands into the forest.

She bent down and scooped the girl up bridal style. Marissa is a lot lighter than she thought. Santana didn't know Marissa is anorexic though. She raced through the forest with her held tightly in her arms. Santana didn't feel like a hero at all; she left like she was doing her job. She also felt like a total badass.

Twigs snapped below her quick strides, breaking into the air with echos. Running back up to the bridge to make sure Brittany is okay, she made it to her car. Brittany was crawling on the snow, shivering and sobbing as she pulled her body forward with forceful shoves. Her tears fell to the cold snow and melted in.

"Brittany!" Santana cried, almost dropping Marissa as she ran over to the blonde.

Brittany looked up to Santana with hopeless eyes.

"I wanted to help..."

"Oh, Brittany. Shit. I'll be right back!" Santana called, running Marissa into the backseat and darting back out for Brittany.

Santana got down on her knees and ran a hand quickly through Brittany's blonde, Kashmir locks. The girl shook and pushed her face more into Santana's cool hands for warmth desperately. Santana gazes at her with a broken expression.

"Baby, what were you thinking?" She cries, wrapping her arms Brittany and lifting her up clumsily.

"I- I wanted to help you, San. Y- you could have d-died," Brittany sniffled and choked out, clinging more tightly to Santana than her damp clothes.

Santana gives Brittany a small, sad smile. She appreciates the effort but the last thing she wants is Brittany getting hurt. Finally dragging them into the car, she sets Brittany in her seat and lightly closes the door. Santana runs back into the driver's seat and slams the door shut. The warm air pooling in the car isn't heating them up fast enough.

"Britt, listen, I don't want you doing anything for me. Not until you get your legs back," Santana sternly orders, softly reaching out to cup Britanny's chin. "And I promise you will get them back and you _will _dance again."

Brittany smiles sadly and leans across to hug Santana close. The body heat warms them up a lot faster.

"San, you saved that girl and dragged me and her back to the car," Brittany cooes, running her hands through her thick, black hair. "You're my hero."

A lifting of amazing achievment ran through and lit up Santana. Not only did she save the day, but she more importantly became Brittany's hero.

She wasn't just Brittany's knight when they were little. She is Brittany's hero.

* * *

><p><strong>Motherfuckin' <em>CLIFFHANGER!~<em>**_ Kinda..._ No, not at all. Whatever. Review.


	10. Home Sweet Home

**Boy, I can't wait to get through all this. I have MEGA plans ready for this story and I promise you it will be angst and smut/fluff. EXCITEMENT! Enjoy and review. I don't really have much else to say... Lol.**

_I own nothing!_

* * *

><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>

"_So, like a forgotten fire, a childhood can always flare up again within us."- Gaston Bachelard _

**~#::#::#::#~**_  
><em>

_ Little Santana wandered around aimlessly one warm summer night, a certain blonde torturing her thoughts to no end. One of her meager hands was wound tightly around the feeble string-like material of her blue balloon that bobbed in the sky with each of her passing steps. Below the bare pads of her feet the grass was soft and trimmed to perfection; an easy indication she made her way out of Lima Heights. _

_ Santana didn't have too many friends as a child, she never really did at all. Parents kept their kids away from her, assuming she was bad for them since she lives in Lima Heights. Secretly, Santana always wanted tons a friend to play Barbie with and messily paint each others nails. Her mother would always yell at her, mad her daughter couldn't make at least four friends. It was nothing Santana could help though, their parents would make up horrible stories about her so they wouldn't even look her way. _

_ Brittany was different. She talked to Santana the moment her eyes found her sitting alone on a tree stump in the park. Her mother was different. She walked over to Santana's mom and pointed out their children were playing well together. Santana always thought Brittany was an angel sent from God to cheer her up when she was sad and alone. Quinn was different. She talked to Santana on rare occasions but it was friendly. Her mother wasn't different. If Quinn got caught talking to Santana, she would get sternly punished. _

_ Being apart from Brittany too long made Santana scared she would never see her again. She would make herself nervous that Brittany's mom would suddenly take her away for good like all the other parents have. Terrible thoughts would fill her mind that the only thing she had in her life was Brittany. She would tell herself she's at least thankful for something._

_ One day, she found a strategy to hide all the pain away and lock it shut. It was in art class and the children were learning how to make masks using clay and paint. The teacher specifically said, "When you're wearing a mask, no one can know it's you! It's like you're a whole new person, but still the same you! And you can make as many as you want!"_

_ That day, Santana made over five masks in one class while all the other students made only two. They were all average kids though, so Santana didn't mind. She knew she stuck out from everyone else and she accepted it because she didn't have any other option. Shooting stars granted none of her wishes. _

_ Santana's lazy steps lead her to Brittany's house. Brittany was away on vacation and hasn't been home in two trekking days. Tears fill Santana's puppy eyes as she pleadingly looks up to the empty building and silently begs for her dear friend to come back. She began to think Brittany didn't really leave on vacation but that she left so she won't come back and didn't want to hurt Santana's feelings. Santana asked herself what feelings she has remaining to possibly hurt. _

_ Shoulders slumping in defeat, she trudges over to the porch and plops onto the first white step._

_ "I got you this balloon Brittany but you're not here," she mumbles to herself sadly. _

_ She fumbles around with it until it's tied around her tiny pinky. Closing her eyes, she imagines Brittany's holding her pink and a small smile graces her face. Eventually, she gets up and leaves back to her house. It became routine every night until Brittany finally got back and Santana could hand her the balloon that replaced her for the duration of her vacation._

* * *

><p>"Lady Gaga," Marissa slurs, waking up and flopping herself over the side of Brittany's seat. "Is just- <em>such <em>a nice lady."

"Shut it, Marissa," Santana deadpans, driving the car through the night with her clothes still partially soaked. "It's good to know you're alive though."

Brittany looks over to the girl with a super toothy smile. She shamelessly reached out and touches the girl's ginger hair.

"Wow! You're like Valerie! I don't know any Valeries but San misses one. She sung about it. But I guess your names Marissa because San says so and San is always right. Right, San?" Brittany asks, looking over to Santana.

Santana sighs but nods her head. Brittany must really enjoy repeating the girl's name because it never seems to get old to her. Marissa is a little taken aback in seeing how radiant Brittany is. She almost forgot even how she ended up in Santana's car. What happened before was impossible to forget, though.

"It's nice to finally meet you, Brittany! You're the lucky girl!" Marissa grins, watching Brittany as she played with her hair. "Oh and Santana I'm going to have to thank you later..."

Santana shrugged and accepted the offer. Same old Santana Lopez. Not like she didn't risk her life for the girl or anything special like that. Brittany blushed shyly when Marissa said she was the lucky girl.

"Marissa," Santana began lowly. "What happened to you?"

Marissa froze in her position while Brittany still fiddled with her hair, making braids and undoing it. It's hard for her to act indifferent about everything that had just occurred; she nearly killed herself.

"I don't want to talk about it," she whispers, pulling away from Brittany's hands and slumping back in her seat.

Santana tightened her grip on the steering wheel. Lately she doesn't know what's gotten over her. Since when did she give a fuck about Quinn, Puck, Rachel, and a random new ginger kid? She's not supposed to be like this, it won't result in anything good. Santana isn't going to be a pathetic, vulnerable person.

"Whatever," Santana mumbles, finding her previous character. "Where the hell do you live?"

Marissa pulls at the bottom loose stitches of her sweater and watched the world pass by beyond the car. She must have messed everything up now. Who was she to think she had a chance at being Santana's friend anyway? Seeing how everyone reacts when they hear the girl's name says it all.

"I'm your neighbor."

Santana's eyes went wide. Wouldn't she have noticed this before? Realization hits her when she recalls those enormous moving trucks making those loud noises, resulting in her sleep-deprived nights. Fortunately, they are still near Lima Heights so Santana drives a quick path to her house. They drive up the worn pavement covered in snow and slightly slip to an abrupt stop.

"Get out," Santana ordered, turning back to look at Marissa. "We'll talk some other time. Tell anyone I'm with Brittany and I will _destroy _you with razorblades. Is that clear?"

Marissa clamps her mouth shut and violently nods her head as if her life depends on it. Brittany watches Santana thoughtfully, wondering what has gotten into the girl. She prays she isn't going to her old self again, no one likes the mean-masked Santana. That mask is the ugliest of them all.

"Thank you for everything, Santana," Marissa whispers before rushing out of the car and closing the door close behind her.

Santana shakes her head and turns out of the street. She leans over the side of her seat to watch as she rears the car out when she suddenly lost her concentration. Brittany quickly moved in to kiss Santana on the lips the second she saw the girl's intentions. She pulls away after a moment and gazes into Santana's eyes.

"Don't be mean, San," Brittany murmurs with her lips brushing Santana's before she settles back into her seat with a smug smile clear across her face.

Santana sat in a haze before abruptly collecting herself. A heavy sigh left her throat and she gave into Brittany's request. Brittany gets anything in the universe she delights. Hell, Santana could bring her to the moon if she liked and if not she could bring the moon to her.

They sat together in silence throughout the duration of the ride to Brittany's house. Half way through, the blonde reached out and laid a gentle hand to soothe the silk skin of Santana's knee. The Latina clung to the wheel to calm herself as her sexual frustration reached a deadly peak. She kept herself contained as they reached the girl's house, internally proud of her wits.

Santana got out and went to the trunk to get Brittany's wheelchair. Hauling out the steel object left Santana with a bitter feeling, thinking to herself she shouldn't be doing this because Brittany should be okay; she should have been there to push Brittany out of the way of that speeding car. Wheeling the chair over to Brittany's side, she opened the door and lent out a hand to the beautiful blonde.

"Why thank you," Brittany fondly commented with a coy grin, reaching out her hand to lace it with Santana's.

Santana's face lit up when she felt the spark Brittany's warm hand gave her. Every time she feels that special spark it makes her fall in love with Brittany all over again. Just like the first time they met...

* * *

><p><em>"Santana find a partner already!"<em>

_ The little Latina quivered in her seat when she felt all the eyes of the gathering students set on her. Her cruel teacher was yelling at her for no valid, rational reason- again. _

_ Brittany's head poked up from the colorful rug when she heard the teacher roar again. Her blue eyes scanned the crowd until joining them at their obvious stare on the panicing caramel-skinned girl. Salty tears began to pool in Santana's eyes as she looked around desperately, biting on the skin of her knuckles as she pleadingly searched for a willing soul. Only faces filled with disgust glared back, judging her based on stories their parents made up._

_ "I- uhmm," her little voice broke as the first tear rolled down her rosy cheek, the room spinning around her. _

_ Suddenly, she felt a sharp shock to her back. She jumped in her seat and turned around at meet apologizing blue eyes._

_ "Sorry! I didn't mean to attack lightening to you!" Brittany instantly cried out, holding her hands to her chest strongly. "I just wanted to know if you would be my partner cause I want you to be my partner really badly!"_

_ Santana, along with the entire class, stared in awe directly at Brittany. On account of the girl's incredibly improper grammar, mean assumptions had already been thought. Brittany took all the attention with pride for Santana. She was more glad Santana didn't have to panic or worry than having the attention itself. _

_ "I- I-" Santana couldn't find the words as her throat and lips grew dry._

_ "Pretty please?" Brittany pleaded, bouncing a little in her spot with anticipation._

_ Santana glanced at the crowd, then the teacher, they were just as shocked as she was. Quinn caught Santana's eyes for a second and nodded her head sternly, silently ordering her to accept Brittany's offer. Santana gave her a thankful smile before turning to Brittany with a new confidence. _

_ "You can be my partner," Santana grinned, reaching out her pinky to Brittany's._

_ There was another shock when they linked fingers. Both of them giggled before skipping to work. All the other students shot them odd looks and backed away from them. Santana didn't care; she had Brittany and that's all that mattered. Brittany looked at little Santana with a smile._

* * *

><p>Brittany looked up at Santana with a warm smile, feeling that exact identical shock. Santana pulled Brittany carefully out of the car by her waist and gently set her in the chair. She was about to pull away when Brittany only tugged her back in again.<p>

"San, I love you," she whispered into her ear with deep meaning.

Santana bit down on her bottom lip and just let herself soak up the words. She felt like the more Brittany says it, the more meaning it obtains.

"I love you too, Brittany," she grins, tightening her hold and Brittany before letting her breathe. "Now text your parents and tell them to come outside."

Brittany nods with a bright smile and takes out her phone. She taps the screen a few times and less than a mintue later her parents are flying out the door.

"BRITTANY!"

"MY BABY!"

"YOU'RE HOME!"

"WE LOVE YOU AND MISSED YOU!"

"THANK YOU FOR DRIVING HER SANTANA!"

That went on for quite awhile until they finally got into the house. Everyone gathered to the table for a late dinner and ate. Santana feels as though she hasn't ate with Brittany's family in years; it's a dull and dreary feeling. Being back with them means the world to her, lighting her days a little more every moment.

Afterwards, Brittany's mother cleaned the dishes and her father proceeded to watch some sports in the living room. Santana and Brittany stood in front of the stairs, looking up at every step with a horrified face.

"How are we...?"

"Put your arms around my neck and lay on my back."

It wasn't an option; Santana ordered Brittany sternly. She told herself she would get Brittany up to her room and that's exactly what she's going to do. Brittany gave out a little meep before doing as told and sliding out of her chair onto Santana's slouched back. The Latina wrapped her hands around Brittany's and held them so she wasn't getting choked to death.

Then, careful step by step, she made her way up the stairs with Brittany on her back. When they finally got to the top, both girls fell to the floor in a fit of giggles.

"You did it!" Brittany laughed, holding her hands up in fierce fists.

Santana laughed back and twined her arms around Brittany's waist.

"Yup, sure did," she smiled bashfully, nuzzling Brittany's neck. "You smell like Berry's candles and it keeps reminding me of her face. Let's get you washed."

Brittany pulled away from Santana with a face full of fear and uncertainty.

"How-?"

"I'm going to help you," Santana winked, biting her lower lip.

Brittany's face already flushed a deep red at the thought, not to mention her dampening panties. She took a quick moment to thank the lord her lower area still works. It would be way too embarrassing to just pee and not even know it.

Santana brought them into the bathroom before Brittany could protest, which she didn't, and sat her on the sink. It's a little awkward since Brittany is much taller than Santana but needlessly to say, the sight is very endearing with Santana's cute efforts. Santana turns the water on in the tub, making it a content warm temperature.

"Where to start?" Santana playfully asks herself as her figners dance along the bottom hem of Brittany's shirt.

Slowly, she brought up the material and threw it behind her. It sploshed to the tile floor like nothing. Santana gazed at Brittany's toned stomach with lustrous eyes, licking her full lips delightedly. Brittany blushed and ducked her head down.

"Hey," Santana murmurs, lifting Brittany's averted stare by her chin gently. "You look beautiful."

Brittany looks deeply into Santana warm chocolate eyes, drowning in the swirling dark colors reflecting in the dim yellow light. They're rimmed by the dull yellow and slightly tanned by it's lighting, creating a nice, romantic surrounding. A bright smile lit up Brittany's face.

Santana offered a wink before pulling down Brittany's sweatpants. She carefully tugged the soft cloth down until it fell off the blonde's immobile feet. Crawling her way back up, she leaned into Brittany and held her at the hips.

"You really are beautiful," Santana says into Brittany's ear, reaching behind her to unclasp her bra.

She pulls away from her and watchs it fall, exposing Brittany's perfect breasts. Not wanting to embaress the girl, she doesn't look for too long until she reaches down for her pockadot panties. She slides her index finger under it and hooks it around the thin lace, not breaking eye contact with Brittany. Gradually, she drags it down and off Brittany's feet, forcing it out from under the sitting girl.

Finally, she wraps her arms around Brittany's waist and brings her to the tub. Brittany sits up in the water with the support of her arms loosely on the edges.

"Is it warm enough?" Santana asks, hoping it wasn't too hot or cool.

Brittany shivers from the goosebumps forming up her arms. The water is at the perfect temperature, she has nothing to complain about except that Santana isn't in with her.

"It's perfect, San," she says, looking up at the girl with need in her deep blue eyes. "Come in too?"

Santana pulls off her cloths and lets Brittany shamelessly watch. When she's finally free of all the winter clothing, she steps into the warm tub and places herself behind Brittany. The blonde lets her body relax and lean back into Santana's bare front, a content smile on both of their faces. They sat for awhile, Santana's arms around Brittany's as she holds her close.

"I love you, Britt."

"I love you, too. Proudly so."

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><p><strong>LOL no sex. Oh well! I'm not that horny tonight. Sorry folks. LMAO! There will be sex, though. I <em>promise.<em>**


	11. Not Perfect Yet

**Oy. This is actually the shortest chapter yet my bad. But you guys want more emotion so I think this is like a really nice and chill chapter just between Brittany and Santana because I feel we need it. And I don't know what people actually do when they can't walk anymore and having Brittany as a cripple is more troubling than I thought it would be but no matter what I want to make you guys cry at least once through this. NOT IN A BAD WAY. I just- you read things for the emotion, right? I cry all the time so like, I'm trying to make this really touching. I'm sorry if I have those few mistakes I don't have a beta I just write like it's hot. But um yeah get ready you guys because this chapter is just the beginning. We have quite a ways to go from now on. We will beat this hiatus! I feel like I talk too much, but please read and REVIEW! I love review! When I get those like bigs ones I always start writing a new chapter because it get's me so pumped. ENJOY!~**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>

"_I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you."- __Roy Croft_

**~#::#::#::#~**_  
><em>

Not a single sound was heard in the Pierce's household tonight; a tranquil calm washed over the night now that the missing puzzle piece had gotten returned. Snow drifted slowly down the night's curtain in liquid motions so peaceful, shaping a gorgeous cloak over the forgotten green grass. Up above, high in the heavens, an endless abyss of gleaming stars wink and refract their diamond cut light onto each other like a thousand lost wedding rings begging for attention.

Free from the thwart of any malign stars or people, two star-crossed lovers lay together side by side on a soft, plush bed. Both of their bodies slightly sink into the comfortable cushioning, becoming drown in a pool of the warmest, fluffiest feathers. Santana's molten chocolate eyes gaze deep into Brittany's clear ocean blue ones, conveying such loving emotion it kept making Brittany's heart skip a couple of beats too fast. Everything is near perfect in this moment; all things with the exception of Brittany's immovable legs.

"San, how come you're not like this all the time?" Brittany asks, not breaking but soothing the content silence.

Santana gazes at Brittany thoughtfully now. She never dwelled on that topic before to herself, too aimed at all the attention she's been getting since she became a growing cheerio. The moment other people began to notice her, it was like she didn't need Brittany at all but at the same time she couldn't let go of her. That and the fact she could never accept the fact she is deeply and helplessly in love with her until just last year.

Knowing all too well what her mother would do to her if she found out about Brittany and her, she was petrified. All the attention she is finally getting now would revert back to those odd, mean looks passing by on a daily basis without shame, once again jumping to awful conclusions and not considering any facts proving otherwise. They're all stubborn, all of them, except the few members of Glee club. Santana wasn't joking when she said Glee club was the best part of her day because even now it still is and will remain that way.

Brittany almost died though. Santana's whole life with the girl flashed before her eyes the moment she saw that car fly by in front of her. That single burst of air threw her hair back in a disarray and it was the most horrifying moment of realization in her life; knowing Brittany just got severely hurt, possibly even killed, and she couldn't do a single thing about it. She can still vividly remember vowing to herself everything will change- and this time for the better.

"Because I was scared, Britt," she says, not breaking eye contact with the girl. "I was pathetic and fucking helpless."

"But why-?"

"It doesn't matter anymore why," she softly interrupts Brittany with a gentle finger to her mouth, moving to tenderly cup her rosy cheek. "Things are going to change..."

Brittany's eyes watch Santana's every word and every movement. She tells herself that the girl means it, but after all of the lies and let downs over time, she doesn't know what to expect or believe anymore. It's a horrible thing; being unable to believe the one person you love and have spent most if not all your existence with. Brittany is more vulnerable than ever and Santana knows that.

Adrenaline pulses through Santana as she considers what events could go down at school. School itself is only a day away. All options soared through her mind, both bad and good; both possible and very unlikely. None of them matter a thing anymore, not to Santana.

"Do you really mean it?" Brittany asks with caution in her voice.

Santana's eyes gaze so deep into Brittany's that she's at the point of no return. Brittany truly deserves the universe and more. Growing up with her was such a blessing, Santana has no words to convey her great thanks for Brittany's existence in her life. Without the blonde the world not only seems like the most dark depths of a galaxy, but as though it is hell itself. Santana has no meaning without this one girl by her side.

Contemplating what the world would be without Brittany scares the Latina more than when she was an infant. No one would have ever noticed her, she wouldn't even be a mask to everyone, she wouldn't be there at all. Not a friend to spare in the world. Santana has many words to speak but she doesn't know where to begin.

"Listen, Britt- I know before I was a bitch," she starts out from scratch, admitting every truth and secret she has to tell. "Before I didn't even no what romance was, I thought it was some stupid idea made up for movies. But Brittany you have to believe me when I say that _I need you. _Brittany, I need you more than I fucking need myself. I just-"

Santana cuts herself off to catch her breath when tears pool in her eyes. She reaches out for Brittany and clings to the front of her pajamas, pulling the blonde so close to her that she smothers her. Her hold on Brittany is now so desperate it's more of a little child holding to their favorite blanket through an awful nightmare. She can no longer cage in her sobs as the bars break and she seeps into Brittany's body.

"I almost lost you, Britt," her voice is so high and vulnerable, it breaks Brittany's heart. "What if I really did lose you? No one knows how much I need you. I don't even know myself and it fucking scares me!"

Santana's body shakes with her harsh sobs as the tears spill onto Brittany's neck. The blonde's moist neck grows hot from the Latina's desperate panting and salty tears, goosebumps rising on her pale skin. Brittany tries to sooth Santana's hair but nothing seems to be helping.

"San, I love you," she coos with forming tears, sadly smiling into the thick black locks. "Please don't cry, it makes my heart hurt every time you cry..."

"Brittany you don't understand I want to be perfect for you!" Santana raises her voice forcefully, pulling away slightly to gaze at Brittany. "I am not perfect, not at fucking all, but I will _always _be trying to be for you. I love you so much and almost losing you I nearly lost myself..."

Brittany gazes back just as intensely and nods to Santana's every word. She doesn't want Santana to be perfect for her though; Santana is already too awesome as it is. No one can see Santana's awesomeness like she can, but she can swear that the moment anyone sees it, it's the most amazing sight.

"It's okay San, you'll always have me," Brittany assures her with a tear-filled smile.

Santana just takes a moment and gazes at Brittany. She remembers everything they went through- as she has been doing for the past few days. Her whole life has changed with the potential lose of Brittany. Finally, she finds the words she has been searching for since she met Brittany.

"Brittany, will you be my girlfriend?"

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><p><strong>CLIFFHANGER FOR REAL EVEN THOUGH WE ALL KNOW WHAT BRITTANY IS GONNA SAY... <strong>_or do we?... mehehe REVIEW. :)_


	12. What's A Kiss To You

**Special thanks to littlemusical, I love you. :) I don't have much to say about this chapter but I try to keep have huge events consistent for every chapter because that's what makes a story soooo. Yeah. Read and Review! And enjoy! Oh and... get ready for next chapter. That's all I have to say. ;) In an either GOOD, BAD, or kinky way. WE'LL HAVE TO SEE. ****Did you know reviewing has been proven to make you live longer? LOL.**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
><em>

_"__Is not a kiss the very autograph of love?"- Henry Finck _

**~#::#::#::#~**_  
><em>

Sunlight shines on closed caramel eyes, slowly awakening it's owner gently with it's gleaming rays. Santana drags out a long, cute yawn, leaning up above Brittany before slumping back down onto her again with a lazy thud. Amazingly enough, Brittany didn't even spare a stir in her sleep, only her arms tightened more around Santana's waist as they lay tangled in each other with wrapped legs. Warmth radiates off both their bodies, making the bed all too cozy in the cold morning.

Finally receiving the chance to wake up before Brittany, Santana took proper use of it and gazes at the girl as she sleeps. It's endearing to watch but also so frightening she wants to run. This one girl, laying before her with a fragile body already injured, means the whole world to Santana. In a way it's easy, knowing the reason you live and not questioning it your whole life. In other ways it's the hardest thing, needing to constantly watch your paranoia and keep feelings of possession to a contained and reasonable level.

Glancing to check the clock, Santana's heart almost stops. She doesn't have time to prepare herself, she only can gape at the time.

"WAKE UP IT'S TIME TO GET READY FOR SCHOOL!"

Brittany's mother can really project her voice in her morning calls. Santana smiles to herself nonetheless, missing waking up the way she has most her life. Brittany's mom was more of a mother to Santana than her own.

With deceasing self-esteem, Santana shoves her way out of the bed and runs down the stairs. Her bare feet pad on right after another in her own quick rhythm before she jumps off the last step. Brittany's mother is standing in the hallway with a bright smile as she holds up smiley pancakes towards the girl. Santana can already smell the sweet aroma of syrup in the air but refuses to give into the extreme temptation.

"Breakfast?"

"No thanks, I gotta get home. Sorry," Santana sheepishly states, pulling at the ends of her long sleeve shirt. "Uhm, tell Brittany I'll meet her at school. I'll bring her in."

Brittany's mom can only stand in shock, alone in the yellow hallway holding a batch of fresh pancakes weakly when Santana darts out the door. She asks herself what's gotten into the girl. Knowing Santana's way, she shrugs and assures herself everything will be alright- as she always does. Something just seemed a little too odd about the girl this time; this time it is something different and probably deeper than past situations. Sometimes she likes to look back at the past and just indulge on how her daughter and Santana have grown together.

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><p><em>"MOMMY MOMMY! I made a new friend! Her name's Santana!" Brittany chimes, bursting through the front doors as she grips a girl's hand tightly behind her. "She is really pretty and super nice!"<em>

_ Brittany's mom turns around in surprise. She hasn't seen anyone but that other blonde girl Quinn Fabray over their house for a play date before. Her daughter drags a petite little girl with exotic caramel skin. She stands with her feet tucked on top of another, looking slightly panicked as she swings her torso side to side with her hands clasped behind her back. Brittany's mother can see something different in this girl than the others; she looks almost lost and broken. _

_ Before she knows it herself, a bright smiles graces her face and she bends down to shake the girl's tiny hands._

_ "Hello Santana! I'm Brittany's mom, it's nice to meet you!" She says as the girl shakily takes her hand._

_ "You too, ma'am..." Santana shyly trails off, biting her lower lip._

_ Brittany shot out her hand and took Santana by her arm. She brings the girl into an abrupt hug before turning to her mother, her hand falling to entwine with Santana's and swings them back and forth energetically._

_ "Mommy, we're gonna go play princess and hero now," Brittany informs her mother quite __openly. "Sanny is my hero. She saved me from these mean bullies today. They tried to smash my sand castle but they ran away cause San roared at them like one of those big kitties do!"_

_ Brittany's mother could tell by the way her daughter gazed at this girl there was something special; a friendship of some sort has sprung she's never seen before. She appreciates how this Santana can make Brittany smile like that. Any mother should appreciate when a single being can make their own child so giddy; any being in reason, of course._

_ "Okay, have fun!" Brittany's mom called before her daughter giggled and yanked Santana up the stairs._

_ Not many kids played with Brittany because she was too immature. They said the things she says annoys them and makes them angry because it's just random nonsense. Even when Brittany plays with some, her mother can hear them say she's stupid or something mean. Brittany soon finds herself running to Santana crying rather than her mother over the time of playing together once._

_ Brittany's mom has never heard Santana call her stupid once and seeing her daughter ran to the girl that provided a protective shield, she would get excited herself when Brittany would shout about Santana coming over. The girl became part of the family in a single week. She slept over for days and watched movies with the family and ate dinner with them like she belonged there; which she did and does. Every time she see's Santana and Brittany together, Brittany's mom can't help but smile at their blossoming relationship. They were and are one of a kind; two souls swimming in an ocean of their own. _

_ When Artie showed in the picture, it's safe to say Brittany's mom wasn't too pleased at all. In fact, she began to make up lame excuses so the boy couldn't come to their house sometimes. She will always stand firmly on Santana's side and the moment she saw that boy wheel into the home she knew why he was there. Her daughter would give her pleading glances that begged she meant otherwise but she knew it had to do with Santana no matter what. With Brittany, everything's about Santana._

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><p>Santana waits on the frigid sidewalks as the student body arrogantly shoves their sloppy way into the supposedly educational building standing behind her. She rolls her eyes at the passing jocks clearly eying up her body, crossing her arms over her chest to block any possible view. Cool relief washes out her dry, parted lips in a sigh when she finally spots Brittany's mother driving her daughter up to her.<p>

"Santana!" The blonde woman calls out joyfully, rolling down her window as she came to a stop before the girl.

"Hey! I'll go get Britt's wheelchair," Santana fakes a smile the second she spoke the word 'wheelchair'.

She goes around the back and lugs out the metal object from the trunk. Opening it, she slams it to the polished streets before neatly wheeling it up to the door. Brittany moves her functioning torso to open the door and reach out for her loving friend. Santana takes her arms, carefully bringing her into the seat.

"Thanks for the drive, mom!" Brittany shouts out before Santana begins to gently wheel her towards the school.

Brittany's mom cheerfully waves at them as she watches her daughter enter the building. She drives off with a genuine smile on her face.

"Want to tell me why I woke up alone this morning?" Brittany inquires, craning her head to look disappointing at Santana.

The Latina's dark eyes are staring absently ahead of her as she wheels the girl, making sure not to look down at the blonde. Some students notice Brittany's in a wheelchair, some don't bother, and some simply just don't care. Santana gulps down the words in her throat and walks on.

"I had to go home and get ready," her voice gets a little low and raspy when she lies to Brittany, shrugging with her words.

The blonde looks back down at the floor moving below her immobile feet, ashamed of herself and Santana. She's lying to her and she knows it but she also knows why Santana wasn't there when she woke. Brittany holds herself together and stands to her word. If Santana can say it all the time, so can she.

_"I can't."_

_ Santana pauses, her brows scrunching in a knot. Did Brittany just really say what she thought she said? She couldn't have, she stated it so simply. Where had all the emotion gone?_

_ "W-...What?" she lightly asks, disbelief written shallowly on her face._

_ "You heard me, Santana," Brittany begins, looking more mature than ever. "I can't because I know you won't make us public and you'll go back to your fake 'sleeping with puck' get up really when I know you two are playing call of duty together."_

_ Santana either can't find any words to say or just can't say them. She questioned herself and the fact that Brittany might be right. There has to be an option open, any option. _

_ "What if-?" She doesn't get a chance._

_ "No. We're either together or we're not, Santana. I mean it. And at least I give you a choice. You never gave me one..."_

_ "But, Britt-" Santana tries to reach for Brittany's cheek but the girl turns away._

_ She recoils her hand back to herself and holds onto it desperately, tears spilling out her eyes. Her body shakes with the harsh rejection inflicted upon her. Brittany notices and looks back at Santana, her own eyes glossy as well._

_ "You know how much I want to say yes," she whispers, running a hand through her thick hair. "You know."_

_ Santana leans into Brittany's warm hand. She almost can't help it; it's like second nature to her. _

_ "No I don't," Santana whispers back painfully. "Not anymore..." _

_ Santana says the exact right words to break Brittany's heart as she has done times before._

_ "Come here," Brittany softly orders, wrapping her arms around Santana's waist and pulling the girl on top of her._

_ Santana pools into the warmth their bodies share. They fit together so perfectly she wonders how they could ever separate. A cozy sensation trickles up her and she settles more deeply into Brittany. She enjoys the night while she can because tomorrow she's going to prove her wrong. This time nothing is going to hold her down._

"Britt, my legs are so tired!" Santana whines out, trying her best to act weak at the knees as she slouches forward on the handles.

Brittany looks up at her with deep concern, as gullible as they get. She runs a comforting hand down Santana's arm. Santana shivers at the spark.

"You can sit on my lap if you want to, San?" She offers, spinning her chair around to face Santana.

The Latina confidently grins and places herself on Brittany's lap. She swung her legs over the side of the wheelchair, circling her arms around the girl's neck possessively. Brittany begins to happily wheel them to Glee club, oblivious to Santana's obvious intentions.

"Gosh you're so strong, Britt," Santana swoons, resting her cheek on Brittany's shoulder blade.

More and more students begin to notice these intimate touches and watch carefully. Soon, a crowd gathers behind the two girls, observing their every movement. Santana begin to slightly panic, a cold sweat dripping down as she takes a wistful glance at the gathering attention before whipping her head harshly back to Brittany. She internally thrashes her emotions around and tell her to just do it. Just fucking do it. It's not that hard. But it is.

She has to do it; it's now or never. All the Glee students are lined up along the wall in anticipation for Brittany's return, almost the entire student body is behind them, and the doors to Glee club are only getting closer. Adrenaline races through Santana's body with all the pressure and irrational thought. She looks and sees Puck, Rachel, and Quinn nodding at her. She turns and sees Marissa bouncing in the crowd, biting on her lip as she smiles and nods too. No turning back now. She takes a deep breath, attempting to relax her inflamed nerves. It's not really working though.

"Brittany."

"Yeah?" Brittany asks, turning her head only to be silenced by Santana's luscious lips to her's.

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><p><strong>OH SNAP. OH SNAP OH SNAP. I DID. I JUST DEEEEED!~ Review please!<strong> For the next chapter will be quite intense. Have I got something for you guys. I want this realistic.


	13. The Storm

**Omg I am so sleepy. I just had my first play and it was a rush! Glad I finally got a chance to upload this chapter, took forever. Well whatever I am back. Read and review! Party party party!**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><span>#::#::#::#<span>_  
><em>

_"Aspire to be a hero than merely appear one."- Baltasar Gracian_

**~#::#::#::#~**_  
><em>

Silence.

An endless, painful void of silence surrounds the perimeter around the two kissing girls. No one knows how to react, not even Brittany. For the first time ever, Brittany wasn't already kissing back. The only time anyone has ever seen them kiss was when they were intoxicated at night parties. This kiss is sober and filled with indescribable emotions most students have never witnessed before.

Santana finally pulls away, gauging only Brittany's reaction. The blonde still has her eyes closed as she licks her lips with the tingling aftershock Santana always leaves her with. A few annoying whistles and arrogant "ews" accompanied by "gross" could be faintly heard. Santana didn't listen, it took all of her strength but she still wouldn't spare a glance the crowd's way. Brittany gradually opens her gorgeous blue eyes and gazes into Santana's deep chocolate ones, drowning in a pool of euphoric lifting.

"Brittany S. Pierce," Santana begins, never once breaking the precious eye contact between them. "You've made me the happiest girl in the world whenever I cried. You were always there for me and you'll always have me. I promise nothing will hurt you ever again- not as long as I'm here. I need you to be mine, Brittany. Beautiful, will you please be mine?"

Santana's strong voice breaks with emotion towards the end but she keeps striving confidently. Nothing can stop her from getting Brittany now, she did everything she had to. Brittany's still gazing right back at her, a radiant smile gracing her face. The crowd leans in anticipation.

"Yes!" She sequels, pulling Santana into her from around her neck. "Yes, yes, _yes!"_

A few students and the whole Glee club howled out their bellowing cheers, clapping their thundering hands in the sweet joy of a needed victory. Before she knew it, Santana got torn away from Brittany and held up in the hallway by Finn, Puck, and Mike. The once large crowd began to break and scatter with some head shaking as they walk to their lockers. Santana didn't give a fuck, they were simply pissed because Brittany is her's now. Marissa quickly joined the Glee club in their celebration as they brought Brittany and Santana into the choir room, roaring her joy just as loud.

"YOU DID IT!"

"WE'RE SO PROUD OF YOU!"

"CONGRATS YOU TWO!"

Santana finally got set back on her feet once they got in the room, automatically making her way to glue herself to Brittany's lap again. Their foreheads are touching as they smile at each other through their loving gaze. Mr. Schue loudly clears his throat to get everyone's attention.

"Uhh ladies, I think it's time we get to work," he says, averting his eyes elsewhere as he speaks awkwardly.

Marissa stands tentatively at the door, debating whether or not it's in her right to walk in. On account of Santana screaming at her last, she is still uncertain of the girl's polar emotions though at the moment she seems as happy as ever. Deciding on simply taking the risk, Marissa strides into the room.

"Hello, I am the illusive Marissa Von Bliecken and I would like to try out for Glee club," she sweetly smiles, watching for Quinn and Puck's reaction.

They don't move, Quinn is too soaked up in that girl Rachel Berry and Puck is with some overweight chick Marissa won't question about. Mr. Schue spins with a grin so intense his face could split in four.

"YES! I mean- we've been looking for some new members," he clears his throat and corrects himself unprofessionally, crossing his arms. "You want to tryout right now?"

Marissa nods excitedly, pulling to look as confident as she can when really she can run away crying at any given moment. She never worked well under the pressure of people, given her anorexia.

"I'm gonna sing 'Hate on Me' by Jill Scott," she exclaims proudly, reaching out to grab hold of the microphone stand.

As if on que, trumpets and drums began to play according to the songs rhythm. Marissa belted her heart out through the entire performance, from beginning to end with the strength of a true singer. At first Mercedes was a little put off because that was her song, but seeing and hearing how great this girl sung changed her thoughts. By the time she finished singing, the whole Glee club had there mouths gaping at her. Puck and Quinn shared subtle smirks, knowing why the girl particularly chose that song.

"Wow," Mr. Schu breathed when the applause diminished. "That was really good!"

Marissa thankfully nods her head.

"Thank you," she smiles, relief never feeling so damn great before. "Sooo- can I join?"

"Absolutely!" Mr. Schue automatically grins, throwing his hands up.

"You can sit next to us, Valerie!" Brittany calls out, patting the seat next to her and Santana.

Santana whispered her corrections in Brittany's ear. Brittany "ooh"ed and nodded, awkwardly smiling her apologies to the ginger. Marissa only smiled greatfully and took a seat next to the two lovebirds. She cringed away a little since Santana is suggestively sitting on Brittany's lap at the moment.

"Looks like a start to a great day already!"

Mr. Schue could never be any wronger. Sure, the beginning of the day was great and amazing. That is until the final school bell rung. Santana stayed at Brittany's house for awhile, just cuddling and watching sappy movies like Titanic.

"Aww, San this movie is so sad!" Brittany cries out, hiding her face into the crook of Santana's neck.

Santana moved her hand into Brittany's hair from around the girl and gently combed through the shining locks. She delicately hushed her, not really watching the movie at all, only focusing on Brittany for the duration. She never did care for movies that weren't horror or gore, nevertheless she would watch whatever Brittany wants.

"It's okay baby, it's just a movie," she cooed, her other hand coming up to soothe Brittany's soft cheek.

Confusion crossed Santana's face when she felt Brittany smile into her skin. The girl was just crying her eyes out moments ago. Brittany pulled away a little to gaze into Santana's eyes happily.

"I like when you call me baby," she says, her smile only widening. "And I _loved _that you kissed me today."

"I want to show everyone that you're mine, Britt," Santana shrugs, acting professional as always.

Brittany leans in to peck the girl on the lips before nuzzling back into her neck. Suddenly, Santana remembers she has to get home because there's school tomorrow. She shoots a glance to the clock and sees it's already ten o'clock. Cursing under her breath, she pulls out from under Brittany.

"Where are you going?" Brittany asks innocently and worried, not wanting her girlfriend to have to leave so soon.

"I have to get home. We have school tomorrow," Santana reminds Brittany, hastily slipping on her boots.

Brittany slumps down into the bed with a defeated sigh.

"School is annoying," she points out, as if it would stop Santana in any way.

The Latina nods, rolling her eyes in exasperation. She rushes over to Brittany for one more kiss before leaving. Too bad the kiss lingered a little too long.

"Britt! Britt- I have to go I'll be here to pick you up in the morning, alright?" She finally breaks their lips, catching her breath.

Brittany only smiles dreamily before nodding and pulling the covers sadly over her face. Santana takes a moment to smile at the adorable girl before she takes off. The second she crept out the door, thunder shook the ground. Her expression fell to something more lethal when the sudden down pour began plummeting to the snow, melting it away slowly. Not to mention the rain came in sizes as big as her fist. She stood on the safe porch, contemplating whether she could make the run home.

"I fucking hate life," she deadpans, sticking her middle finger up to the sky.

The second lightening lit the sky like a firework, she stiffened and took off with wide, scared eyes.

"Fucking fucking FUCK!" She screamed out as she ran through the flooding, empty streets.

"SANTANA!" Called a familiar voice.

Santana spun around to see a sight she never thought she would see before. Artie came rolling by, pushing all his weight with the chair as he tried to catch up to the speeding Latina. Santana watches him with a look of pure disbelief. She asks herself is this was really happening.

"Can you help me get home?" He asked desperately over the rain, glasses fogged from the frigid air. "Please?"

Santana couldn't help but have to think about it. I mean, this is the guy that got with her girl after all. It's hard to decide though, since he's crippled and that would be cruel. Brittany has changed Santana for the better though.

"Okay, where are we going Wheels?" She asked, gripping the handles of the wheelchair. "Why the hell are you even out now?"

Artie didn't know how to respond for a second. Santana is actually helping him right now. He cleared his throat when he began to feel like an idiot.

"I was trying to get home from my guitar lessons! It's right down the block! My home is a little past the old oak park!" He yelled over the rain again, pointing forward.

"Alright," Santana grunted, quickly wheeling him forward in the rain.

She ran, pushing him as fast as she could. Rain flew up from where it was pooling around them as they rolled, creating waves around them in the streets. Even though they were slight enemies, they both threw their heads back and howled with laughter. Artie thrashed out his jazz hands as Santana shoved her body to run quicker and nimbler. The waves increased with their laughter.

"Shit!" Artie laughed when they almost slipped on a lone rock they knocked over in the street.

Santana's eyes went wide as she just fixed the chair last second, saving Artie from a rough fall to the concrete.

"I fucking hate the snow!" He roared, crossing his arm.

"_Tell _me about it!" Santana laughed back, slowing a little to catch her breath with dwindling energy.

"You know, Santana, you're actually pretty cool when you're not trying to kill me," Artie admits, looking up at the girl.

"Yeah, I know," Santana grins cockily to herself. "Should have kept your dirty paws off my girl."

Artie held his hands up in defeat.

"Well, look at this shit!"

Santana froze in the street, tightening her grip around the handles. It wasn't just any voice that said that, it sent uncomfortable shivers down her spine. Her hands slipped off the handles when her grip got too tight and slippery from the pouring rain. She slowly turned her head to see a group of jocks, all holding up pocket knives that reflected off the moon with a deadly gleam.

Her stomach dropped. She should have known better, they fucking live in Ohio. They could kill her if they wanted to. Right now, she's helpless.

"What is it, Santana?" Artie asks, turning his wheels to face the girl and the dangerous group of jocks.

He instantly stopped wheeling and stiffened in his seat. The looks on the boys' faces didn't appear too friendly at all and their intentions are clear. One of them has their arm around a long ladder, holding it horizontally and closed. Santana stared ahead at the familiar jock from the party days ago. He devilishly grinned back at Santana, pointing his knife behind him at the guy holding the ladder.

Right away, the random jock set the ladder up and began to walk forward to Santana. She felt her heart begin to beat rapidly in her chest, nearly ripping through her rib cage in fear. Artie and her have no idea what to do and being paralyzed in horror doesn't help. Running won't do a thing either.

"Try to get your asses out of this and we'll fucking cut you dyke and that cripple too," the jock from the party threatens, another jock grabbing Santana by her arm.

The defenseless Latina got shoved to her knees down in front of the ladder. Her hair got roughly pulled back by a big hand, making her eyes look up to where the ladder lead to: a telephone line. Eyes widening in fear, a thousand useless prayers chanted in her head as tears began to stream down her face along with the pelting drops of rain. She's never been so petrified in all her life.

"Climb."

The command came simple but demanding. Her hair got let loose though her head was pushed straight into one of the steps. A slight echo rang from the step as her forehead collided with it, her hands flying to shield her head as she clamps her eyes shut in pain.

"Move and I'll kill you," a jock whispered in Artie's ear, the boy quivering as adrenaline pumps through his veins.

He looks pleadingly at Santana, wanting nothing more than to go save the girl. He wished he has his legs now more than ever- and means it too. Santana's misty breaths came out ragged as she proper herself up on her knee.

"I said. Climb. Up." The jock spat out between his teeth, picking up Santana by her hair once more.

She cried out and tried to get his grip off her hair but she is too weak. She is always a little too weak, it seams. When she felt one of the knives on her back, she quickly gripped onto the ladder and went all the way up to the top, nearly slipping off at some points. Suddenly, the ladder began to move from underneath her. Her heart nearly stopped as she leaned forward and desperately grabbed for the electric line.

The second her hands gripped onto the thick, rubber material, the ladder collapsed from underneath her with all the jocks laughing as she dangled from above. She cried out when she feels her hands loosen before clasping the line again, rain pouring around her and making her clothes heavy. Tears stream down her face as she tries to keep her eyes shut so she can't look down. Then, she did.

"PLEASE!" She cried out, attempting to kick her way to balance in the sky, holding onto the lines as if they were her life line.

"GET HER DOWN SHE'S GOING TO FUCKING DIE!" Artie roared out forcefully, fucking all proper rational thought and driving for the jocks.

Lightening cracked in the sky and Santana cried out again, shaking with fear as her arms grow tired. She can't let herself fall though, even if she makes it she'll get injured or the jocks will slash her. She has absolutely no way out.

One jock caught Artie by the arm and threw him out of his chair. He roughly thudded to the moist soil, dirt smearing across his face. Another jock was about to head towards him to beat down his crippled body until a large metal object swung and hit the back of his head.

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE I CALLED THE COPS!" Marissa roars out, bring the ladder over to where Santana dangles. "YOU GUYS BETTER FUCKING RUN BECAUSE EITHER WAY YOU ARE FUCKED!"

Just like that, all the jocks sprinted off into their trucks and bolted off into the endless streets. Marissa has yet to call the cops, though. Before she does anything she knows she has to get Santana down and safe first. Setting up the ladder, she carefully aligns it and climbs up until she can get a hold around Santana's waist. The girl shakes with fear and freeze in her arms as she guides her to the steps.

"Santana, are you okay?" She asks, concern thick in her voice.

The Latina can only violently shake her head as she clings to the girl's hand, slowly going down the ladder with her on opposite sides. Her breaths are still hoarse and sore as she rapidly tried to steady her racing heart. When they finally reached the bottom, Santana clumsily ran to Artie and fell by his side.

"Are you okay?" She asked through her tears, checking his body for any scraped.

"Woman, worry about yourself. Don't worry about me, I am fine. Are you okay?" Artie sternly insists and asks, scanning Santana for any other injuries.

Santana sadly smiles and nods. She turns back over to see Marissa steadily walking to her. Jumping up to her feet, she runs to the girl and jumps up to wrap her arms and legs around her, knocking them both over.

"Thank you! Thank you," she breathed, nearly choking the girl in her hold.

"Calm down. Breathe. I have to get you both to my place," Marissa says, running her hand across Santana's forehead comfortingly as she shook.

It was going to be a long night.

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><p><strong>It is 1 48 a.m. I AM GOING TO BED. peace. review paarreeeze? make me smile?<strong>


	14. A Sad Brittany

**Omg okay I give up on the quotes before the story for this chapter I'm feeling a little lazy. Got VIP tickets to see Glee Live 3D tomorrow and I'm going to die. So, it was nice knowing you all. You're all sexy. Anyway, so yeah here the chapter. DON'T WORRY, Marissa has a reason for begin the hero all the damn time. And this is a Brittana fic. Baha I'm so bored. I hope you guys enjoy the chapter! READ AND REVIEW!**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><strong>~#::#::#::#~<strong>

Simplicity; the state, quality, or instance of being _simple. _Simple actions flow as easily as a gentle stream. To turn your head is a simple movement, you're just turning your head. If all simple actions are so basic, why is it so hard to reach a state of simplicity? Santana thinks of nothing but these questions as she lies lazily on an unfamiliar bed with rough springs. She longs for a simple life, a wish that can never be achieved. No matter, she'll just make the best of what she can.

What- where is she anyway?

Jerking up instantly, she sat on the bed with a bewildered face. The room she's in is completely empty with the exception of this worn mattress on the floor. That old mattress with a few shreds on the corners and springs dented with a coppery rust inside. Not to mention her head was pulsating with a sharp pain every time she tried to look somewhere around the boring room.

"Hello?" Santana called out, her musical voice echoing down the barren hallways.

There was no response. It was completely silent until stampeding feet stormed up the stairs. Santana's palms fisted around the thin sheet covering her legs. She could recall all the events that occurred last night and fear shot through her. Then, she saw long ginger hair fall out from the side of the open door frame

"You're up!" Marissa cheered with a toothy smile.

Santana has to admit the girl can be really cute sometimes. Other times, she can be a monster.

"Yeah," Santana grunted, rubbing the back of her hair. "How did I even get here? Did you- save my ass. _Again?"_

Marissa blew her cheeks out like a puffer fish and shrugged before nodding. She indeed did save Santana for the second time.

"You bet your butt! Looks like you owe me again, Missy," Marissa playfully winked before lightly stepping into the room with a twist of her bare foot.

Santana let out a breath and averted her eyes to the lone window shedding light into the room.

"Guess I do," she simply said, shrugging her shoulders. "Wait- I was supposed to pick up Brittany!"

Marissa allowed Santana to freak out for a moment, watching her with an amused smile. The Latina noticed and dropped her panicked nerves, attempting to act chill again. She glared at the ginger as if the girl knew something.

"She's downstairs, I figured I should call her- since she's your girlfriend," Marissa carefully drew out her words, awkwardly fidgeting with her shoes.

Santana eyed the girl, wondering if she spoke the truth. Then again, Marissa has no reason to lie to her. Not yet, that is.

"Cool, uh, thanks again," she faked a smile. "I'm a little dangerous bitch sometimes. It's good to have you stick around kid."

"Kid?" Marissa deadpanned.

"Whatever, I'm fucking hungry," Santana shrugged, lazily getting up.

"Great! I made breakfast!" Marissa bounced with joy, dashing past Santana and down the stairs.

The Latina stood in a haze from when the ginger ran past her so quickly. She shook her head to herself and slowly followed after. Nothing is interesting in this house except the light blue walls, the only color seen. She forgot about school today, as she usually does. Nothing special or important to her.

Brittany sat at the small kitchen table, never seeming so sad in her whole life. Marissa got out some bowls from the cabinets and set them on the table. She dancing over to where the cereal was and drew out a box. For a moment, she stared at the box with an expression of awe. Suddenly, she burst out in a fit of laughter.

"CHEERIOS!" She cried out, holding her gut. "They're cheerios! Like you guys! Oh, man. That's clever."

Santana rolled her eyes. Brittany played with her empty bowl absently.

"I'm quitting tomorrow. Brittany got kicked off for her- condition," Santana choked on the last word but got it out nonetheless.

Marissa looks up thoughtfully at the ceiling.

"Do you think I could be a chee-?"

"DON'T." Santana interrupted her, holding up a hand. "You don't want to be a cheerio. You will die."

Marissa shrugged before nodding. Not that she really cared, she just wanted to meet people. No big deal, not as long as Santana stays her friend.

"Hey baby, what's wrong?" Santana cooed, taking a seat next to the solemn blonde.

Brittany took a look to Santana before staring back down at the empty bowl.

"Nothing, Lord Tubbington just stole my diary again," she shrugged, playing with a silver spoon.

Santana sighed but accepted it. Brittany was always a little out there but she loves that about her. She loves everything about her. Actually, she can't think of a single thing she doesn't like about her. Santana Lopez is honestly in love. It's so frightening but so great. Nothing can beat the feeling. Absolutely nothing.

Sometimes- no- most the time, she feels like she could marry Brittany. She honestly, truly feels she could spend her life with her. There have been times before she has contemplated getting a ring and eloping to New York. Now that the opportunity is open, why not? She shook off her ridiculous, impulsive emotions and smiled at Brittany.

"You're beautiful, you know?" She whispers, gazing into Brittany's blue eyes.

Brittany looks away and nods, gnawing on her silver spoon. Marissa sensed something between the two and got out the milk.

"LOOK! I got the milk! Nowww, who want's cheerios?" Marissa sings, slamming the two objects down on the table to distract both the girls.

She was successful, of course. Though she felt bad, something is definitely up with Brittany and it just can't be her cat. Things like that don't happen in life. She told herself whatever is going on, she must find a solution. For her friends, she will find a way to make them work out.

"Don't you have to go to school?" Santana finally asked, looking at Marissa skeptically.

Marissa looked around her home nonchalantly, thinking over whether she should go or not. She decided on skipping. Rules are made to be broken, right?

"I'm actually going shopping to design my room today," she grins coyly, chowing down her cereal. "You guys are welcome to stay just- don't fuck in my house, please?"

Santana's face flushed automatically before she glared at the girl. Brittany never stopped staring out the window.

"Listen, Ginger, it's not like that," Santana grunts, taking a mouthful of cheerios. "We are in love! Like, doves and all that shit. Whatever. Okay, fuck school I might die. Britt, wanna go to the park?"

Brittany only nodded before finishing her cereal. Santana eyed the girl nervously, wondering what was really up. Marissa observed both their actions carefully, taking in every ounce of detail their faces' bare. She needed to think of something- anything. Suddenly, it hit her.

"We will be right back, Brittany," Marissa smiles, grabbing Santana's arm and yanking her away.

Santana hisses at the girl and rubs her arm when they get far down into the next room.

"The fuck?" She grunts, clearly annoyed.

"Prom."

Santana looks at the girl in obvious confusion. She must be insane.

"What about prom?" She asks, averting her eyes around the room.

Marissa palmed her forehead before rolling her eyes. Santana just needs to listen for once in her life. It's not that hard.

"Brittany looks a little down, prom is in three weeks, ask her to it," she insists, pulling at Santana's arm again. "Awww do it on the playground, that would be so cute!"

Santana thrashes her arm away from the demanding girl and glares at her darkly.

"I don't even know what she's getting all pissed about," she mumbles. "I'm not good with these lovey dovey emotions, you know. And I'll ask Brittany when I'm ready! Don't tell me what to do, Ginger."

Marissa heavily sighs and drops her head in defeat. Maybe she really is in no position to tell Santana what to do with her love life. She just merely wants both her friends happy.

"Whatever, let your girlfriend be miserable. I'm going shopping," Marissa shrugs, walking off.

Santana stands alone in the empty living room, thinking over her past conversation. Prom _is _cutting close and she really does want to bring Brittany. No, she will bring Brittany. She just doesn't know when or how she's going to ask her. It should be something special and romantic. Right?

Flowers. Flowers are always special and romantic. She can pick them at the park too, how convenient. Banishing the thought for the meantime, Santana walks back over to Brittany's side. The girl still sits sadly in her seat, gazing out that same damn window. What was so special about that thing, anyway?

"Hey Britt Britt, wanna go to the park?" She coos into the girl's ear, running a hand through her hair.

Brittany glumly nods and spins around to face Santana. There are tears in her glossy blue eyes. Santana hates it when Brittany cries.

"What's wrong, baby?" She murmurs, her voice laced with deep concern.

Brittany sniffles before turning her head away- again. Santana got tired of the averting and grabbed Brittany's chin, carefully bringing the girl to face her. She gazes at Santana with a pathetic, innocent appearance. It breaks Santana's heart into little shattered pieces.

"San, Valerie called me last night and- and she told me everything. I- I wish I could have been your hero," the blonde lowly cries, her torso quivering with her tears.

Santana took a sharp breath at the memory. It sure wasn't her most pleasant of nights. In fact, all her pleasant nights are spent with Brittany; no one else can make her nights. It's silly for Brittany to fret over something like this. Santana understands Brittany couldn't do anything. She only wishes she could have kicked some ass like she used to.

"Shhh, baby. It's okay, it's okay," Santana comforts Brittany while peppering kisses across her face. "Don't cry. I hate when you cry."

Brittany sadly smiles, nuzzling her face into her girlfriend's neck. She's so happy she can finally call Santana her girlfriend. It means the world to her and every beat is worth it. She only wishes she could have been the one to take the hits instead of her precious Santana.

"There are just so many sad things, San," Brittany sniffles, whimpering into the girl's neck. "I just want to love you. That's all I want..."

Santana sadly smiles and gently nods her head. She understands Brittany, everything she wants and needs. All her breaks and highs; everything about the blonde. Brittany is a little broken right now, maybe Santana should take Marissa up on her idea.

"Let's go to the park, c'mon," she coos, going behind the blonde to wheel her out.

They made their way to the park within minutes, wheeling to a stop near the firetruck red slide. Santana leaped onto the playground and perched herself up at the top like an adventurous child. Brittany watches her curiously when she sees the girl scanning the whole perimeter for something.

"San, what are you doing?" She asks, coking her head to the side in wonderment.

"Nothing."

Brittany shrugs and looks down at the grass, wishing she could slip her bare toes into the moist soil and have the green grass tickle the pads of her feet. She thanks god for the rain so now only little snow remains, it was pretty but it got annoying- and it almost killed her. Her train of thought gets cut off when Santana twirls down the slide and runs across the park.

"San?" The blonde calls, leaning in her chair to watch the girl go.

"One second, Britt!"

Brittany huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. She still is so sad and not just for the unsuccessful hero reason. There is so much more to be miserable about. She just doesn't know how to break it to Santana without having the girl rampage like she does. The Latina was before her before she knew it, down on one knee.

Above, the sun gleams down on the side of Santana's face, lighting up her dark eyes and rimming her luscious hair with a glistening halo. Below, the green grass glitters with dew and waves in a gentle breeze. In her palm, Santana gripped a few matted daises shakily. She looks extremely nervous for some reason- so does Brittany.

"Brittany, will you please be my prom date?" The Latina husks out, clearing her throat as her face flushes a deep tint of red in the light of day.

Tears pool in Brittany's eyes as her heart crumples to pieces. Santana's face falls from nervous to devastated.

"Britt- Britt what's wrong?" Santana asks, voice laced with deep concern. "Is it that we can't dance? I don't care. I just want you. With me. At prom. Together."

"Santana- stop!"

The tan girl shuts her mouth and stares at her girlfriend. She can't recall the last time Brittany raised her voice to her. It stung and it stung hard.

"I can't..."

"Brittany we're past that-"

"I can't because I'm moving, Santana."

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><p><strong>Bare with me now, this is just the beginning. Whatever happens, don't panic. Just remember I love you guys and I am not going to be a cruel person to you. Hugs for every reviewer! You guys rock! I'm also thinking of adding songs to listen to. I love music. Whatcha think?<strong>


	15. But The Memories We Had

**Awww I'm so ready! Another kind of long chapter! It's only going to get more intense from here on and ugh there is just so many things going down in my head. Oh man, you guise. You guise. There's a party in the USA. ANYWAY, saw Glee live in 3D. Saw up Naya's tight dress in 3D. Saw her bra in 3D. Died on my friends in 3D. And these bitches kept screaming over Blaine. I like him and all but my ears broke. I don't even care that my mom wants to kill me if I'm lebanese because the moment Naya walked on screen I died. I'm A Slave For You. OH YES. Just saw So You Think You Can Dance with Hemo and Naya. I saw that look you gave Naya, Hemo. I saw it. How about we ditch sloth Taylor and go for Naya? Omg I can talk forever you know what find a way to enjoy this chapter and please review! Tell me about your life I'm so hyper right now. I love you all! I really do! Brittana forever and RIB can't take away my girls! **He better not.

_I own nothing!_

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><p><strong>~#::#::#::#~<strong>

Santana can hear nothing but the rapid pounding of her heart drumming inside her ribcage. Her dark eyes are wide, pupils nearly shaking with fear amongst other vulnerable emotions. No tears came yet, she clenched her jaw tight and swallowed her strength in rough gulps. Uneasy breathes swam in disproportional pushes through her closing lungs. Her fists tightly twist at her sides as she gradually comes to stand on weak feet.

"Britt," she finally breathed, her eyes beginning to water. "What are you talking about?"

Brittany looks up into Santana's desperate eyes with need and sympathy. She reaches out for the girl before she takes a harsh step back, shying away from Brittany's comforting touch. Santana can't find anything comforting about Brittany's touch anymore. The blonde has seen this times before. Only this time, the pain is sharp and precise against her breaking heart.

"San- I didn't want to tell you. I knew you would get mad," Brittany murmurs in defeat, ducking her head slightly. "I just really wanted to be your girlfriend before I leave..."

Santana instantly brings a hand up to cover her mouth as a thousand words and emotions soar through her mind. Brittany basically used her. She came all this way, only to find out her girlfriend is going to move. Brittany isn't just Santana's girlfriend though; Brittany is Santana's everything. She doesn't know whether to be in rage or apathetic or desperate or what.

"When."

It wasn't a question. Santana needs to know when her Brittany is attempting to leave her stranded in isolation. She tries not to get to scared as the reality of the situation at hand hits her. There must be a way to get Brittany to stay.

"I'm not sure, we already started packing though," Brittany admits lowly, letting strands of hair fall in front of her face to hide her shame.

Santana's fists finally go loose, letting the daisies for Brittany fall to the soil below while they settle beside her shoes. Her face is contort with an expression so broken it can nearly kill. Just the simple thought of seeing everything in Brittany's room being moved breaks her heart. She thinks back on everything that has happened there, all the precious memories being put to waste.

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><p><em>Santana lays restless on her back, sunk in Brittany's bed with one arm slung over her forehead as she stares up at the duck-themed ceiling. Her thoughts race about the girl sound asleep next to her. She carefully turns her head, eyes falling upon the beautiful blonde. Her hair is sprawled about the blue pillow she clutches with one firm first, wrinkling the fabric with her clutching fingers. Santana smiles at the girl, wondering what she could possibly be dreaming of.<em>

_ That night was a beautiful night; a vast abyss of stars twinkling in the mystical purple skys like Tiffany diamonds. Brittany's window let illuminant rays from the full moon flow into the room, highlighting her soft features as she slumbers peacefully. Santana can only gaze at the girl in awe. There's something about just laying and seeing Brittany like this that tugs at her heart and sends warm, fuzzy feelings up her senses._

_ On impulse, Santana reaches out and cups Brittany's cheek delicately. The soft pad of her thumb traces across the girl's bottom lip, teasing the velvet skin. Brittany only scrunched her nose in response and flips her body over so her back is to the Latina. Santana takes the open opportunity and shifts on the bed, flushing her front against Brittany's back as she wraps her arms around the girl's waist warmly. She ducks her nose slowly through Brittany's thick hair, running down her neck with affectionate pecks from her puckered lips. _

_ "Mmm, San, that tickles," Brittany lazily smiles, her voice thick with sleep._

_ Santana grins but continues on, angling her head to rub under Brittany's until she's completely under the girl and brushing kisses against her chin. The blonde gets a little more alert and gradually pushes her body up on one elbow, allowing the smaller Latina to get completely under her as she continues to shower her kisses. Brittany gasped when she felt Santana's hand snake up her shirt and onto her flat stomach._

_ "San-!"_

_ "Shh, Britt," Santana lightly interrupts her, soothing the Kashmir skin with her tender palm. "This is something we do. Only us."_

_ Brittany's body tensed with her nerves. She began to grow nervous if Santana wanted to make up a secret handshake and she won't be able to remember it or something. All thoughts of such things were banished the moment she felt the girl's slender fingers trail over the under wire of her bra. She was about to speak Santana covered her mouth with her finger._

_ "Believe me, you'll like this," she coos, carefully pushing her hands underneath the bra to fully hold Brittany's breasts._

_ The blondes mouth dropped open as her eyes fluttered close. Santana took this as a given and rolled their positions, situating herself comfortably on Brittany's waist with her open thighs wrapped around the blonde. _

_ "Britt, I told you not to wear your bra to bed anymore," Santana huskily whispered, her hand going around the girl's back to grab her bra strap skillfully while her other hand massaged Brittany's breast. "Now let's get rid of this..."_

_ Brittany sharply inhaled when Santana unclasped her bra with one hand professionally. The Latina grins at the girl's reactions before sliding down her body. She took the bottom hem of Brittany's pajama top between her teeth, her face more of one like an animal's as she slowly brings the material up and over Brittany's head with her help removing it. The blonde's bra was Santana's next prey._

_ Brittany's eyes rolled behind her head when she felt Santana's nose nudge under her bra, flopping the cloth upward to get an open view of her breasts. The Latina pulled back then, gazing down to Brittany's beautiful globes. _

_ "S-San," Brittany whimpered, feeling exposed and self conscious as she covered herself with two folded arms. _

_ Santana gently took Brittany's arms in her hands and carefully pushed them apart. She gazes into Brittany's eyes now, rather than her body._

_ "You're beautiful, Brittany," she murmurs in a voice so deep with meaning, Brittany almost doesn't know if this is the same Santana she knew. _

_ Before the blonde has a chance to respond, Santana ducks her head down and softly takes one of Brittany's breasts in her mouth. Brittany throws her head back into a pillow, fists tightening around the tangled blankets as she feels her heated core becoming hotter and hotter. She let's out a throaty moan she didn't know she could make before._

_ Santana finally drags the bra off Brittany and quickly returns back to attacking the girl's skin with her tongue. Finally, she licks up to Brittany's pink nipple, the girl moaning out again helplessly. _

_ "San!" She cries out, weaving her fingers into the girl's thick, black locks. _

_ Santana let's out a sultry grunt when she feels Brittany's hands in her hair, pulling her up with need. She gives in and let's Brittany get as she pleases, the blonde drawing her face to her's to lock their lips together. The blonde wastes no time and brings her tongue to roam against the Latina's luscious lips, begging for a desperate entrance. Santana smiles, parting her lips only to have Brittany's tongue dart in that exact moment. They moan in unity into each other's mouths, tongues slurring together in a slow rhythm picking up pace until they're fighting each other. _

_ Keeping Brittany occupied with her tongue, Santana draws one of her hands down the girl's faint abs. She reaches Brittany's waistband, toying with the material before dipping her hand into the girl's soaked panties. Brittany broke away from Santana's mouth, gasping as she arched her body into the girl's teasing hand._

_ "Please," she whimpers, begging the Latina to stop toying with her. "Please, San!"_

_ "Please what, Britt?" Santana playfully responds, moving her fingers over Brittany's slick folds._

_ To say Brittany was dripping for Santana would be an understatement. Being a virgin at the time and having an emotional connection to the girl like no other, Brittany was physically begging for Santana to take her. Just by the way the Latina caresses her body as if she were a delicate flower drove her insane. _

_ "I-inside," Brittany grunts, bringing her own hand down and on top of Santana's to guide her fingers into her folds. "Inside..."_

_ Santana and Brittany both gasp at the feel. The girl is so tight around the Latina's finger and being as wet as she is for her makes Santana moan out. _

_ "Remember Brittany, this is only what _we _do together. No one else has to know..."_

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><p>"San- are you okay?"<p>

Santana finally lets out a deep breath, glaring up at Brittany with tears in her molten eyes. The sun's rays reflect off the tears, making them glisten like stars in the night sky.

"No, Brittany! I'm not alright! Are you even trying to fight to stay? Or is this what you want?" Santana drags out, opening her arms as if she isn't enough for the blonde.

Brittany expression drops with her heart. Of course she would never want this, she just wants to be with Santana. She also wants to be able to dance with her and walk on the beach with her and bike ride beside her.

"Mom said that we're going so I can get my legs fixed. Your dad found a place for us," Brittany tries to explain, pleading for the Latina to understand everything is going to be alright. "I'll be back before you know it."

"Yeah, that's why you have to move all your stuff," Santana shot back hurtfully. "You're so stupid!"

Both of the girl's hearts stopped. Santana swung a hand over her mouth, eyes wide with multiple emotions as she seeks Brittany's face for a response. She can hardly remember the last time she ever dared to call the blonde stupid or immature in any manner.

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><p><em>"You're being stupid!" Young Santana cries out, rubbing the scrape on her knee. "Watch where you're going next time, Brittany!"<em>

_ The little blonde girl stands a few feet away from the Latina in the dark parking lot. They were playing tag at night like that always would at the rundown factory lot. A flickering street light shines down on her dully as she holds her hands to her lips with a shaking body._

_ "I-I'm not s-stupid," she stammers, trying to fight back the tears invading and blurring her sight. _

_ Santana was nearly in rage before she saw the girl's sad expression. It broke her heart the moment she saw it. Staggering to her feet, she carefully made her way to the quivering blonde. Reaching out a comforting hand, she drew Brittany's hands away from her face and held them delicately in her own. She put them both in one hand and brought the other one to Brittany's cheek, catching the girl's eyes._

_ "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it," she apologizes, admitting with a shrug. "I promise I won't say it ever again."_

_ Brittany watches Santana's eyes, searching for a falter in the girl's promise. She was looking for nothing; there was none to be found. _

_ "Pinky promise?" Brittany asked, bashfully wagging her pinky finger in front of the Latina as she took her hand from her._

_ Santana smiled, bringing her hand away from Brittany's cheek to wrap it around her pinky. They both grin at the shock._

_ "Pinky promise."_

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><p>Brittany sadly smiles, her eyes averting to the grass once more. She enjoys the color of it and just the grass itself. It must be sad and fun being grass. You get stomped on all the time but all you need to do is photosynthesize. Brittany is used to a life like that, getting stomped on yet still finding ways to carelessly take energy from the sun.<p>

"I really am stupid, aren't I?" She breathes, resting her hands on the wheels. "Maybe I should go..."

Santana reaches out suddenly and grasps Brittany's wheels, forcing them not to move an inch. Brittany shakes her head, leaning down as hair falls in her face and her back begins to shake with uneven gasps.

"Brittany, you know I don't mean it," Santana offers, crouching down to put a hand on the blonde's cheek. "I'm just mad. I need you here with me, baby. I can't lose you- I just got you."

Brittany keeps her blue eyes staring half heartily to the side, refusing to make contact the the molten chocolate ones. Santana soothes her thumb over the girl's cheek, begging for her to spare a look at her. She's not going to push the girl; she knows she has already done enough damage.

"I need some space," Brittany insists, sitting up and pulling away from the Latina's comforting touch.

Santana's jaw drops. Brittany is going to move away and she wants some _space? _

"But-"

"I'll talk to you later, San."

"Britt-"

"I said bye- Santana."

The Latina stomped her foot roughly to the ground in a manner comparable to that of an unappeased child. Brittany watches her with solemn eyes, knowing Santana only got like that with her. With a final huff, Santana storms off without a glance back at Brittany. She decides she'll just cool herself down back at her house where no one can get her. No one except her annoying yet friendly neighbor Marissa. The ginger should know better than to get near her when she get's in rage.

On her stroll home, she takes a short stop to gaze at a lone street light post. The day is growing older as the sun sets near, down the horizon over the apartment buildings and streets, washing an orange tint over the town and it's strangers with blank faces. Santana trails a hand freely up the street light, feelings the heart she carved into it years ago. She can clearly recall making a path to her house for Brittany under these street light with hearts as she stands before the very first one she carved. Tears poll in her eyes but she finds the will not to let them fall.

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><p><em>"Britt, we're eleven now," Santana scoffs, shaking her head. "You should know your way to my house."<em>

_ Brittany bows her head, hiding her face with her hair. She was never really good at anything but dancing and just that. Santana rolls her eyes, taking Brittany's hand to get her attention. The blonde reluctantly looks up into the Latina's eyes. The girl grins before her as she draws out a pocket knife._

_ "San!" Brittany gasps, jumping away from the girl in the dark. _

_ Santana sighs at the girl's astonishment. She thought Brittany knew she always carried around a pocket knife. She lives in Lima Heights Adjacent for Christ's sake._

_ "No, Britt. I'm gonna carve hearts in these so you can find your way home- to my house," she explains, pointing to a street light. _

_ Brittany gasps, mouth wide open as she gives her bestfriend a toothy smile. She claps her hands together, jumping up and down in her spot with joy and excitement._

_ "That would be awesome, San!" Brittany cheers out, running over to stand directly behind the Latina as she watches her every movement. "I love hearts! I'll know it's you because I love you!"_

_ Santana swallows hard, trying to forget Brittany's words. Sometimes the girl just doesn't know what she's saying. At least that's what Santana tries to make herself think._

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><p>Now Santana is standing before her first heart, feeling the mark she left not only on Brittany and herself but also the town's history. She let's out a cool breath, pulling herself away from the carving as she continues home. Everything will be fine. She tells herself everything will be fine. Maybe she can just move with the girl. At least she can think things over in the safety of her home.<p>

"YOU ARE NOT MY DAUGHTER!"

Santana cringes in the middle of the hallway, stoping her steps and turning to face her enraged mother. Her eyes go wide as she realizes the woman stomping over, a hand ready to slap the girl across her face.

"Ma-?"

"GET OUT!" Santana's mother roars, bringing her hand to thrash against her daughter's face.

Santana's palm breaks out and grabs her mother's before she could roughly slap her cheek. Her grip on the woman's arm twists painfully hard as tears stream in both their eyes.

"Why would you say that, _mother_?" Santana grits between her clenched jaws. "Did you hear something _upsetting? _Is your daughter not everything you wanted in this world?"

Santana's mother glares into her daughter's eyes with a seething hatered. She can hardly look at the creature she gave birth to anymore; it nearly burns her sight.

"You know what bitch? Don't say a word. I ain't listening to any shit you say. I'm in love with Brittany," Santana shrugs, shoving her mother and her arm away. "I'll come get my shit tomorrow. See you then."

Santana's mom can't speak a word, she can only gape at the turn in her daughter's attitude. She shouldn't say her daughter anymore; now the girl is merely another piece of trashing waiting to be sent to the flaming depths of hell along with that Kurt Hummel boy at the high scool. The moment she saw that boy on the Cheerios two years ago she knew he would only be a bad influence. Maybe he wasn't the influence afterall, maybe it was just Brittany.

She's paralyzed as her thoughts race and her heart thumps, not even noticing her daughter storm out the door with three bottles of wine.

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><p><strong>Whoa I feel like the writers of Lost with all these flashbacks. I'm just trying to give you all some insight of what their friendship is like. And I know it seems like a rushed the mother thing at the end but there's a reason for it. Believe me, you have not seen the end of Santana's mom. Nor her dad (on the bright side). Soooo REVIEW and be my friend! Tell me your thoughts, maybe requests, any songs you like? I'm all ears...eyes. Whatever. <strong>Oh shit, next chapter. _YIKES. _


	16. A Horrible Mistake

**Ugh, sorry guys. I'm having a little writers block write now. I promise I'll make next chapter longer this is just really important. Every chapter is important. Like just remember everything throughout the story because it will get super serious, as if it already isn't.**** I'm really excited though! All the action and emotions are coming soon. Like mega emotions and everything. Read and review and ENJOY! OH! And there's just one song you will hear in here.**

**Fly me to the moon **by **Frank Sinatra **

_I own nothing! Enjoy!_

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><p><em>Santana stood alone in a vacant street with worn gravel beneath her bare feet blacker than the darkest night. Around her all the buildings are lit ablaze as their radiant color rim her with an orange tint and shed their scorching heat around her skin. Still, she can't pull her dark chocolate eyes away from the lone mysterious stranger standing before her a few feet away. <em>

_ The feminine figure, a girl, wore a white mask to shield the upper section of her face and a wrinkled yellow bandana around her mouth. Her eyes couldn't go mistakes, a nearly neon evergreen staring into Santana's eyes as if she made her. As for the rest of her attire, the girl wore a simple black tube top and orange baggy sweatpants. Not to mention she had multicolored hair down to her waist._

_ Santana can't avert her eyes away from the stranger's alluring stare, seeming both wary and lethal in their stances. She became so caught up in the staring contest that she could hardly take notice in the mechanical bracelet wrapped tight around her small wrist. The moment see felt and saw it, she instantly looked down to it and examined it's features. She began to wonder what the hell it could possibly be. _

_ Her thoughts were cut short when she heard the girl take a sharp spin around on the gravel with her torn shoes and dart off hastily. Santana didn't spare a moment for another thought, she instantly raced after the girl. Something about her just kept her going; something similar to a magnetic pull. _

_ "Hey! Fucking wait!" Santana roars, thrashing an open palm in front of her as if it could help her reach the girl's flowing hair or something._

_ The girl leaped up, twirling in the night's sky to spin around and face Santana. The Latina gasped, seeing the girl running backwards professionally and still manages to be faster than her. At least she began to catch up the slightest bit. _

_ "Who are you?" Santana yells, anger boiling up her body as she pushes herself to go faster. _

_ In response, the girl shakes her head and turns around to get more distance between them. Santana grunts but continues on, determined to take down this girl for some mysterious reason. She looked over the running girl, seeing an abrupt end to the city. There is no gravel, no floor at all, no fire; nothing but a void of white. A void of nothing._

_ "Watch out!" Santana tries to warn the girl._

_ Suddenly, the girl harshly turned around again. This time, she sprints straight for Santana in a dead-on collision. The Latina tries to seize her feet but she was moving too fast and her heels slide against the ground as the girl races straight for her. Her heart pulses fast in her chest as she gulps and internally prays for life, watching her hair slowly fly around her face as she jerks back. _

_ Before the girl can crash into Santana, she angles her foot against the floor and twists, both her hands flying out to grasp the Latina's tank top as her body dips on the side. _

_ "What the hell!" Santana screams, mouth wide open as she tries to free herself from the girl's death grip._

_ The girl takes one hard tug, lifting Santana off her feet and into the air. Santana tries to grab onto the girl and get back onto the ground but she already threw her straight into the white void of nothing. _

_ Right then, the exact very moment Santana broke into the white abyss, she began to float as though there were no gravity around to push her down. Her body was lifting, black hair swimming around and caressing her cheeks. Then music began to pool into her ears. It was familiar, a Frank Sinatra song. That one Quinn used to sing to her when Brittany was with Artie. She smiled, relishing in the soft tune before she began to sing along._

_ "Fly me to the moon, let me play among the stars...~"_

_ A sensational feeling of bliss tingled up the Latina as she floats freely in the emptiness, slowly nodding her head with the increasing music. It's nice here, really nice; as if there isn't a worry in the world. Santana is free for a moment, simply humming along with the tunes and letting herself indulge and get lost in the sounds. She didn't even notice the bracelet blinking. _

_ "In other words... hold my hand... In other words... kiss me...~"_

_ She gently snaps her fingers, letting her eyes close as she sinks into the purity of everything. She glances down at her hand, seeing the bracelet blinking. Curiosity gently turns her face as she pokes down at it._

_ "What the-?"_

_ All the bliss suddenly dropped into excruciating pain. The mechanical bracelet secured around her wrist began to shoot out sparks, a light on it beeping a bright red. It ran up her body from her arms, burning through her veins and pulsating in her head. She screamed out, throwing her head back as the music only increased. Her hands pry at the device but it is on too tight, there is no way she can get it off alone. She doesn't even know if she can get it off at all. _

_ "FUCK!" She cries, bashing her fist against the painful bracelet. "GET IT OFF!"_

_ "SOMEONE SAVE ME!"_

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><p>Santana flys up into a sitting position, a cold sweat seeping down her face. It's early in the morning, faint dull rays from the sun gradually make their way over the town. There was no music and no more pain. It was all just a nightmare...<p>

"My back fucking hurts," she grunts, rubbing around the little pain on her back. "Rusty springs..."

Santana's heart almost stopped. Rusty springs? That could only mean...

She whips her head around, seeing Marissa laying tangled in the thin white sheets. Her fiery hair is spread across her face and pillow, making a halo around her head. Not to mention she's completely naked and the air smells like intense sex.

"No," Santana breathes, horror washing over her.

She feels the cool air on her skin and knows she's just as nude as Marissa. Defeat falls on her. She should have never drank. She can hardly even remember anything except her mother's screams of disprovable. Look at her now, sitting helplessly next to a sleeping girl she must have sexed mindlessly.

She betrayed Brittany and herself in one of the most worst ways. Repulsion crawls up her throat, threatening to pour out in a back up of saliva. A glint caught the side of her eyes. She curiously turns to see two used needles gleaming in the sun's lighting rays.

"MARISSA!"

"Ughnn- what?" The ginger groans, flopping over on the small mattress and trailing her hands up Santana's bare thigh.

The Latina roughly slaps the girl's suggestive hand away, her sight almost red with fury. Not only is she disgusted in herself but also Marissa for letting this happen. She knows she couldn't have raped the girl because Marissa thoroughly looks like she enjoyed very much what went down with that coy grin on her face.

"Don't fucking touch me," Santana grunts lowly, glaring at the girl. "Do you remember anything from last night?"

Marissa looks up at the girl, perching herself on one elbow. The sun shines in her eyes, making them a clear emerald layer.

"Yeah, you came right through the door. You were drunk," Marissa begins, gazing deep into Santana's eyes as she tries to get across to her. "I'm sorry. I honestly didn't mean for any of this. But- when you came into my house I was already- high. And you just took me..."

Santana suddenly slapped the girl harshly across the face. Marissa gasped, her head whipped to the side from the rough lash. She brought a hand up to caress her own stinging cheek, slowly looking at Santana again.

"You're fucking pathetic," the Latina spat, more enraged than ever. "You shouldn't do that shit! What is your fucking problem you freak!"

Tears pool in Marissa's eyes as the word strike her again and again.

"It's not like you don't have fucking problems too, Santana! God- just look at you! You're a drunk!" Marissa shot back, pulling away from Santana as she slid onto the floor and wrapped her arms around her legs.

Santana stood straight up, stomping over to Marissa and glaring down at her with tight fists. She brought one up, ready to punch the hopeless girl. Marissa quivered, sniffling as she ducked into herself for support.

Finally, a sigh left Santana's lips. Her fist dropped to her side.

"Just because I'm worthless doesn't mean you have to be, Marissa," Santana lowly states, voice thick with shame. "Good fucking bye."

With that, Santana was off, leaving Marissa to sob in isolation and solitude. She is alone and hopeless. Santana is alone and needy, she just can't cope with the possibility of Brittany leaving her. Brittany cries in her room alone, trying her best to move her legs again with a heartbreaking effort so she doesn't have to leave her lover.

Right now, they are all alone and desperate.

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><p><strong>Eh, the chapter ends here on a sad note. Oh well... Gonna start writing next chapter. I'm gonna need a dictionary for this one... Review please!<strong>


	17. Day After

**Wow. So I am a terrible person and I almost totally gave up on this story until dancelikeheya brought it up in a review and I felt really bad. I guess the writers block got so bad because things like "santana wouldn't call brittany stupid." GURL, you know what these characters are going through? anything can slip at this point. this is also an angst story so like... whatever. i will update a lot more and i promise you guys that. just a lot going on. read review and enjoy lol. also, that dream Santana had before was actually nothing. i just watches cowboys and aliens and wanted to write a little thing for fun LOL  
><strong>

_I own nothing!_

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><p><em>"My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return."- Maya Angelou <em>

Tension is high up in the air lurking around the inside of Lima. Everything has fallen to an all time low and is reaching the point of no return. Right now, more than anything, a hero is needed.

"Has anyone seen Santana and Brittany?" Mr. Shue asks the whole Glee club, worry lacing his voice. "They haven't been here for days..."

No one speaks in the club. Artie is too scared to peep a word, not wanting to get killed of course. Quinn decides to take a stand.

"Mr. Schue may I be excused from today's practice?" She politely inquires, eyebrows raised as if to silently tell him something.

Quinn always had a way of doing things. She is a sly girl, in a good way. There is always a way for her to get as she pleases in any situation. Sometimes, she doesn't even need to speak more than one word.

"Sure," Mr. Schue allows, watching her eyes before she exits.

Rachel watches Quinn leave the room, loneliness pouring down on her. Finn turned and smiles at her with a wink that she tries so hard to ignore. Puck sees the reactions between Quinn and Rachel- and Finn for that matter, knowing something is up. He also has his own way of finding out things. Him and Quinn used to make a great team with Santana.

"Santana Lopez!" Quinn screams, nearly knocking down the girl's door as she breaks into her home.

Santana lays a mess on her worn couch, rolled up in a ball with liquor close at hand. Quinn rolls her eyes at the disheveled girl. Storming over to her side, she kneels down and looks attempts to look Santana in the eye. The girl won't budge.

"Baby girl," Quinn coos, brushing the girl's hair with her hand. "Wake up. C'mon San. Talk to me."

In respond, Santana lets out an annoyed grunt and flips over so her back faces the short blonde. Quinn nods to herself, a little pissed off.

"Okay, I just left school for you," she spits, her comforting side dying out. "We're gonna talk and we're gonna talk _now!"_

Before Santana has a chance, Quinn leaps up on her and grabs her hands to push over her head. The Latina yells and kicks, fevershly tugging the blonde off her. They used to wrestle a lot at sleepovers because they acted like little boys when they were little. It reminds Santana so much of the past, she only wishes to go back and change everything.

"Quinn I will hit you over the head with my glass!" Santana threatens but Quinn knows better.

"Oh please, Santana. You couldn't even if you tried!" She shoots back, leaving Santana's hands to attack her stomach.

The Latina instantly drops the glass to the floor. It shatters as the liquor within pours out everywhere. She can't even notice though, she's laughing too hard. Quinn knows one of the few of Santana's weaknesses. Number one: tickling.

"Get off me! I will kill you!" Santana laughs out, throwing her head back as she grabs at Quinn's short hair.

Quinn lightly laughs, glad to see some sort of smile on Santana's face. She leans in to peck the girl on the cheek endearingly.

"There's that smile I love. Now sit your ass down and tell me what's wrong," she demands, sitting up on the couch.

Santana let's a sigh roll out her lips. Quinn is being serious, they do have to talk. She can't hide her feelings forever and especially not from her.

"Brittany's moving," she finally chokes out, looking down at her weak hands in her lap.

Quinn sat there frozen in shock. This can't be happening. Not because Brittany is in a wheelchair but because she belongs here. She can't even imagine the torture Santana is going through right now. Comforting the girl as much as she can, she reaches out a hand to sooth the Latina's arm.

Then it hits her. Quinn doesn't want Brittany to leave. Brittany is everything to this town. She means the world to every last soul she meets. No one wants to let her go. Pulling Santana into her chest, Quinn slowly rocks them back and forth.

"Hey, it's going to be alright. Hold in there, Santana. Just hold in there," she murmurs in the broken girl's ears delicately.

Easier said than done.

Santana thinks back on all that's happened. The constant fighting, that horrible surprise with Marissa. Maybe she truly doesn't deserve Brittany. It's always best to let go. Even when she was little she knew feelings were no good. She hates herself for giving into them.

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><p>The final bell rang in school and Rachel was already bursting out the doors. She scurried through the student body and leaped into her car. Turning on the engine, she backed out of the parking spot and started for Brittany's house. She figured Quinn was with Santana since they're friends.<p>

Thankfully no one was home when she broke into the Brittany's house except the blonde herself. She laying limp on her couch, eating chips as she mindlessly watches the television. Not knowing what show is even on, she simply enjoys the colored pixels displayed before her.

"Brittany," Rachel breathes, gently closing the door behind her.

Brittany's upper body shoots up when she hears her name called. She knows it's Rachel though but still enjoys the company that's not Santana. She can't even think about Santana without her heart breaking. Thinking about how much she must have hurt the girl tears her apart. She doesn't even care that she called her stupid anymore, she cares that she's leaving her on such a short notice. Either way Santana was going to find out and it was best Brittany tell her. If Santana walked into her house and found new people instead of her only lord knows what that girl would have done. Brittany cringes at the thought.

"Hey Rachel," she deadpans a response. "What do you want?"

Rachel frowns at Brittany's sad tone. The most beaming girl in the world is laying before her in a dying light. It's a horrible sight to see.

"I just came over to check up on you. How is everything?" The brunette brightly asks, faking a smile as best she can at the moment.

Brittany looks over to Rachel unsatisfied. Why does anyone even want to bother with her still? All she was good at was dancing and now she can't even do that. She's a pathetic waste of space now and she's not even sure the surgery and operations are going to work. There's has to be a chance though. Is all that time away from Santana gonna be worth it?

"Not good. I'm moving."

That's the thing about Brittany. She can be so blunt about the most dramatic things. It's almost like she's hiding her emotions. Santana must get all the emotions and Brittany just locks them up during the day. Maybe that's how she functions?

Rachel stand behind the couch, staring down at Brittany with wide eyes. Her mouth falls open a little before she collects herself and clears her throat.

"Come again?" She asks, not wanting to believe it.

"I. Am. Moving. I'm gonna go get my legs fixed..."

Rachel did indeed hear Brittany right and it's such a bittersweet fact. The dancer will finally get her legs back and be able to go out on her career but will have to leave her friend and lover behind. Rachel doesn't know all too much about Brittany and Santana's relationship but from what she has seen she knows it's something to cherish. Not many things of quality come from Lima, either.

"I- well. That's good?" Rachel tries to word out, not knowing exactly what to say. "Have you told Santana about this, Brittany?"

The blonde dumbly nods, turning back to her television screen.

"She freaked out and called me stupid. I guess I am because right now I have all these feelings that I don't think exists. Like, I'm so happy but I'm also the saddest little panda in the world," Brittany mumbles more to herself than Rachel as she snuggles into the pillow.

Rachel takes in Brittany's words and almost gasps. Santana called her stupid? These girls truly don't get a break.

"I see. Things haven't gone too well at all," she says. Looking around as if she can find a conversation floating around in the room. "Well, I'm always here for you. You have my number and everything. When are you leaving?"

Brittany looks over at Rachel again. She wants to tell the girl but she can't. She knows she will tell Santana and then Brittany will never be able to go.

Because she is leaving tomorrow night...

"I don't know. Soon I guess," she shrugs, successfully lying to another dear friend of hers. "We have all our things packed upstairs, though."

Rachel nods her head in understanding.

"Everyone is going to miss you, Britt. Especially Santana but also Quinn and Puck. They're going to be crushed. That's how I already feel," Rachel offers, admitting to the blonde. "Promise me you'll keep in contact though. I know we weren't close before but I want to be because you mean a lot to me and everyone. I hope to see you again too- and walking."

Brittany fakes a smile; it doesn't reach her eyes.

"Thanks Rach," she says lowly. "I think I'm going to go see Santana again tomorrow but I don't know. Probably will anyway..."

Rachel nods again, walking over to take a seat next to Brittany. She doesn't know why but something in her stomach is turning and giving her hope that, in the end, everything will be alright. There is always the big battle before love. The long wait, climb of the large tower, ect.

Knowing Santana and Brittany in the short time she has, Rachel has hope for everyone. Because what they have, no one else will in this town.

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><p><strong>on another note AWW marissa got no part in glee at all. now theres that sugar chick. UGh no more charaters we got no room for you here we dont want none. god damnit. so anyway tell me how you liked it. this is jsut a short little thing to get back into the groove of this story.<br>**


	18. I'm Not Perfect

**Soooo I actually had this as a one-shot story BUT I configured it to fit with this story and get rid of the one-shot. I let you guys down and feel like shit so I'm picking this back up and destroying my writers block. Don't give up on me now! Read review and enjoy! Sorry for any mistakes!**

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><p>There was already something off that morning, Santana just couldn't place her finger on it. In the blue sky above the sun rose and the clouds gradually floated like torn puffballs in the sky. At least Brittany always thought clouds were puffballs. Santana never questioned the girl's logic, she just simply swam along with it; anything to make the lovely blonde content.<p>

The Latina lazily rolled over in her bed, hands grabbing at her pillow to slam it's fluffy protection down on the back of her head to block the sun's gleaming rays streaming through her window. She neglects to mention how much she hates the sun, especially when it scorches down on the whole Cheerio squad on practice days. Her thoughts wander to the entire Cheerio's concept, contemplating whether or not to join it for Senior year. Being a Cheerio is a bitch biting on your ass. Anything to be popular, she thought.

When the sun become far too strong for her liking, she rolls out of her bed and staggers to the window. Throwing the shades to block any opposing rays, she grins to herself and slumps back into her comfortable bed. She let's her body sink into the plush and indulge in the regained darkness around her.

Just as Santana was about to fall back into a peaceful slumber, her phone harshly vibrates on the small table near her bed. She lets out a grunt from her gritted teeth. Whoever dares text her at this ungodly time in the morning is asking for a death wish. One of her hands lash out and roughly grip the phone. She leans on her side, bringing the phone to her face with it's bright light stinging her dilating eyes.

Her face scrunches up in confusion. Brittany texted her. That's odd because Brittany never texts her. At least not since last year when their close friendship drifted apart due to a certain disabled boy. Santana can't begin on her hatred for that damn kid. Sometimes she can't even make herself feel bad for him. He proved of his worthiness that one night with the guys. Santana supposed he was a good kid and now she can't hold anything against him. Pushing the thought away, she taps her thumb on the screen to open the message.

[hey san can you meet me at the park tonight?] -B

Santana became further bewildered. What kind of game is this girl playing? She hasn't talked to Brittany since her 'stupid' slip. Her shoulders fall a little, solitude washing over her. To say she missed the blonde and her breathtaking smile would be an understatement. She questions what has happened to them.

Knowing she had nothing going on today, Santana replies to Brittany soon after. She immidiantly texts Brittany back, wanting the girl to know she has her full attention.

[sure what time?] -S

Tapping send, she rolls over a little more to lay on her back once more. Time finally begins to set into her as she slowly lets herself wake and become aware of her surroundings. Her artificial breasts weigh down her chest as they always do, reminding her constantly of her flaws. Luckily she's found a way to ignore the feel over time. Instead she focuses on her hot she looks. That's what matters, right? She's at the point of no return where her life itself is a lie but she can accept that. Shit happens.

[10] -B

Santana decides not to text back, she found out what she needed to. It wasn't always like this. Brittany and Santana used to spend long nights texting each other to no end, seeing who would give out first. They would call one another and talk for unending hours until they fell asleep with their phones next to their heads. That, or Brittany and Santana would sneak out of their houses to meet up. Times change, people change.

Santana always knew this day would come, she just doesn't know if she can handle it or not. At least something felt off. Everything felt off. She kept telling herself she could be friends with Quinn, already thinking about their future from the first night they slept together. God, she may never be able to forget that night. Honestly to her, the best part was the morning after. It's a whole different emotional experience waking up to the most beautiful girl with the bluest eyes in the world.

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><p><em>Glints from the rising sun sprinkled onto Santana's closed eyes, slowly making them flutter open. She felt amazing that morning, as if her entire body was refurbished or purified. There was a warm figure breathing gently under her with their cozy arms wrapped loosely around her waist. Santana could feel silky skin sliding on her fingertips as the familiar body breathes rhythmically with the Latina's hands on their stomach.<em>

_A smile gracing her face, Santana gazes up at Brittany sleeping below her. She faintly bites down on her lower lip as she indulges in the sight of the sleeping beauty. Nothing could make this morning more breathtaking than the blonde does with the sun's rays glistening over her creamy skin. Her sprawled out hair was Santana's favorite part of morning Brittany because it makes a gorgeous halo around her head. The girl looked like an angel in slumber. _

_After taking a good long look to keep in her mind always, Santana leans in to capture Brittany's lips with her own. Gently waking the blonde, Santana grins at Brittany's soft groans but no complaints. She gasped when Brittany suddenly brought her arms up to the nape of Santana's neck and pulled her down into her._

_Moaning when Brittany's tongue plunges into her mouth and slurs around with her own, Santana seeps into the blonde and locks their bodies like puzzle pieces. Brittany breaks away to catch some air, breathing heavily with a smile._

_"Wow, Britt," Santana breathed, gazing at the blonde as she can no longer contain herself. "You are beautiful…"_

_Brittany moves forward and rubs her nose against Santana's in an Eskimo kiss._

_"So are you, San," she replies with a light giggle shaking their bodies slightly._

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><p>Santana lets out a needed sigh as she turns her head to look at the clock. It's only ten in the morning. She has to find something to occupy her for a few hours. It seems she always needs to find something to occupy herself until she meets Brittany. She's used to it, being that she has spent almost her whole life in such a dreary manner.<p>

Nothing has ever been the same ever since Brittany couldn't dance again. She can't push back the fact anymore. Nothing will ever be the same.

Brittany wheels delicately out onto the evergreen grass, the wheels roaming along. Taking an easy breath in of the fresh outdoors air, she exhales and bows her head to look down below her useless dancer's legs. Her pale skin shimmers from the early sun's warm, adorning rays faintly tinting her body.

Squinting her blue eyes in the light, Brittany looks up at the heavenly azure sky. There's a utopia of clouds gradually turning with the revolving Earth. She can recall when she was younger she wished upon a shooting star that Santana and her could go up and play on the pillows in the sky. That was until she developed a fear of heights the moment she went on a Ferris wheel with the Latina. Santana was always there to protect her, though.

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><p><em><strong>Rhythm of Love <strong>__by __**Plain White T's**_

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><p><em>The sugary aroma of cotton candy and heating corn dogs filled the air around all the smiles and stars that night. It was McKinley's annual fair and both Santana and Brittany had snuck out of their houses for an event not to be missed. They had met up on the field and grabbed each other's hands eagerly, Brittany taking the lead by pulling the small Latina towards the bright lights and playful screams. Santana simply watched the way Brittany's luscious blonde hair flows in the air and whips with her every step she sprints. <em>

_"This is going to be so much fun, Sanny! We have to go on every ride," Brittany insists, tightening her hold on Santana slightly. "I'm so pumped!"_

_Brittany brought Santana to every game that night. The Latina had won the blonde one giant stuffed teddy bear she already cherished like a child. They walks around together through the abyss of strangers and familiar faces, Brittany leaned back a little as she hugs the large plush bear on her toned stomach. Her steps got a little sloppy so Santana guided her by their entwined pinky fingers. Brittany smiled a toothy grin as she passed a group of small, jealous children glaring up at her._

_"San- San! Guess what I'm going to name my bear!" Brittany frequently asked, poking at the teenage Latina with her foot._

_Santana rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless. She turned her head to meet the blonde's piercing blue eyes bright with joy._

_"Booboo? Bear-Pie? Lord Teddington?"_

_Brittany howled with laughter, throwing her head and hair back before whipping up to look at Santana. The girl knew her so well but she wasn't correct._

_"No," she cooed, eyes softly watching Santana's face twist with curiosity. "I named it after you, San."_

_The Latina couldn't help but smile at that. When Brittany says words like those it makes her feel all fluttery on the inside, a thousand butterflys soaring in her stomach. She was about to respond but Brittany cut her off with a face of awe._

_"Can we please go on that, San! Oh please!" Brittany bounced, pointing up at a huge wheel with seats. _

_Santana didn't mind rides and Ferris wheels are chill so she simply shrugs and nodded. Whatever makes Brittany happy._

_"Yes! Yes yes yes!" Brittany cries out, stomping her feet up and down in place like a giddy child._

_They went up together, next to be seated since most of the crowd began to die out and go towards the field where fireworks will be soon shot off. Brittany bit her bottom lip with her unending smile, failing to contain at least a ounce of her energy. It only took one more turn of the wheel before an empty seat rolled down, calling for the blonde._

_"Right this way," directed a man working the wheel, opening the gate to let Santana, Brittany, and the large teddy bear in. _

_They plopped down on their seats and waited patiently as the guy chained them in for safety purposes. He was about to leave when Santana grabbed him by his shirt and brought him down to her level. She whispered something in his ear before he grinned and nodded with a thumbs up and a sly wink. Brittany glared between the guy and Santana._

_"You got it, kiddo," he shakes his head with a tight smile, closing the gate behind him and starting up the wheel again._

_They slowly rose up but Brittany didn't notice, she simply kept her eyes glaring directly at an innocent looking Santana. The Latina felt the girl's eyes on her hostily and turned to face her. Brittany was clearly not pleased._

_"What?" She asked._

_Brittany let out a sigh, leaning away from Santana as she hugged her bear and cuddled her face into it's fluff. She knew that Santana knows well what her mistake was._

_"Nothing," she mumbled her response into the fur absently._

_Brittany grumbled into the bear and awaited Santana to apologize, though the girl didn't do so. She tried to get a glance at the girl without being noticed, which lead to her seeing how high up they got. Her face and body almost turned a paper white._

_"Oh my god, San! We're so high up! I don't want to die!" She cries out, pouncing over the little gap between them to get a death grip around Santana. "Hold me, San! Hold me!"_

_Santana lightly chuckled, bringing her arms gently around the petrified girl in a comforting hold. She soothed her back in soft circles and ran her fingers through her silk, thick locks._

_"Shhh, Britt," Santana coos, grinning into the blonde's hair. "It's gonna be okay, I got you…"_

_Brittany continues to quiver into the Latina's cozy embrace, still scared beyond belief. She found she in fact didn't like to be up high like the birds. Birds are crazy. Her feeble hands grasp at Santana's shirt, wrinkling the material in her tight fists._

_"Britt, look," Santana murmurs, pointing up at the sky._

_Brittany slowly turns her head and peeks up at the starry night. Suddenly, vibrant colors burst in the heavens and light up the sky, enhancing the stars and the moon. Brittany eyes open wide in awe as the lights reflect off her blue eyes. She winces at the loud bangs but it's okay because she cringes into Santana. _

_They stayed like that throught the whole firework show, cuddled cozily into one another. Everything was perfect about that night. Below all the seats, staring up at the two lovebirds, the man working the wheel grins up at them before shaking his head and turning to watch the fireworks._

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><p><em><strong>Invisible <strong>__by __**Skylar Grey**_

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><p>Santana let out a heavy pant, spitting out some saliva to the side from her rosy lips as she wiped her scraped knuckles down her sweaty forehead. Working out always seems to make time fly for her so she figured why not. Glancing over at the clock in her basement, she let disappointment slap her to find it is only three in the afternoon. She got nowhere time wise.<p>

Is there truly nothing for her to do anymore without Brittany? She has already wasted most of her summer in hibernation. There is only one way left to throw today away. Santana turns to the liquor cabinet. The only though on her mind is _Brittany Brittany Brittany._ The love of her life Brittany. Brittany her soul mate. Brittany her everything.

Why is it that she can never be perfect? She can't even look into the mirror, at that wretched reflection, and feel the slightest bit of joy she is alive. Why can't anyone just love her? She has no one but Brittany. Why can't that beautiful blonde girl see how much she needs her? Brittany may never know.

Nothing matters anymore. The breaking Latina simply grabs a full flask by the top, throws it up to her full lips, and drinks it down in heavy gulps. She can already feel the faint tingle of intoxication sink in as the alcohol pours down her throat.

Brittany has made it up to the top of the hill at this point, sitting alone on the open field. Wind whips by, letting her hair trail out in a dance through the blue sky. She closes her eyes and let's the purity of nature around her get in. A slight jingle sounds in her ears.

Opening her eyes, she glances down at her wrist. She almost forgot about her and Santana's silver friendship bracelets. Her precious wristlet twinkles in the light as she slowly turns her open palm towards herself. She can't feel the warmth of Santana's hand on hers. Will she ever feel it again? She begins to ponder on all the possibilities for tonight. Santana may never even look at her again. Santana may never even see her again. Brittany's heart clenches.

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><p><em><strong>Perfect <strong>__by _**_Hedley_**

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><p><em>Falling a thousand feet per second, you still take me by surprise<br>I just know we can't be over, I can see it in your eyes  
>Making every kind of silence, takes a lot to realize<br>It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie _

Santana takes weak steps up the grassy hill, carefully watching her feet the whole time. She's sober now but she wishes she wasn't. She doesn't even want to be here. There are so many memories her and Brittany hold. Maybe she is just being negative right now and Brittany didn't text her for that darkly presumed intention. What if Brittany is actually ready to wait for her?

Far off, the sound of a church bell ringing chimes. It's a bone-chilling noise and Santana loathes it. The grim music echoes on as she pushes on. She wants to turn back. Turn back when her and Brittnay were friends forever and innocent. When she still had her father and mother together. Back when everything was okay and Brittany could dance while she sang.

Trying to think as positively as she can muster, Santana stops movement when two pale feet come in sight dangling from a seat. The skin is smooth and creamy as it gleams in the blue moonlight. Trailing her eyes up slowly, the Latina's dark eyes meet Brittany's deep blue. It feels like it's been forever.

"Brittany," Santana breathes, breaking the silence before it's too much to bare.

Brittany sadly smiles to her. That's not a good sign. Santana gradually becomes tense with her nerves. She internally begs Brittany not to do it. Brittany can't do this to her; she will be crushed forever.

"Hey, Sanny," Brittany murmurs, twining her two hands together awkwardly.

Brittany hasn't called Santana that name since the longest time. Santana doesn't know if she should take this as a good or bad thing. She doesn't even know what to feel anymore. All she knows is that Brittany looks gorgeous tonight, rimmed by the full moon above. She looks like an angel; she always does to Santana.

_And as long as I can feel you holding on  
>I won't fall, even if you said I was wrong <em>

"So- you texted me?" Santana offers, digging her foot into the soil.

Tears begin to pool in Brittany's sad eyes. Santana's eyes go wide as her protective nature takes over before she can realize. This isn't happening. This can't be happening.

"Britt, what's wro-"

"I spent all day here," Brittany interrupts her, gazing deep into those charcoal orbs. "Santana."

The Latina's face twists with confusion. Brittany's tone is trying to tell her something she can't get to. For the first time in a while, Santana doesn't know what Brittany is trying to say. She knows deep down she does, but she refuses to accept it. She has always been stubborn anyway.

"I've been thinking…"

Hope, dread, and almost every other emotion in her heart spirals within Santana. She helplessly stares into Brittany's eyes, silently begging that the hope in her will prevail. All that time they had together can't have been a waste. They have so much more to do together in life.

"I think it's time to tell you that I'm leaving…"

"What? You said that you- _no! _I- I am so sorry for everything that's gone wrong. You mean everything to me and I don't even have the words to express-"

Brittany stopped Santana by hopelessly lunging forward and holding onto her in a desperate embrace. Santana falls down with Brittany's body impacting her's. She clings to the girl, letting the wheelchair topple over as they sit on the grass in the night.

_I'm not perfect, but I keep trying  
>'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start<br>I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave  
>Was it something I said or just my personality? <em>

Santana can tell by Brittany's hold it's over. She knew it because she knew everything about the girl as she does her. Tonight was inevitable. And it's just begun.

"Brittany please! I love you- I need you!" Santana cries out, insisting brokenly. "You can't leave me. Not like this, Britt."

Brittany gently weaves her fingers into Santana's thick, black locks. The feel is so familiar yet so distant. There's no more sparks at touch, no more emotions to express towards the petite girl. It's heartbreaking.

"San, I have to," the blonde tries to lightly explain, gripping the girl tighter knowing her reaction all too well. "For us."

Santana goes ballistic.

"NO BRITTANY! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT" The Latina roars, scraping her nails down the blonde's arms now. "JESUS, BRITTANY, YOU'RE EVERYTHING!"

Brittany hisses in pain but takes it. She won't let Santana get away. Not just yet. She needs her. For now, while she can still hold her.

_Making every kind of silence, it takes a lot to realize  
>It's worse to finish than to start all over and never let it lie<br>And as long as I can feel you holding on  
>I won't fall, even if you said I wrong <em>

"Santana," Brittany murmurs as the Latina tosses their bodies around. "Sanny, please listen to me…"

She remains as calm as she can, keeping her tears at bay. They rim her eyes though she refuses to let a single drop fall. She has cried one too many times over the girl.

The tan girl eventually grows weak and tired, energy completely drained from her body from physical and emotional exhaustion. She simply lets Brittany hold her and rock them soothingly back and forth on the field. The night is so silent. She can hear Brittany's heart beating in her chest with her head laid on the girl's chest due to height difference even as they sit.

"Brittany," she tries, mumbling into the girl's silk skin. "Please stay with me. I promise I will give you everything. I just need the time…"

"I'm not dying or anything. I'll come back for you. I will always come back for you," Brittany vows, combing through the Latina's hair.

_I know that I'm not perfect, but I keep trying  
>'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start <em>

Santana catches a glint in her eyes. She glances down, finding her silver bracelet wrapped loosely around her wrist. Within Brittany's hold, she manages to reach down and tug off the cold wrislet. She grips it in her palm for a second, feeling it for the last time. Brittany looks down, watching the Latina grasp something in her twisted fist.

"Sanny, what's that?" She innocently asks, stopping their rocking.

A soft chuckle rumbles within Santana. She can hardly believe this is happening right now. It all seems like a horrible nightmare. She knows it's real though, every second of it.

"Just let me go," she persuades the blonde. "I promise I won't run away."

Brittany hesitates but loosens her grip. Santana shoves herself back and out, staring down at her fist before her. She lends out her hand, rolling it into an open palm and exposing the gleaming bracelet. Brittany gasps, looking up at Santana.

"Wha-"

"Take it."

It wasn't an option. Santana demands Brittany takes their friendship bracelet from her; their friendship.

_I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave  
>Was it something I said or just my personality? <em>

"No. Santana please don't do this-"

"TAKE THE FUCKING BRACELET BRITTANY!" The Latina orders as she stands with a harsh stomp to the ground.

Brittany begins to shake in her spot but will not give in. They will still have a friendship. She doesn't know what she is without Santana. It was always Santana and Brittany, they were never individuals. Tears stream down her face and she doesn't try to stop them anymore. She doesn't have the strength to do anything.

Santana glares at her now, her teeth slightly bared. She's grown tired of these games.

"Fine," she spat, drawing the bracelet back in a fist.

Brittany looks up at her with hope in her eyes. Could they actually still be friends?

Any hope left dies that instant Santana pulled her hand back and flung the bracelet as far as she could behind Brittany. The blonde doesn't turn around, she's too scared the girl will run away. She promised she wouldn't though.

"I can't believe this," Santana began, rage completely consuming her. "This is fucking ridiculous. I just came out to be with you and you leave me with nothing! I don't want your pity. You're leaving me just like everyone else. I knew it, I knew it. Just like everyone else."

Brittany takes a long, deep inhale. She can't though, she can only gasp for air between her wracking sobs.

"That's it! Go fucking cry to someone else!" Santana spits, crouching down to roughly grip Brittany's cheek and force the girl to look at her.

There are tears in both their eyes, streaming down their cheeks in unity.

"Look what you've done," Santana breathes, her eyes begging Brittany's to see her broken emotions.

_When you're caught in a lie and you've got nothing to hide  
>When you've got nowhere to run and you've got nothing inside<br>It tears right through me, you thought that you knew me  
>You thought that you knew <em>

"N-No, I'm not stupid. You called me that. And I'm not. Leaving you is the smart thing," Brittany insists, looking straight into Santana's eyes. "I was stupid to have ever loved _you. __You're trying to hold me back from my dreams! I'm dancing! And I don't need you to do it!__"_

Santana harshly slaps Brittany across the face before she even knows it. All she can see is Brittany's head whipped to the side with a fresh red swelling on her tinted cheek. She instantly draws her hand to her chest, her other hand gripping it like it were the devil connected to her.

"Oh. Britt."

She can hardly conjure up words to speak. There's nothing left to say at this point; there's no return now. Not only from Brittany but now Santana can't even forgive herself.

"I-… I-…"

Santana can't even apologize. Instead, she spins on her heels and darts off. She runs far away, as far as her body can will. There's too much adrenaline pulsing through her. She can never look at Brittany again. She's become a monster. She never wanted Brittany to see the monster she is. Santana can never have anything.

_I'm not perfect, but I keep trying  
>'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start<br>I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave  
>Was it something I said or just my personality? <em>

Brittany eventually finds herself crawling desperately on her hands and knees through the field for Santana's bracelet. Relief washes over her when she finally finds it gleaming in the night like a signal. Tears roll down her cheeks as she quickly grabs it and brings it to her chest. Her grip on it tears into her skin with her nails. She doesn't even feel the pain; she can only feel the loneliness settling in without Santana.

Her legs are woth it worth it. She wants to tell herself that. She needs to tell herself that.

Because she just lost her soulmate.

Her best friend.

Her first love.

Her everything.

_Little Brittany reaches out her tiny pinky to entwine it around Santana's. The Latina girl giggles at the spark and looks up at Brittany with cheerful eyes._

_"Sanny, are we friends forever?" Brittany innocently asks as they sit beside one another on the field, gazing up at the stars._

_Little Santana wiggles her feet, taking a thoughtful moment. Her eyes remain up to the night's beautiful sky before she turns to look back into Brittany's eyes._

_"You bet," she grins playfully._

_Brittany ducks her head into Santana's shoulder, nuzzling into her coziness._

_"You promise?"_

_Santana nods her head against Brittany's._

_"I promise."_

_I'm not perfect, but I keep trying  
>'Cause that's what I said I would do from the start<br>I'm not alive if I'm lonely, so please don't leave  
>Was it something I said or just my, just myself<br>Just myself, myself, just myself _

Santana collapses to her weak knees, scraping the skin against the concrete. She is shaking with tears and frailty. Her head falls heavy in her hands. There's a figure standing before her. She peers up through the slits of her fingers.

Marissa is standing there. There's a somber line for her lips as she gazes sympathetically down to Santana. She let's her hand float forward, lending it out to help the girl. Santana can only stare it and see the hand that helped her the first day they met. A dull yellow light rims the slender fingers. Santana looks back up to the girl's emerald eyes, seeing the commitment pooling deep within them. Everything's a mess right now and nothing seems right. Hoping for the best, Santana reaches a lone hand up at grips the girl's in a soft hold. A hold Brittany has the their friendship bracelet back at the park. A hold that means dedication and endeavor. Something Brittany is ready to take if she ever sees Santana again.

__I'm not perfect, but I keep trying__

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><p><strong>DO NOT STOP. To be honest, I've grown tired of Marissa too. I had her for conflict but now I'm like UGH. Haha but we all need that one bitch to ruin everything right? Anyway I promise the best. Don't give up. Shout out to my FAVORITE reviewers: littlemusical (duh, love you boo),CloudGazer15, Kaede Shinomori, and dancelikeheya. You guys mean everything! Expect less angst in the future. I think I've done enough already. <strong>__  
><em>_


	19. Breakdown And After

**Ew, so short chapter here. I wanted to make one last update before school starts in two days and actually this little thing here is more important than it seems. Well, it already does seem pretty important but you get it. Anyway, yeah there will be A LOT of angst in the future but I think you guys will like it and hate it. I don't know. This is angst anyway sooo. Read review and enjoy! God, you guys keep me young. I love bringing this story back though. It will sadly be wrapped up within a few more chapters but we still have a little ways to go. Thank you for keeping up strong!  
><strong>

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><p><em><strong>Just Another Star <strong>__by __**Bullet For My Valentine**_

_Santana burst through the doors of her room, rage and fury pulsating through her eyes and veins. This room, it's so cruel. All these memories hanging up on the wall; all these sick, twisted lies. She should have suspected Brittany to leave her eventually. The blonde is no different from any other except in her dumb ways._

_ Santana storms over to her dresser with stomps of betrayal burning through the wood. She lashes her arms out, shoving every picture frame of her and Brittany straight into the wall. The glass shatters and sprinkles to the ground with the sound of little bells. Marissa watches weakly at the door, fearing to approach the lethal girl another step. Santana is well aware of her presence and wants her to witness this breakdown; she enjoys being feared._

This is what I can see through my eyes  
>This is the color of your sunrise<br>This is what I can see through your eyes

_"SO MUCH FOR A PROMISE!" Santana bellows, stomping down upon the images as she twists her foot to distort the once endearing moment._

_ She stops and turns to her closet. Throwing the doors open, she grins wickedly down at a little box. Picking it up, her grip begins to shake with it's tight hold. She sets it down on the bed and rips it to shreds. There, before her, lays all the masks she has made over time. One for every sickening emotion displayed._

_ Starting with Brittany's favorite, she pulls the happy mask to her face. She turns to Marissa with the scary mask peering it's eery grin at her. The ginger cringes as Santana skips happily up to her. She stops in front of the girl and playfully cocks her head to the side. Marissa's face scrunches with fear as she watches the girl nearly go off the brink of insanity._

_ "Isn't this fun?" Santana coos, voice as soft as an angel's._

_ Marissa can only whimper with the shake of her head in response. Santana's head snaps up straight and she lunges out to grip the girl's arm._

_ "I SAID. ISN'T THIS FUN?" She roars, threatening the weak girl._

_ "No," Marissa cries before Santana throws her onto the bed, her back colliding into the other masks._

_ "Well, Britts and I used to think so," she murmurs, walking suggestively over to Marissa with a gentle sway of her hips._

_ Her steps stop before the bed. She pulls the mask off her face slowly and gazes down at it. It's mocking her, she can see past it's chipping paint. Those oranges and yellows swirling on the surface, such happy colors. How sad. She whips out her hand and let's the cheap plaster crash against her wall. _

Jump, jump, jump, jump  
>Can you see the light behind these eyes?<br>Jump, jump, jump, jump  
>Can you see the light behind these eyes, eyes?<p>

_"Pass me another."_

_ It's not an option, it's an order. Marissa weakly scrambles on the bed and lifts up a blue one. She tosses it to Santana without another thought and crawls back to the end of the bed where she believe it to be safe. Nothing is safe right now._

_ Santana catches it without a problem. She observes it for a second. This was Brittany's least favorite mask. The sad one. How pleasant. She throws it shamelessly to the wall anyway, not bearing another second to look at the memories. All these masks she made with Brittany. She hates them all. _

You've betrayed me for the last time_  
><em>

_ The next mask to be abolished was the Angry one. It's a crimson red with a scarring frown. Santana loves this mask because it resembles monsters and Satan. Brittany was actually afraid of this mask. She cried the only time Santana brought it out. Santana can remember holding her all night until the blonde got the image out of her head. She kept telling Santana she wasn't a scary monster like that and, for a moment, Santana believed it. She was young and niave though. She would believe anything Brittany told her sometimes; only the possible emotional stuff and not the ridiculous statements about ducks and the color blue._

_ "I fucking love this mask!" Santana laughs hysterically before throwing it to the wall with a loud crash. "Oh whoops..."_

You betrayed me for the last time  
>Through the light, I see the truth shine<br>This is how I can see through your eyes

_Mask after mask, they all broke upon each other in a feeble pile of scraps. Sad, happy, angry, all of them. The last remaining was envy, Santana's latest one. She made that when Brittany and Artie were going out. It was finely sculpted and painted to perfection with a deep shade of purple and specks of navy. She was too busy admiring her work to notice Puck, Rachel, and Quinn at the door. Marissa had called them for help. Santana was slowly loosing it. _

Jump, jump, jump, jump  
>Can you see the light behind these eyes?<br>Jump, jump, jump, jump

Can you see the light behind these eyes, eyes?  
>You've betrayed me for the last time<p>

_ "I hated Artie- so much," Santana whimpers out, shaking her head gradually. "He couldn't even walk..."_

_ "Santana, you have to stop this," Quinn bravely says in a soft voice, carefully walking towards the broken Latina. "We're here for you. We will always be."_

_ Santana smashes the Envy mask to the floor below her. She spins around to face Quinn with a scolding glare._

_ "I don't want you- I WANT BRITTANY," she insists, jamming her index finger into the skin on her chest where her heart is located. "AND SHE LEFT ME!"_

You're just another star that's burnt out to quickly  
>But I still see you, shining<br>I'm just another guy that's fucked up immensely  
>But you still love me, why? I don't know<p>

_Quinn takes a step and encases Santana into a tight embrace. The Latina doesn't fight. In fact, she breaks down at her knees and let's her body sink into Quinn's. Puck walks over and soothes out her hair as he gazes somberly to the floor. Rachel scurries over to clean up the mess Santana has made._

_ "I love her," the Latina whimpers into her friend's silk skin. "I still do. I hate it. I hate loving her. I can't stop. She promised-"_

_ "Shh, we know. We know," Quinn coos, nuzzling her nose into Santana's hair. "It's going to be __okay. Just rest..."_

_ Santana tenses up.  
>"NO!" She screams, hands flying to her hair. "No! She follows me in my dreams. Her voice, her face. She won't leave me the fuck alone!"<em>

This is what I see through my eyes  
>Black is the color of your sunrise<br>This is what I can see through my eyes  
>This is the color of your sunshine<p>

_ "I'm not going back. I'm never going back," Santana cries, shaking her head violently. "I'll find work. I'm never going back. Mami left me. She's not-home right now. O-only because she wants me to p-pack alone..."_

_ Quinn listens to Santana's words and can't believe it. She found out; her mother found out._

_ "She w-won't look at me. She says she had never seen a m-monster so ugly," Santana continues, shaking to no end. "No body loves me."_

_ Quinn shakes her head and brings Santana closer if it's even physically impossible._

_ "I love you. We love you," she assures her meaningfully. "You will always have us and that's an unbreakable promise."_

You're just another star that's burnt out to quickly  
>But I still see you, shining<p>

_Everyone left soon after, leaving Santana alone to pack. The girl walked over to the ground she broke everything at. There's nothing there because Rachel cleaned it all. She's a good kid, Santana doesn't give her enough credit. It also takes no genius to guess she and Quinn are sleeping together. Good for her, Quinn is a loyal girl at times. They both are good for each other._

_ A corner of something blue catches her eyes. She goes to her knees and looks under the bed. There's the sad mask. It's cracked in two but it's still sitting there before her. She reaches out and picks it up. Toying around with it, she analyzes the damage and sees it isn't too bad at all. She get's out tape from her dresser and begins fixing it diligently. Soon after, the mask lays before her with a large crack marring down the middle. She brings it to her face and it still works fine. That's what she is left with now. No bracelet, no pictures, nothing but the Sad mask._

I'm just another guy that's fucked up immensely  
>But you still love me, why? I don't know<p>

One year later and Brittany still hasn't shown up. No one hears from her; no one looks for her. Santana lays in bed next to Marissa and Quinn. Rachel is out singing on Broadway. The brunette actually proved her talent to the world and made it big. She lives with the three of them now and mostly provides for everything. New York isn't so bad and ever since gay marriage rights, all the girls have been living big with hope for one another. Especially Quinn and Rachel, Santana is _dying _in anticipation for it. Quinn knows she won't be the one to propose but when Rachel is ready, if she ever will be, she will get down on one knee. It was Brittany's lose anyway, too. Quinn has no job and Santana works at a little shoe store with Marissa. It's nice that they all live together. Puck actually visits at times with Beth and Rachel's mom. They have nice get-togethers and so far- everything seems a lot better. The only thing missing is the beautiful blonde dancer.

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><p><strong>So sadly that's it for this chapter and yes, it is a flash back. Then I explain life after Brittany. It ain't over yet kids. Wow, for my first fic this is pretty long. I'm kinda proud right now.<br>**


	20. Making The Change

**Wow so uhm, fast update haha. I', just scared my school work is going to get in the way of this so I'm writing out everything like as fast as I can. Don't worry this doesn't change a thing. I still have my plans laid out for this story and what not. I won't stop until it's done! Read, review, and enjoy! Sorry for any mistakes! Kill me school starts tomorrow morning!**

_I own nothing!_

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><p>It's been a month living in New York with the girls now. Marissa has enjoyed every last moment of it. All the friendships and smiles everyone has loved never end. It's a shame she's dying. Everyone knows it too. They can't help her though, she refuses anything and especially rehab. She isn't quite sure herself hwy she doesn't want to be saved. It's not like she had much before anyway. Santana had something, though. Santana had something amazing and a cruel accident destroyed it all for her. Marissa wanted to be her guardian angel; she truly did. But her and everyone else know who Santana's only angel is.<p>

"Quinn."

The blonde looks up to meet Marissa's eyes. She cooks absently, already so skilled at it over the year they lived here. The ginger has a radiant smile on her pale, dying face and Quinn hasn't the slightest clue why.

"Yes?" She asks, carefully watching Marissa to see if she had been taking her drugs again.

There is no red in her eyes and she stands stable. This is odd. She has all her consciousness and everything. Marissa leans in slowly, glancing around the room to see if the coast was clear. Quinn gauges the girl's movements and is almost scared. Marissa finally smiles at her again. She let's out a happy sigh before shaking her head.

"I _found _her," she whispers, her smile nearly splitting her face.

Marissa had to be high. Quinn couldn't make any sense of what the girl was trying to get across. Why wasn't she sharing this with Santana? Is she cheating on her? What's going on? She cautiously leans in.

"_Who?" _She asks under her breath, eying the girl.

Marissa drums her fingers on the counter for a second before twirling on her toes.

"Brittany!"

Quinn's hand drops the wooden spoon in the pasta before her skin comes in contact with the scorching metal. She hisses and grabs her wrist before turning back to Marissa. Surly this had to be another Brittany. Brittany... It's been forever since she heard that name.

"WHAT?" She can't even keep her voice low. "Marissa- what are you talking about?"

"Brittany! The blonde! You know, Santana's soulmate..." She trails off, gesturing towards Quinn with her hands as if this is common sense. "Brittany!"

Quinn is well aware that the girl is nearly dying but she begins to wonder if her brain is withering too. She shakes her head and sets the wooden spoon on the counter. Turning to fully face the ginger, she gently reaches out to hold her hands in her own.

"Marissa, honey, you don't know what you're talking about," she insists apologetically. "It's okay just be quiet..."

Marissa tugs her hands away from Quinn and scolds at her. Quinn is the one that doesn't know what she is talking about.

"NO!" She growls, taking a step back. "I- I'm going to bring her back! You'll see! If it's the last thing I do-"

"Sweetie just please calm down and take a breath," Quinn stops the girl, holding her hands up in defeat. "Brittany is gone and since when did you care?"

The words struck Marissa. Since when did she care? Averting her eyes down to the scars on her arms, she held in a whimper. That's when she started caring. The moment she saw how happy Brittany made Santana back at school, before she dropped out. She started caring since she saved the Latina. Marissa can hardly sleep with Santana at times. She feels like an intruder, as if the girl belongs to that missing blonde- and she does.

"I've always cared," she breathes, hair falling before her eyes. "Don't tell her. I'm going to be out for a few days. Don't look for me. I'm not coming back without her."

Quinn tries to grab the girl but she's already off. She locked herself in her room and already began to feverishly pack her items. Quinn ran over and began slamming down on the door, trying to open it though her attempts were useless. She had to try something at least to say she did.

"Marissa! Stop this! Santana will kill you!" She warns the girl, yelling over the barrier between them. "You're being stupid!"

Marissa only smiles as she packs her stuff. Her hearts racing and adrenaline is pulsing through her in heavy doses. She has waited forever for this day, to truly make the difference of a life time. To reunite love. That's all she has ever wanted. Change a life.

"DON'T WAIT UP!" She laughs out loud enough for Quinn to hear before she snaps her luggage shut.

The only exit now is the window and she doesn't mind. Her body is already so thin to the point her bones are about completely visible. Yes, it's a repugnant sight to see but she has no other option. She doesn't want the help, she doesn't need it. She can do whatever she wants how she wants it done.

Before she goes for the window, she is sure to pick up the ruffled piece of paper with the information on it. She grins and shoves it in her jean pocket before turning to the window and opening it with her weak arms in one hard full-body thrust. Her hair flashes behind her as she soaks in the fresh New York air. She felt like a freed caged bird. A whole world of opportunity is displayed before her. A whole world full of different colors and diverse ideas. It seems so beautiful sometimes.

* * *

><p>Santana walks in from work, trailing her worn feet behind her in trudges. She looks up and weakly and gives a small smile as she opens the apartment door. Nearly collapsing on the couch, she slams the door shut and indulges in the large space of the living roomkitchen. Something seems off for some reason.

"Quinn? Marissa?" She calls out, suddenly sitting up and snapping out of her sleepy daze.

The two girls would usually be doing their yoga now. Both are unseen. Where could they be? Santana doesn't like to be toyed with. Out of no where, her head began to hurt. Another migraine. She hisses out in pain and tugs at her hair as she curls into the soft cushions of the couch. Her sight already began to blur into something new.

_Santana walks around a poorly constructed Pathmark, strolling under the cheap, flickering lights above as she makes her way down the freezer isle. She's mad because Brittany and her got in a fight over practice that day, caused by Sue of course. Her mother was off somewhere else in the store, buying groceries or something. Santana didn't really care. Only the thought of the blonde dancer pooled in her mind._

_ She makes it at the edge of the isle and leans out. Her eyes went wide as she sees Brittany standing at the check out with her father. The blonde is nudging her dad as she begs for some bubble gum. She get's it, of course. Santana wishes her father was still with her. She's twelve now and he still hasn't shown up. _

_ "SANTANA!"_

_ The Latina cringes when she hears her mother calling out for her. Shit. She glances over to Brittany and sees the girl notices her. They actually make eye contact for a moment. Before she can think about her choices, Santana darts off back towards the beginning of the isle. Why was Brittany even there at the middle of the night with her dad? They were day people. Santana was a night person._

_"Fuck!" The girl hisses under her breath, sprinting up the isle to somewhere safe._

_ She takes a sharp turn and trips on her ripped sneakers. Biting down on her tongue, she tries to get up. Then two perfect white shoes are in front of her eyes. She doesn't have to guess to know it's Brittany. Two hands are already gripping her arms gently and helping her to her feet._

_ "Are you okay, San?" Brittany murmurs, soothing out the Latina's hair. _

_ Santana grunts and shys away from Brittany's touch. She is still mad at the blonde and refuses to admit she actually misses her terribly. Brittany lets her hands fall and her head hang._

_ "I'm fine," Santana spits, secretly embarrassed she had to fall in front of Brittany. _

_ Brittany plays with her wrists, tugging at the jingling bracelet. Santana hears the jingle and __looks down at her own friendship bracelet. Suddenly, she can't help but feel bad. The blonde has such a power over her it should be illegal. She's almost at the point where she would kill for the blonde._

_ "I- uhmm, San?" Brittany whispers weakly, looking up at Santana from under her lashes. _

_ She looks so innocent Santana curses at herself. Why does Brittany have to do this all the time?_

_ "What," she asks, harsher than intended._

_ Brittany mashes her lips together and accept the tone Santana gave her. She takes a moment._

_ "I really miss you and I'm super sorry for everything at practice and you're really pretty and-"_

_ "Brittany, stop."_

_ The blonde looks up at Santana more fully. Santana sees the tears rimming Brittany's eyes and feels bad. She almost forgot how sensitive the blonde is about everything. How could such a pretty face look so sad?_

_ "Okay," Brittany whimpers, a tear streaming down her cheek. _

_ Santana sighs._

_ "Look, it's fine, okay? Just- don't cry," she growls, shaking her head. "I hate when you cry, Britt. We're still friends. We always will be."_

_ Brittany head shoots up with radiant beams. Her smile gleams as Santana gives the girl an odd look. She looks like an excited little puppy. There's a sparkle in her blue eyes._

_ "Really?" She asks, a pitch over a squeal._

_ Santana gives a little grin. She actually loves when the blonde gets like this. Brittany gets her in a tight hug before she give a though to object. She wouldn't anyway, she love Brittany's hugs; they're the best part of her day._

_ "Yeah, really."_

Santana snaps back to reality with a harsh whiplash. Her head spins as she grips her hair. God, she fucking hates when this happens. Flashbacks always hit her and she doesn't even know why. Brittany always said that soulmates always see each other even when they're apart. She wonders is the blonde was actually right all those times. No, she told herself it is forbidden to ever mention the blonde. Even in her mind she tries to banish her but she always seems to fins her way back in.

Getting up from the couch, she slumps onto a stool at the kitchen counter and spins around once. She notices paper tacked to the fridge and eyes it. Walking over to the fridge, she tugs off the paper and reads it

Santana,

DO NOT BE MAD. Marissa has gone insane and I'm off looking for her. Her doors locked at it would be lovely if you could fix that when we get home. If I don't make it home later tonight I will tomorrow. I'm fairly sure where she has gone anyway. Tell Rachel I said she is beautiful and I love her! Have a good night! I'll call in the morning!

Love, Quinn

Santana grunts and crumples up the paper. She tosses it into the trash, only to have it bounce off the rim and hit the floor. Sighing, she walks over to pick it up and place it in the trash again. She is really off her game. Marissa is beginning to bore her with all those drug problems. Why won't the girl just let her help her? It's pissing her off.

She doesn't really care right now. She is simply worn out from work and makes her way into her room. Already falling onto the bed, she takes in a deep inhale and smiles as sleep washes over her. The last thing she thought of is that if Quinn was missing something in the letter. She can just await the call in the morning.

* * *

><p>Marissa violently dials in a phone booth outside. She has the doors shut and just prays Quinn doesn't find her until she is done with her call. Her foot taps impatiently against the glass door as she listens to the beeps of the phone.<p>

_"Hello?"_

"Brittany!" She smiles, glancing around for any sight of Quinn. "It's me again."

_"Oh hey Marissa! How was your day?"_

"It was whatever. Listen, we still got a plan, right?"

_"Yup. I'll be on the plane tomorrow morning."_

"Great! I'll meet you at the airport tomorrow night, then."

There's a little pause. Marissa isn't sure if Brittany is thinking of something to say or hesitating to say something.

_"Do you think she- she still likes me?"_

Marissa chuckles and shakes her head.

"She loves you, Brittany. Just give it a little time. I'm sure everything will work out...

Quinn is storming towards the booth now. Marissa coughs and panics.

"Shit! Uh, Britt, Qiunn found me. Don't worry though, I won't be giving up on this plan. I'll see you tomorrow night."

Marissa quickly hangs up the phone and steps out of the booth, whistling innocently. Now she has to persuade Quinn to come along with her. She figures it won;t be that hard because everyone knows that Quinn and Rachel both miss Brittany. And deep, deep down inside, Santana hasn't ever let her go.

* * *

><p><strong>Soooo Marissa ain't that bad after all. I just needed someone for Santana when Brittany left and actually I think she's chill. Her character is actually important so whatever. I don't really have the heart to kill her but we'll see. It's simply out there. Aw sweet Faberry. Tell me what you think!<strong>


	21. Returning

**Started school. It ain't so bad. Whatever. I guess I'll be updating every weekend. Yup. Soooo, read review and enjoy. Yup.**** Sorry for any mistakes.**

_I own nothing!_

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><p><em>Ringing at an ear-splitting volume, the fire alarm blared off in the school. Santana rolled her eyes, thoroughly annoyed at the sound before she stood up to file out of the room with the rest of the useless students. Brittany was already at her side before she could step outside the doors. They automatically linked pinkies as they always did. <em>

_ Outside, the sky was a misty grey covered with looming clouds. What a day for a fire drill. Santana clung to her arms, shivering with the chilling breeze. This was not how she planned to start Elementary school. The sun was just out a moment ago. Brittany looked over at her, deep blue eyes filled with concern._

_ "Are you cold?" She asks as they walk onto the grass into an ordered line. _

_ Santana scolds at the grass, not wanting to admit she is cold to Brittany. She got like that sometimes, wanting the blonde to think she's Superwoman or something amazing. The weather said otherwise._

_ "Yeah," she muttered in return, giving into the fact."No big deal."_

_ Instantly, Brittany unzipped her over-sized hoodie. Santana watched her with an odd look, wondering what the girl was up to now. Brittany opened the cozy hoodie completely, gesturing for Santana to come closer. The Latina looked at her for a moment, seeking out hesitation. There was nothing to be found. At the time, none of the students even knew you could be homosexual; they simply thought you could be really close friends._

_ Not being capable of handling this cold weather any longer, Santana scooted into Brittany. She rested her head on the blonde's chest as Brittany wrapped them up together in her hoodie. Their proximity was unbelievable and Santana could feel her face heat up. She didn't know why and simply didn't question the funny feeling in her stomach at the time. She just stuck with the idea her and Brittany are best friends and that's what best friends do._

_ "Still cold?" Brittany murmurs, ducking her head towards Santana's ear._

_ A tingle ran up Santana's body as she lightly shakes her head against the blonde's flawless skin. Nothing could make her cold when she's against Brittany. The world is warm and loving when they're molded together._

* * *

><p>Santana wakes up to a pestering headache. She has grown so tired of all these dreams and memories, completely exhausted at this point. Truly, she has gotten over Brittany. She had to eventually, looking at the cruel reality of it all, they would never be together. Not because they're both girl but because they have known each other for their whole life now. Relationships like that don't last; they never once had and they never will. Santana is used to accepting the horrible truths about life and has no problem with this one. Especially not since Brittany threw her out to the dogs when she left in the manner she had.<p>

Glancing at the time, she almost falls over. It's nearly three o'clock. Where had the day gone? Not that she minded, today was her day off anyway. No better way to spend it than to sleep.

Remembering Quinn was supposed to call her, she gets up from her bed and grabs her cell phone from the dresser. Eleven missed calls. Santana's eyes go wide as she begins to wonder if she read that number right. Yup, eleven missed calls exactly. Dialing Quin's number, she taps her foot impatiently. There has to be something serious if Quinn would call her that many times in a day.

_"Santana?"_

"Quinn?" The Latina asks, a little worried over the distressed tone in the blonde's voice.

_"You have to get here. I'm at the shoe store with Marissa," _Quinn says before hesitating. _"There is someone here to- see you."_

Santana pauses a moment.

"Well, who?" She inquires.

_"You have to come. It doesn't matter, it's just really important," _Quinn blurts out.

"Fine. Don't get your panties in a knot, Fabray. I thought the shoe store was closed today?"

Quinn already hung up before Santana could get an answer. Santana didn't appreciate it but then again she didn't really care. Just waking up from a nice snooze has got her mind all boggled so she goes with the flow as well she can. She swaps her keys from the kitchen counter and heads out the door with her hair a mess. It's an off day, she doesn't give.

Swinging her weight into the car, Santana let's out a sigh and shoves the keys in the ignition. The car roars to life and she is already half way to the shoe store. By now, the drive there is routine for her. The traffic is horrendous though. Why did she drive again? Was this not New York City? Drumming her hands against the wheel, she licks her lips and prays for time to speed up. Surprises aren't her thing and neither is patience. What if it's a job offer?

Now nearly there, Santana relaxes her death grip on the wheel and slunches back as she steers. Her calm mood remained as she heard church bells faintly ringing. They echo that cryptic chime as it swims through her ears. She hates when they ring, it reminds her of _that night. _That was nearly a year ago now.

Santana glances at her wrist against the leather wheel. For some reason she had been expecting to see a bracelet there. Why would she though? She hadn't felt that way in what seems like forever. Shaking her head, she comes to her senses and parks outside the store.

* * *

><p>Quinn and Marissa had been in the store all morning. They picked up Brittany at four o'clock and decided this would be a good place to get Santana locked in. The only problem now is there is almost no way Brittany can woo Santana at this point.<p>

"Okay, how do you expect to do this?" Quinn finally asks Brittany, suddenly unsure of everything.

Brittany looks up at Quinn with confidence shining in her blue eyes.

"I had all this work done on me. I know- I know there's hope for me to walk again," Brittany states with a shaking voice. "The doctor said this was all he could do and now I would just have to wait. And check this out!"

Brittany takes a deep inhale before closing her eyes. She bites her teeth down together as if she's trying to lift a heavy weight. Quinn and Marissa don't have a clue what's going on until they see Brittany's leg shake slightly. Quinn's jaw all but dropped.

"BRITTANY! OH MY GOD!" She cries out in a joy, jumping in place like a little toddler soaring with excitement. "THIS IS AMAZING!"

Marissa watches in complete awe before clapping her hands and nodding her head with an amazed expression.

"Wow, I mean," she tries but can't find the words. "That's so awesome. I think you're really getting somewhere, Brittany. Honestly."

Brittany's smiles brightly and nods her head. She really has come so far. At first she thought it was all for dancing- and it mostly was. But what she really wants is to dance with Santana, walk on the beach with her, give her piggyback rides, and just so much more.

"Yeah," Brittany whispers. "I really hope Santana doesn't hate me..."

Brittany knows well what Santana felt the day she left. She knows when you leave Santana there is no going back. Her walls build up and never fall. That's why Brittany is going out on a whim now. It's happened so many times to the poor girl, only Brittany has ever been the one to stay with her through thick and thin. Nothing could take her away from Santana. Or so she thought.

Quinn and Marissa couldn't find a response to Brittany's whimpers. They don't know how Santana will react to seeing the girl again, but they did know how she reacted to her leaving. They can only hope for the best.

Marissa began to break out with hoarse coughs as she covered her mouth with her sleeves. Quinn watches carefully, Brittany the same. The girl is clearly in horrible condition. She looks worse than she's ever been. Maybe she will get some help after everything ends up okay.

"You alright?" Quinn asks, cringing a little.

Marissa coughs a little more before nodding her head in assurance. She offers a weak smile.

"Yeah, I'm good. I'm fine. A little dizzy, that's all."

Suddenly, they hear the front door bells chime, indicating someone has entered the store. Indicating Santana has entered the store.

* * *

><p>Santana pulls the door open, letting it close behind her as she walks in. It's rather dark with only a few dim lights emitting their somber yellow rays. They seem more like old street lights than lights in a store. Santana notes she needs to get new bulbs.<p>

"Quinn?" She calls out, peering around. "Did you find Marissa?"

There's no answer. She simply thinks Quinn is looking through the shoes in the back again. Walking to the back door, she pulls out her keys and unlocks it. The back room is just a wide open space with all shoes on the walls. It's nice to chill back there when days are excessively slow.

Santana opens the door, feeling a slight chill run down her spine.

"Quinn?" She calls out in the dimly lit room, before turning to look to the side.

Her heart stops. Her dark eyes go wide. Her roesy red lips slightly part. She can hardly feel her legs, they're trembling terribly. She can hear her heart pulse in her ear. The blood running through her veins feels like it's all stopped at once. Her mouth begins to dry.

There, directly across from her, sits Brittany in her wheelchair. Her watery blue eyes are gazing into Santana's. Santana can hardly believe it. Those blue eyes she sang Songbird to. Those blue eyes she pushed away when they chose Artie over her. Those blue eyes she gazed into as they were being pulled from her into an ambulance that winter's night. Those blue eyes she got lost in when she woke up in a hospital bed to her beautiful presence in this world. Those blue eyes that lit up when they snuck out to the arcade and played the games as if they were mind-washed. Those blue eyes she would anxiously wait to see again when Brittany goes out on vacations.

Those fucking blue eyes that gave her a partner when everyone else was repulsed by her.

Those fucking blue eyes that displayed fireworks in them as they gazed up at the sky, high in the air on a ferris wheel.

Those fucking blue eyes that Santana fled from when they left her broken and scattered.

* * *

><p>"S- Santana," Brittany began, choking out her words as she let her tears stream freely down her cheeks. "You look- beautiful..."<p>

Santana couldn't speak a word; her whole vocabulary drained from her brain. She thought maybe she was in a dream at first. Maybe she just drank a little too much. Or maybe she is simply going insane.

Brittany attempted to wheel towards her but Santana backed up against the wall as remotely far as she could. She nearly stumbled upon her own feet in the process but she did it with success. The only thing on her mind was getting away from Brittany. Far, far away from Brittany. The girl's sudden appearance slapped her like a brick wall and she isn't enjoying one moment of it. She isn't going to be weak. Santana Lopez is a fierce bitch and independent girl.

"You left me," she lowly growls, trying not to let her uncontrollable side take over.

Brittany's eyes are pleading now but Santana doesn't buy it.

"I-"

"SAVE IT, Brittany," Santana spits, cutting off the helpless girl. "There's nothing to talk about. I am leaving. Good fucking bye."

Santana reaches for the door knob. It won't move. She tries to open it again. It still won't move. She grows enraged, tugging and hitting it with her fist.

"What the fuck? OPEN THE DOOR!"

Her sight is beginning to spin as her mind swims. She could hear Brittany moving towards her but she tries not to acknowledge it. Then it becomes too much. She can smell Brittany's citrus aroma. She can practically _taste _it now. This is all too much for her to take. Brittany was the world to her. She was her safe haven, her sunshine, her lover. No one has ever been closer than her and Brittany. This was all happening too fast.

Then Santana feels a soft, gentle hand on hers.

Everything goes black.


	22. Still Hope

**Urgh, so this one is a little late my bad. But on the bright side OHMIGOD GLEE TOMORROW! I'm gonna die! Whooooo! Uhm so yeah, read review and enjoy!**

_I own nothing!_

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><p>Brittany holds Santana's unconscious body in her arms. The body heat, their perfect fit, and everything just feels so right and familiar, as if Brittany is returning home once again. It nearly kills her when she realizes this girl had fainted into her arms; she had not gave in nor ducked for an embrace. Santana was actually trying to flee from her a moment ago. There was a desperate glint in her dark eyes, Brittany could see it. She couldn't quite tell what they read; she saw betrayal, a cold fear,insecurity, dislike, but most of all she saw <em>relief. <em>

That's what her eyes saw, though. Her heart saw her little, weak best friend anxiously waiting for her to return from vacation or dance classes. She saw toddler Santana sitting on the edge of the sidewalk with the string from a balloon floating high above gripped tightly in her feeble grasp. When Brittany started to wheel over to Santana before, her heart saw little Santana running towards her in desperate strides. When she reached out for her and had her fall into her arms, her heart saw Santana toppling over her with her whole body wrapped around her in a warm cuddle as she chanted "I missed you, I missed you so much" into her ear.

Now Brittany gazes down at the beautiful Latina and wonders what has happened. She needs to know if Santana has lost interest in her. Running her fingers through thick strands of Santana's charcoal-colored hair, she closes her eyes. Nothing in the universe could compare to Santana. She is everything Brittany would ever want in a lover. They've made it this far. There's no way Brittany is turning back now. If she did, she knew for a fact there would be no chance. But right now, gazing down at the most beautiful girl in the whole world unconscious in her arms, she knows there has to be at least the smallest chance.

"Santana? Brittany?" Quinn calls from the other side of the door cautiously. "Are you guys okay?"

At first Brittany doesn't take notice to Quinn's voice because she's too lost in Santana's peaceful face. She looks in a sweet slumber upon Brittany's bosom. Reality comes back and Brittany's head shoots up to stare at the shut door.

"Um. Quinn?" Brittany starts, not sure of how to explain the situation. "Santana sorta- uh- fainted on me. Should we take her home?"

The next sound heard was the door unlocking and swinging open. Quinn's jaw drops as she stares at the two girls with disbelief, Marissa chuckling behind her as she shakes her head. Quinn brings her hand to her mouth. Her eyes can't be lying to her; it's just so hard to believe that someone managed to make Santana faint. She didn't know how or why the Latina had blacked out but she sure knew Brittany must have done some damage leaving and returning.

"Wow, Britt," Quinn slowly nods her head as she takes in the sight. "You really. Yeah. Just, okay. Not bad."

Brittany offers some sort of smile. She has to admit it is beyond lovely to have Santana in her arms again, unconscious or not. The feeling has been longed for for a while now. Suddenly, frequent knocks rap upon the back door.

"WHAT'S GOING ON?" Puck's voice called out faintly.

Quinn let out a breath.

"Forgot I had him guard the back door we got out from," she apologizes, walking over to the door. "You can come in Puck. Santana passed out."

There was a short silence. Quinn began to wonder if _he_ passed out.

"NO FUCKING WAY! OH MY GOD! I'M TAKING PICTURES!"

Quinn rolls her eyes. Marissa nods her head, silently agreeing with Puck's reaction. Brittany simply continued to gaze down at Santana with bliss swirling in her blue eyes. Puck threw the door open and stormed in. This was the reason Quinn really wanted them to talk and not this.

"Damn, bravo, Brittany! This is just too good," he snickered, drawing out his phone to snap multiple photos of Brittany glaring up at him with Santana in her arms. "Geez, don't smile too hard, Britt."

"Puck, go away. I just want to get her in bed," Brittany murmurs, brushing Santana's cheek with the back of her hand.

Puck and Marissa exchanged looks. They both held in their inappropriate laughter. Brittany noticed.

"Not like that," she snapped, shaking her head at them. "Okay, Quinn! Can we go before they ruin the moment more?"

Quinn instantly nodded and walked over to them. She grabbed Brittany's handles and began to wheel them out. Luckily Santana drove here so she has a car to put them in. Puck turned to Marissa before they burst out with laughter.

"How long do you think it will take?" He asked.

Marissa glanced at the ceiling, thinking for a moment.

"You know, I honestly don't know. I mean, Santana is a tough bitch. She has really become independent since Brittany left. But, like, seeing what they had before was- it was something special," she explains, putting deep thought to it. "It may actually take some time. I believe in Santana though and that she will let Brittany back into her life. I'm giving a good month or two."

Puck nodded his head.

"I say a week."

They both laughed together. Puck lightly punched Marissa's arm in a joking manner. Her body is too weak though, it left a harsh bruise. She rubbed her shoulders and attempted not to show the pain.

"Whoa. Did I hit you that hard?" He asked, concerned.

Marissa shook her head violently and shut her eyes. She bit on her tongue before speaking.

"No, no it's fine. Haha, it's the soda. Really get's to your bones," she lied incredibly bad.

Puck gave her a look before shrugging it off. A year later and he still doesn't give about anything. Some things don't change.

* * *

><p>Quinn laid Santana down on her bed, careful not to wake the girl. Brittany watched quietly with solemn eyes, wishing she could be the one to lay Santana down. She's loathes her condition and curses her wheelchair. Quinn looked up and caught Brittany's eyes in a sympathetic gaze.<p>

"Remember, when she wakes up I'm right down the hall," she offers a small smile, getting up to her feet.

Brittany nods her head in response. She enjoys their apartment, it's really cozy. Quinn sighs, clasping her hands together before walking out the door and gently shutting it behind her. Brittany can't seem to pull her eyes away from Santana. They were apart for far too long and it nearly killed her. If only she could just find the power to move her legs again.

Taking a deep inhale, Brittany loosens her muscles and readies her body. She focuses all her strength into her legs as she tries to lift them. They shake but it's useless. She hates the feeling; the partially-numb stinging sensation shooting up her body. Giving up, she let's out a heavy breath and allows her legs to go limp again. The least she can think on the positive side is that she has made progress.

Rolling over to the window, Brittany leans up and places her elbows on the windowsill. She lays her head on her arms and gazes out the window up at the night sky. All the surrounding buildings have their lights lit, almost like a thousand stars plastered in the sky. She can't tell if there are any stars in the sky tonight, all she sees are the skyscrapers and cars driving by below.

Santana lays still on her side, stiff with uncertainty. She had witnessed Brittany attempt to move her legs before and was thoroughly shocked by it all. Her legs were actually shaking! They may have not been moving properly, but they were sure getting there. That's besides the point, though. Brittany left her in the dust, she betrayed her.

"Brittany," Santana breathed, a defeated tone in her voice.

The blonde's head snapped up. Her blue eyes went wide as she quickly swerved around to face her. Santana was moving to sit on the side of her bed, feet flat on the floor. Her hands gripped the sheets crumpling in her palm. She's visibly struggling to say what she wants. Her knuckles began to turn white.

"What are you doing here?" She finally asked, head bowed enough for her hair to hide her face.

Brittany gave the girl a moment. She knows Santana knew why she was here but she let her breathe. Wanting to wheel over to comfort her, Brittany decides it's best to stay put.

"You know why," she lowly replies, playing with her hands in her lap.

Santana closes her eyes and breathes steadily. She shakes her head, catching Brittany's attention.

"I actually don't," she begins, faintly speaking. "If you're here for me then it's pointless. You of all people should know where our relationship stands now."

Brittany reaches a shaking hand into her pocket and draws out a silver bracelet. Santana doesn't need to look up to know it's her friendship bracelet; she could already tell by the faint glint it sparked. Brittany's lips quiver as she weakly holds out her open palm as to offer the wristlet to Santana. The Latina refused to even look up at her.

"I- I..."

Brittany couldn't finish her thought or sentence. Santana had lashed out her hand, slapping the bracelet out of Brittany's palm. The object clang against the wall and jingled to the floor. Tears began to pool in Brittany's glossy blue eyes as she slowly brought her hand back against her chest.

"When you left I freaked out," Santana explains, standing up from her bed and walking over to her dresser. "I really did. And I got left with this..."

She pulled something off the top of her dresser and brought it to her face. Turning around, Brittany gasped. Santana was holding her sad blue mask in her hands, covering over her face. It looks frail, as if it broke and was poorly repaired with dried glue around the large crack down the middle.

Brittany hadn't seen that mask in the longest time. She can't even recall the last time she saw it. It amazed her Santana still had it. The Latina stood there and let Brittany see how she really felt underneath her tough exterior; just like she had so many timed before.

Suddenly, half of the mask fell to the floor and scattered everywhere. The dried glue didn't hold up long enough. Santana stands with now half her face covered, the other half exposed. Brittany could see her broken expression from the half of her face baring. Her full lips are in an apathetic line and her eyes so dark and exhausted. Brittany thought her face looked sadder than that of the mask.

"Oh, San-"

"I would like for you to leave now, Brittany. Don't make this harder than it should be..."

Brittany sat helplessly in her seat. Santana wasn't pleading nor demanding. She looks simply worn out and for once Brittany can understand that. It's not like she expected a warm welcoming anyway. Santana needs a little time and she should give her space. Gazing as deep she can into Santana's charcoal orbs, Brittany slowly nods her head.

"I understand," her voice came out light, just like it had when they were back in high school and she would comfort her friend. "Santana, I will give you time. I will. But I will not give up on you. I will not give up on us. I was stupid back then and maybe a little now too- but I've been trying. And I _will _write beautiful poetry about you like you deserve and I _will _dance with you as you sing. So, if you want some time you can have it but don't take too long. I waited a whole year just to see you again. There wasn't anyone else on my mind but you. I just want you to know you weren't the only one alone. I put myself through hell for _us."_

Ending on that note, Brittany wheeled out the door and left Santana gaping. This was the first time the Latina ever considered Brittany's feelings when she left. Maybe she wasn't getting the whole picture after all. Maybe it's time to grow up- but also stay a toddler.

A faint glint caught Santana's eyes from the floor. She placed her mask back down on her dresser and inched over to her friendship bracelet. Crouching down, she carefully lifted up the shining object as if it was a delicate flower and examined it. Unable to help herself any longer, she slowly put her hand through it and let it wrap loosely around her wrist. The feeling is so familiar; as if it were lost for the longest time and found again.

Siting down with her back against the wall, Santana wrapped her free hand around her wrist and bracelet. Tear began to flow freely down her cheeks and she didn't bother to fight them back. Her arms and torso began to shake as she threw her hands to her eyes and let herself sob.

Brittany sat in the room next to Santana's. She sadly listened to the beautiful girl cry as she wrapper her hand around her own wrist and bracelet. Hearing Santana cry made herself cry. It's bittersweet because they both cry out of sadness and of hope.

There's still hope.


	23. A Final Note, A Shit Ending Haha Sorry

Okay, sorry folks but this looks like the ending. It's not even a real ending. I guess I'll just say what was going to happen just to give you guys a little like clarity or something. I was going to have Marissa die, of course, and then at the funeral Santana was going to be crying and all when Brittany magically finds the strength to walk again. Ehh, I just let things get out of hand with all the shit I had going on in this story and everything just became so unrealistic that I had to stop. Haha, sorry to have wasted your time but maybe I gave you guys some ideas on whatever or something if you want to write?

Which leads me to one last thing I want to say. I really liked the whole idea of Brittany not being able to work her legs again because it's so angsty and horrible and everything. So if you want to write a fic like this please go ahead, I mean it would probably be great. But since this was my first fanfic I just let things go bad and everything cause I wanted to come in here with a big bang and all. But totally inform me if anyone is gonna do something like this, I would love to read and review it.

And my reviewsers, thank you a whooole bunch. You guys really inspired me to power on with most of the story and maybe one day I will actually finish this with a serious ending but I don't really think that's a possibility now.

But I do like writing and I will continue to write a bunch of little one-shots and maybe a multi-chapter story or two. Thanks for everything guys.

_**IF YOU HAVEN'T PLEASE READ ALITTLEMUSICAL'S FANFICS. THEY ARE FUCKING AMAZING AND I PROMISE YOU THAT YOU WILL NOT REGRET READING ANY ONE OF THEM. REALLY, CHECK THAT SHIT OUT. IT'S LIKE GETTING HIGH READING THOSE STORIES. GIVE THE WRITER SOME INSPIRATION, TOO. SHE NEEDS IT. WRITING GETS ANNOYING AFTER A WHILE. **_

Everyone else, peace.


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